Raw Crystal Child

STOP SENDING ME LOVE AND LIGHT!!!

2012-02-05T01:38:00.000-08:00

So I cut off the peel of a big juicy orange today and then sliced it in half...this was going to be my breakfast...a lot of times we forget how perfect a simple meal can be that has only one ingredient and takes no time to prepare, and for your consideration, I offer you: the orange. It has a course and bitter outer covering but inside are many segments of juicy pulp, and inside each segment are hundreds of tiny segments that are joined together by a thin paper skin. It's really quite amazing just to look at and also to eat. I think sometimes we just get inundated by something and we forget to marvel in it's simple majesty. Like, it's pretty amazing, that a person, with a life full of experience of trial and error, can click a few buttons and offer you great advice for advancing your own life, your daily practices or even your spirituality. I want to take a minute and just set the record straight, as much as can be done in a few paragraphs on a blog out in interwebs land...I think maybe I just started vlogging too much and forgot the simple majesty of the written word.

A few years ago I started getting really passionate about videography and editing and how many amazing things could be done with film. Up until that point, my only real interest in film was watching it...major movie buff and seriously into all the nuances that make a great film: cinematography, music and placement, the storyline and how to unfold it...I'm really a story teller at heart and I had mostly been doing that through poetry and then music from my late teens into my twenties and then some. So when a videographer from Malaysia came to visit Alaska for work to supplement his meager filmmaking earnings by working on airplanes for a summer and happened upon a little concert I was giving at a local venue here in town called SnowGoose (he had seen my photo in the weekly paper as they were keen on promoting local music and I was always sending them press releases so I got my fair share of ink back in the day), he liked what he saw and offered to bring his cameras to my next gig and film the whole affair. Another friend of mine was getting involved in videography at the time as well and asked if he could tag along so we ended up with three camera angles, and my friend ended up with all the footage that the original videographer just dropped in his lap on his way out of town, and the finished product left me highly facinated with the prospect of video editing (that video project got it's own article in the Anchorage Daily News as well) and I soon purchased my first handheld camera after doing lots of research on what was the best for the cheapest. I set to the task of following myself around with a camera to show what happens behind the scenes in the life of a wanna be rock star who also was constantly on the spiritual path (by which I mean, searching for ways to get closer to the divine and my higher power, to clarify because I have come to find that the spiritual path means many different things to many people, and apparently to some people it means no sexuality, more on that later).

Along the road of this videography, I made an album with some pretty awesome help from Ken Stringfellow, Jon Auer (both from the Posies) and Brock Lindow (36 Crazyfists) and somewhere along the way I had a huge wake-up call and I became a vegan practically overnight. This was a miracle really, because I had been struggling to become a vegetarian for many years and the meat addiction always took over and thwarted all my efforts. However, this wakeup call came with a powerful premonition dream (an energy being put her hand on my belly and said I had cancer and then gave a series of letters and numbers and when I woke up, surprised that I had been asleep because it was so vivid and real, I googled the character series and it was a chemotherapy for cancer) and the voice of the Divine itself "why are you killing my babies" as I "accidentally" watched an undercover animal testing facility video and suddenly for the first time ever, saw what was done to animals in the name of science, and making products "safe" for humans. Interesting side note: later when I learned about breatharianism, I heard Genesis (Jericho) Sunfire say exactly this phrase, he also heard this voice in his mind when he put his hand on a watermellon in a grocery store. The Divine is ALWAYS trying to talk to us. It's up to us to let the voice get through. It seems to come in times of extreme awareness and often stress or life and death situations. In my case, I was looking at a slow painful death if I didn't change my diet.

To make a short story LONG, the reason I brought all this up is to illustrate how my youtube channel got started. I'd already started enjoying my late in life new passion with videography, and here I was a baby vegan in the middle of making a movie. Of course the subject matter got folded into that documentary (which you can now watch in pieces on my OLD youtube channel-more on that later) but here I was inventing all kinds of new awesome vegan recipes from my old standby homecooked style eating I'd been raised on, and I decided it would be fun to share some of those recipes. I had no intention to get tons of views, or to make money, I didn't even know you could. I just got into it for the pure joy of combining my two favorite new passions: filmmaking and vegan recipe creation. Along the way I made a couple of music videos for my own songs. There really wasn't a lot on that channel, just a few recipes, a few music videos...nothing fancy. At some point, my camera took a nose dive and that channel just sat there for a good couple of years.

Then I found living foods, or rather, the lifestyle found me, when I was looking for a way to heal fibromyalgia and myofacial tension syndrome after an addiction to pain medication had taken over my life, my body, my health and my finances. Pretty soon I was the crazy scientist in the kitchen again, mixing, dehydrating, blending, juicing, CREATING with such joy. I was the star of the raw food potlucks. "How did you make this?!" was always the question whenever anyone tried my awesome raw food, and the anser was never a recipe, because I don't use recipes, or follow them, nor am I able to translate the way I prepare food to paper. Also I was spending a lot of time WATCHING youtube, learning about health and watching other people make raw food and talk about raw food and superfoods and supplements. Pretty soon I figured I would just start making videos on my raw food recipes, that way, people could see what it's like to prepare food intuitively and I could join in on educating people about how exciting are the changes in your life when you adopt a living food lifestyle and detox your body.

I would always end up talking about my view of reality on those videos, why I felt that raw foods was the missing link in most people's walk on the spiritual path...it was incredible how heightened my inutition became, how I simply would ask questions and answers would fall into my mind. The synchronicities compounded and life started to be very magical. For about a year I made a living just teaching raw food classes, doing some healing work, and playing music, mostly hosting open mics and getting paid to sing, and also child support helped round it out and make it work, but I definitely was not living on child support, it was just enough to make it all possible. Pretty soon I started receiving lots of comments, mostly questions, about this and that or the other thing and after a while I decided I wanted my channel to be about more than just food or recipes. I decided I would call it "Ask a Crystal Child" because I'd spent a lot of time explaining this type of life purpose that my kids and I were here for and many others I knew were out there struggling to handle being very sensitive in a world that is very broken and very callous. I just figured, I could share what I know, after years of struggling to understand, and to finally reach a place where it starts to make some sense (the place where you realize what you need to do to actually wake up!). It just kinda took off...lots of people were interested and submitted their questions. In the beginning it was easy to ignore the trolls and jerks, but over time, as you gain momentum, so do you gain unwanted attention from people who have no intention to take anything useful and leave the rest, but instead it started to feel like highschool again...where people make fun of the different girl who hangs out by herself because there's no round holes and those square holes are just so uncomfortable for round pegs. I also eventually got tired of all the hassle it took to make ends meet and I wanted to finish making the movie I started making (this time a feature film with a plot) and there was no money to save, so I went back to waitressing after a short jaunt to LA and my first water fast snapped me into the reality of how toxic I was, how long of a haul I was in for, and basically came back to Alaska to start from scratch.
This winter I had as much as I could take of waitressing, serving dead animal carcasses to fat, sick, demanding jerks in super high stress conditions and over the years, the work ethic has gone down to nothing. I grew up in an era where you had pride in your ability to do a good job and you didn't slack off to leave your coworkers to do all the work. In this day and age, with the youth taking over the job market in this kind of entry level position, I found it impossible and intolerable, not just to wait hand and foot on murdering assholes, but also the help was for shit. And I hated my last job so much I got myself fired (the Universe works in mysterious ways) pretty much because the coworkers whose jobs I didn't do for them, banded together and lied to the boss. Be that as it may, I should have left that job long before then, my spritit was shriveling as I would cry for the hour before I had to get ready and drag my body there for those miserable hours of bootlicking bullshit for what seemed like peanuts. Still, there I was in quite the pickle with no money saved, living from one nights tips to the next and raising two kids with no child support (the collection agency hasn't gotten me any payments in over a year).

With many people adding me everyday on Facebook and youtube, the commentary became overwhelming. Everyone has an opinion on who you are supposed to be and how you are supposed to act, and I just am who I am, doing what I do...I've never fit into a box or followed the societal norm. Even the mere act of venting about my job got all sorts of unwarrented judgement and advice when I realized people think I am not supposed to have any feelings or express them. In fact, that is the OPPOSITE of who I am and how I've always presented myself. I have feelings! I have things to say about how fucked up everything is! And I'm empathic to energy so I feel it doubletime or better! And when I revealed that I was trying webcam modeling, being that I am very comfortable with myself and my sexuality, oh the insanity! People all over the place, who I have never met, decided it was their business to tell me what I terrible person I am, being a prostitute and what horrible effect it will have on my poor children. Jiminy Christmas...you would think I was serving DEAD BODIES ON PLATES TO SICK PEOPLE!!! In fact, I had done several videos on the connection between spirituality and sexuality and how they are so overlooked. In fact, I think it's a huge part of the reason humanity is in crisis right now, sexual repression! Anyway, to be quite honest, I would much rather make a living helping people, selling my book and hypnosis videos and chaga, and touring the world giving inspirational talks...and frankly, it's much harder than it sounds, it's not all just taking your clothes off and getting paid, there is a HUGE song and dance and it's like playing poker all night, trying to lure guys into private chat where you get paid. Now if I was just getting paid constantly to be sxy and cute and entertaining, great, it would be a lot better...but I spend the greater part of my time NOT getting paid and I hate it...it's a hassle...a hassle I would rather avoid, but right now I have to do SOMETHING to pay for groceries and support my art...because there is still a great movie to be made, and more after that when I capture the audience I have been looking for.

Today I sat down with my orange and I got some more of this nonsense "your negativity is throwing me for a loop. I'm sending you love and light." and I am just so sick of the whole thing...I am a human just like you my friends...I am allowed to vent, and I didn't start my channel for YOU, I started it for ME...to share what I want to share and if that means venting, that's what it means. If you don't like it, don't linger around me. I'm going to vent. I'm going to share the things that piss me off. And the thing that now pisses me off the most is all these "love and light" people who don't see the mirror. I'm the most honest thing you are ever going to see on the spritual scene. When all the other spiritual motivators are dead from cancer because they couldn't resolve all their anger issues, just remember the girl who was able to vent and allowed herself to "get mad" and tell the truth about it. If you think I need your love and light I don't need you around...because what I actually need, and the reason i started doing all this in the first place, is for YOU to focus on YOU...because if you look at me and all you see is my negativity, you need to get out the shovel and uncover that shit in your own life...you are allowing the mirror to distract you rather than seeing it for what it is: the key to uncovering some messy shit that needs to be hulled out and taken a good long look at it. Go ahead and scream at it, kick it, kill that sonabitch, cause the next time you look at MY frustration and miss the message, your just adding to the noise my friend...it's time to roll your sleeves up and get started. My work here is done.

Oh yes, I'm starting a new youtube channel, mainly so that I don't have the 15 min limit, but also because I want a clean slate...it's just that time. New directions...check out my old channel for my documentary (mentioned previously at the begining of this ramble) and the link to my new channel...which I've got lots of nifty stuff up my sleeve...I hope you'll join in...but only if you aren't one of those compassion freak love and lighters who doesn't "do" real emotions. smooches!!
OLD YOUTUBE

Chaga and Birch Polypore

2012-02-02T22:01:00.000-08:00

Today I harvested a nice chaga and right next to it were two very fresh and beautiful birch polypore or sometimes called shelf mushrooms...this is highly prized medicinal tree mushroom and I love these for their fragrance and beauty. I decided what a perfect opportunity to introduce people to these wonderful healers from natures medicinal cabinet. The next two people who order chaga (The larger one for the person who makes a $100 order and the smaller one for the $30 order) or three (if three people make a small order instead I will cut the larger shroom into halves) will receive a free birch polypore to try out. These are quite different from chaga in their taste, the tea is quite bitter...but it has a lot of different properties as well as many of the same, as they are both growing on the same tree...what a mushroom does, how it grows, is that the body of the mushroom is a series of root like structures that grow inside the tree and these roots take all the wonderful properties of the tree and condense them...and the mushroom is the fruit of that body with all of it's many wonderful condensed properties. I have researched both of these mushrooms (and many other medicinal tree mushrooms) quite well, but to give you an idea of the benefits of birch polypore, I have copied an article I found online with bullet points on it's main benefits. The picture of the mushrooms I took today when I returned home, they are really nice and fresh, though usually bright white underneathe, I threw them in the same bag with my chaga and they picked up the black chaga fragments a little, it's no worry, just a little bonus chaga on your birch polypore. Make a tea with the birch polypore the same way you would with a chaga mushroom, though you'll want to use small amounts in a smoothie or juice to disguise the bitter taste

Visit my website to learn much more about chaga and to order chaga for your free birch polypore sample!!

http://www.racrystalpalace.com

Birch Polypore Used for Intestinal Parasites during Stone Ages.

Oetzi the Iceman's 5,300 Year Old Remedy Rediscovered
Summary of research on the medicinal mushroom Birch Polypore (Piptoporus betulinus). Used since the Stone Ages as an anti-parastic and antibiotic natural remedy, it was found in a pouch among the remains of Oetzi the Iceman, a mummified Stone Age man from 5,300 years ago found in a Alpine ice cave. Experts agree he used it as a remedy for intestinal parasites.

*As suggested by its name, Birch Polypore grows on birch trees, living or dead. It grows around the world wherever birch trees are found.

*Birch Polypore's main claim to fame is that it was found among the possessions of Oetzi, the mummified Stone Age man from 5,300 years ago whose remains were found in 1991 in a glacial ice cave on the border of Italy and Austria.

*The general consensus is that Oetzi the Iceman used the Birch Polypore against an infection of the intestinal parasite Trichuris trichuria, of which eggs were found among his remains. [190]

*Folk lore from Europe tells of Birch Polypore being used in this fashion, as a remedy against parasites. It has also been used as a general antibiotic, and to stop bleeding. [25]

*Two studies from 1997 found that certain Birch Polypore extracted compounds were anti-inflammatory, [192] and that they specifically helped reduce skin inflammation. [191]

*It was found effective against Bacillus megateterium, [194] and a study in 2000 found it to contain an antibiotic compound named Piptamine. [193] Paul Stamets suggests that it be studied for effectiveness against Bacillus anthracis, more commonly known as anthrax. [134]

*Another potent compound isolated from Birch Polypore is Betulinic Acid, which is produced by birch trees and then extracted and concentrated by the Birch Polypores. A study on melanoma in 1995 found that Betulinic Acid exhibited toxicity against melanoma cells while having no adverse effect on healthy cells. [195] A later study, in 2002, may have discovered the mechanism behind Betulinic Acid's cancer toxicity when it found that it inhibits certain enzymes involved in the growth and development of tumors. [196]

*In a 2001 study on the effect of Betulinic Acid derivatives on HIV, it was reported that these compounds blocked HIV replication. [197]

*A U.S. patent on a Birch Polypore extract was filed in 2004 by world leading medicinal mushroom expert Paul Stamets, after research at the U.S. Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Disease (USAMRIID) and the National Institute of Health (NIH) concluded that his proprietary Birch Polypore extract was effective against vaccinia virus and cowpox, and non-toxic to human tissues. [134]

Note: The statements on this page have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This article is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Always consult a licensed medical practitioner before using any herb (or mushroom) for medicinal purposes.

About the Author: Dr. Markho Rafael has worked with natural health since Chiropractic College in the mid-90's. He now specializes in writing and research on medicinal mushrooms, specifically working with the MycoMedicinals of Paul Stamets, whose Birch Polypore extract is part of the synergistic blend Paul Stamets Host Defense for Travelers. For research references to this article, visit the Piptoporus betulinus research page.

Why it's important to develop self esteem which coincides with forgiveness

2012-01-29T21:19:00.001-08:00

Ascension: a documentary

2012-01-29T00:01:00.000-08:00

Hey guys, I have recently uploaded all the parts of my documentary: "Ascension: a documentary by songwriter Crystal Hutchens" as a way to get you all revved up for new projects, the movie I have been working on for a long time, and other movie projects I have started working on...I've also been doing a lot of these goofy little, "sh*t people say" videos and I have mroe coming, the most recent one was "Sh*t kids say" and the one coming up next is "sh*t metaphysical eco health nuts say" ...if you use the title of this video at the top left corner to link to youtube you can watch all the rest of this documentary about my songwriting career in a small town with a new introduction about my discoveries over the last few years...I hope you will enjoy it, and I have lots more exciting stuff coming your way this year...we are going to blow up the airwaves this year and beyond...finding bigger and bigger soapboxes for the message: "Immortality in our lifetime" ...we also recently filmed a segment with Channel 2 news about our local spring that will air on local television and the interwebs in a few weeks...the behind the scenes footage will be posted shortly...feeling inspired and optimistic...stop by and catch some of the energy, it's contagious:

show promo stuffs

2012-01-17T04:28:00.000-08:00

Please check out my new TV show on Blip TV

2012-01-15T17:30:00.000-08:00

From now on I will be ignoring all the petty crap people try to fling at me (yes I am still being harassed daily) and I will be chanelling it into my new tv show at my new platform Blip TV:

http://www.blip.tv/crystalhutchens

Here's an episode from the show--I'll be introducing lots of characters this year...when you get to my page check out the hilarious "Trolling Trolls" to see snapshot characters I may be elaborating on as we go...it's time for me to expose a new side of myself to the world:

Trolling trolls...the people who hound me constantly

2012-01-09T06:30:00.001-08:00

Trolling trolls from Crystal Hutchens on Vimeo.

FB...stands for "fu**ing bullsH*T

2012-01-03T01:29:00.000-08:00

So I am sitting here unable to reply to all the posts on my facebook page because once again some douche bag flagged a photo of me that was neither sexually explicit, not offensive in any way...it wasn't even nude! I think the problem is people are jealous, but let me tell you something...I am FED THE FUCK UP...with all the douche bags (yes that is my new favorite word) that live in internet land. My first inclination was to go delete everyone I don't know on FB. But after it took three steps per person I quit on the second one realzing there was no way I was going to make a dent in the 4000 assholes who massquerade as my "friends" in interweb world. In the first place, I don't understand why people don't just LEAVE my FB page if I post something they don't like. But nope, we live in sexually repressed ville, capital of the world where it's fine to sell sex alongside your music, your magazines, your newspapers, your films and TV...but try to make a living being beautiful and fucking forget about it. People hate you when your beautiful...and they hate that you could actually make money being incredibly sexy and talented and unique and creative and forward thinking when they are stuck sitting in a grey cubicle barely able to pay their bills. People are unhappy when they think you aren't suffering as much as they are. But trust me, I do suffer...I suffer every single day when I find shit that is so epically ridiculous, judgmental and self righteous, from people who seriously don't have a CLUE what this world is about, trying to tell ME how to live in their fucked version of reality...clogging up my email box on every single application I use online. I hate everyone today...except my kids and my lover...the people who were actually close to my actual body today...the people who actually KNOW me, who are the only people who have a right to judge me...and who accept me for who I am. The rest of the people, you can suck it. Look at me...I've become a mirror of the shit that gets flung at me DAILY. For what? For posting about my life...for sharing my hopes and dreams and visions...for trying to HELP people of all crimes against humanity. Sheesh. Yep, you won't be seeing much of me around FB anymore...I guess I can leave this relic standing like myspace ghostland. I'm starting a profile on Google+...not really sure what I will do with it, but I won't be adding a bunch of assholes that I don't know. I won't be sending out waves of positivity on FB anymore...I won't be responding to a bunch of pointless garble. I might post videos on there for a little while longer...only because they do tend to get a bunch of views from there and 2012 is the year of my financial success. I could give two shits what people think ever again...the only reason I'm going to be making videos at all is for the income it can drive into my life...I won't be answering queries that don't come with a paycheck...I won't be allowing comments on my videos anymore...I won't raise my smallest finger for a single fucking person unless there is a paycheck attached. I've gotten plenty of well meaning advice about how I am supposed to ignore the negative people and have compassion and accept everyone but NO...fuck that. You aren't living my life and you aren't assaulted by fucktards everyday so you don't have a say in how I will respond or approach my situation. So, unless your email has something to do with how you can get my paid services, don't expect a reply. I am RETIRED From being your go-to girl for all your free advice. Bye Bye FB...you won't be kicking me off your piece of shit platform for not following your "community guidlines" that I didn't break...I will be leaving you on my own...and fuck you very much. See ya on Google+ (still Crystal Hutchens) if you want to join my group of FRIENDS...if you know what that word means...the rest of you game players and promoters and networkers and childish dumbasses...fuck you very much...and I hope I never fucking hear the word Namaste again...I've never heard such a misused phrase in the mouths of the worst offenders of hate, abuse, judgment, self righteousness and hypocrits...namaste is something you say when you see a person for who they are...not something you attach to the end of a fucking superiority complexed ignorant rant. What I wish for you all in the new year is the wake up call you so desperately need...it won't be coming from me...I've got nothing left to say to anyone on this site. If you need support, start with the "BUY NOW" buttons on RACRYSTALPALACE.COM ...or CRYSTALHUTCHENS.COM ...I'll be doing personal Cam shows for $2 per minute on Skype now...the buy buttons will be on CRYSTALHUTCHENS.COM ...you'll need to pay and then discuss scheduling...price breaks start after 30 minutes and go down from there. It's cheaper than the cam site, but you do have to get blocks of time, so if you just want a few mins you still will probably want to check out the regular pay per minute site. All my healing and hypnosis services and hypnosis videos are still available. Chaga is still available. My book is available. My music is available. Writing me and getting free assistance: NO LONGER AVAILABLE.TTFN

Cam models tips

2011-12-30T20:30:00.000-08:00

People have been contacting me a lot about my new webcam venture...they want to know how to get started mostly, or what site to use...I've messed around with a lot of sites and I still find Streammates to be the best for functionality and reliable weekly checks, the sign up was the easiest of every site I've checked out...I was up and running within 24 hours of submitting all my info...here is a response to a facebook query I received (two men in one day asked for my advice...there is a market for gay men, or playing gay, but I don't know about straight men...I think if your a man and you want to make it in the cam world you're going to be dealing with male clients).Alright. I was curious, so I checked out your live cam and sent a few bucks your way. Great job! You're quite the performer. Can you make decent $ doing that? I'm considering doing something like that myself because my grad student stipend doesn't cover nearly enough. Of course, I'm working under the pretense that this isn't necessarily too demanding and the hours are flexible. Is that accurate?I'm on my 4th week and I've got a little tiny following and the swing of it and it just keeps getting better. In my first week I made $277...that is my best so far, because I haven't put a ton of time into it, over Christmas I was being a bit of a slacker...I am going to top my sales this week...I should be looking at closer to $400...It is definitely possible to make over a hundred dollars a day (and I'm just a beginner) but you do have to put a few hours into it. The more time you spend on there, the more fans you get, the easier it is to make your money...it is 100% flexible...you choose whenever you want to get online and leave whenever you want. If you’re having a bad day you can throw in the towel and come back again the next day to hit it harder. Never let a bad day throw you, sometimes there just isn't a lot of traffic depending when you work. I already have a few regulars who visit me several times a week. I had one of my guys come back for a second session today...an hour later. That's happened more than once. You need to let them think you're available and that there is a relationship potential...they need someone to make them feel good about themselves or a little less lonley. There is definitely work involved...everyone is asking for as much as they can get for free. You can't show below the belt nudity in free chat which is a line you can always fall back on, "I would love to show you baby, but it's not allowed, you don't want me to lose my job do you? Then I couldn't see you anymore, but I would love to show you in private"… you're like a salesman though...you have to show them just enough to get them into the paid chat...I have seen a lot of women giving it all away for free...I don't know how they make a living, but I think in some cases, guys will jump into exclusive to get the woman all to themselves...they are also the director of the show once they're paying...I will do a quick kitty flash for gold, I've never gotten in trouble...they do take a huge percentage so I am trying to do external advertising to sell things like my panties and stockings and eventually DVDs. I think that's where my real money is eventually going to come from, but this is building the client base...you aren't allowed to give away personal information like websites and emails, and you especially can't promote other cam sites, but I told someone my name the other day and said I guess if you google me, I didn't give you my web address...he is supposedly going to buy my panty hose after I wear them for hima few more times, meanwhile, paying for all those times I wear them for him. It's a challenge if you have several semi interested clients, you are just trying to get anyone into paid chat...then the one who pops in there might just be in for less than a minute and you just lost everyone in the room...but more than one person can go into paid chat at a time, so sometimes that happens where you get a few guys chomping at the bit and when one takes you to private another one or two follow and get you some extra paid time. Forget the guys who say, "show me this and I'll take you private for 20 min"...they are 99% full of shit, I don't know why they think that shit works—I guess probably the newbie girls fall for it, but I never did, it just reeks of bullshite...I had the same guy delivering me the same exact line like 3 nights in a row and I said to him, am I really that forgetable, you forgot I don't fall for that shit?" He left and didn’t come back, ha ha. sometimes a little flash works to get them into private, and then sometimes just the teensiest little tease will get them too hot to handle it anymore and they will pay, or sometimes withholding for paid chat (Sorry sweety I can only show you in private and I really want you to see how wet you’re making me)...you gotta learn to read your room. These guys that come in and write novels about what they are going to do to you...I almost never respond, they almost never want paid time...they want me to interact with them and chat them up for free. Here is an example, "If we were roleplaying and you were my mommy what would be the first thing you would say?" My answer is, "roleplaying starts when we go private" because otherwise, they will just get as much out of you as they can and then leave when their satisfied—in general, if you don’t start chatting their fantasy in free chat they will leave because they aren’t there for paid chat, and you want to weed out who is looking for paid time and who is trying to basically steal your time in the guest room...you can tell when all a guy needs is dirty talk to get off, well, they need to pay for that...so the golden rule is never pay too much attention to anyone in the room...but be very nice to your regulars, try to remember their names or what they like so you can make a comment that shows you appreciate them and they mean a lot to you. The best is getting people to sign up through your site...then you get an extra 40% on top of the 35% you are already getting...then you not only get 75% of any time they spend with you, but also 20% of any time they spend with anyone else in the entire system. Also gold shows are good...its another functionality of the site that allows you to advertise and tease for a show and take a small fee from several people then perform for a specified amount of time...it's a win/win especially when you have a lot of fans...I've seen some of these girls who have been doing it for a while, they are doing shows for 10 minutes or less for $250. You set a goal amount and if you don't reach that goal you can choose to cancel your show and start the counter again or just take the gold that was offered and do the show...if I'm having a slow night I'll do a cheap gold show, and I'll be making long term fans that way as well. Different sites vary a little on the details, there are pluses and minuses to each site...I am signed up to another site that has 10 times the traffic, but hardly anyone pays for private time or tips, because the whole site is functional without them paying, whereas on my site, they can't do a cam 2 cam (lots of guys want you to see THEM) unless they are in paid chat...whereas, members of myfreecams can show you themselves without paying for anything, so you get all these stupid messages like, "hey baby, wanna see me strokin it?" I dont bother to respond, the only good thing about that site is that you can promote anything and give away your personal information, so it's worth it to me to spend 20-40 mins doing a little teasing for these guys and let them have my actual website address, where I will hopefully eventually get their business on my other site, or sell them some product. Well I hope this has been helpful…I think the most important tip I can give is to stick with it, because it is very slow to get started…yes the website is advertising you on many sites at once, but guys tend to be loyal to the girls they like so the girls (or guys) who have been doing it for a long time have a big following. Just keep your nose to the grindstone for a while as you build up interest. Once you have someone in private, do everything you said you would, follow their instructions and please them to the best of your ability because getting a high rating will improve business as well. You start out with 4 stars, but with enough 5 star ratings, your rating goes up. Write about everything you offer in your description section…the more you are willing to do, the more potential customers you will have. There is also potential to make money in your guest room…guys come in all the time and say, “show me your tits!” My response is, “show me some gold!” …anytime someone starts a sentence with “show me…” I respond with, “show me the gold!” …I have never had a single client who promised to take me private if I showed him something follow through. At best, they will beg and ply you with promosies…at worst they will really have you believing them, this guy had me convinced last night we were going private…but within a couple minutes I realized it had all been a set-up…he pretended to live in my same town and offered to pay me a lot to meet in person…my response to that is always, “I need to get to know you in private first” …but I also have a photo shoot option on my website…he had told me, “I just submitted a request for a photo shoot” but there is no such thing as submitting a request, so I knew he was lying and his next query was for me to suck on my finger…I said, “I’ve been very accommodating to you and we still haven’t gone private like you promised,” and with that he left…I hate it when I get taken on a ride, so I tend to keep my interaction with everyone very general, no gold, no goodies…and spread your attention around the room, because you never know who your next private is going to be…it’s usually the quiet one who either doesn’t ask for anything, or asks a couple of very pointed questions to make sure they will get what they need from you in private…anyone trying to occupy your time like your new best buddy is wasting your attention…I make a point to blatantly ignore those people…throwing out a “If you want my attention you can get it in private” every so often…a lot of times guys say they will be right back for a private show…I find it’s about 50/50 with these guys…so you never know.Every chance you get, give a great no holds barred show, and keep your regulars happy, they ARE your bread and butter.Check out my show, or sign up for an exciting work from home experience:http://cinnamonstar.cammodels.com

Adventures of a webcamming newbie

2011-12-26T00:30:00.000-08:00

When I unexpectedly lost my job a month before Christmas, I had no money saved, was living paycheck to paycheck, and suddenly found myself in a world of desperation...bills on the horizon, that nights tips had been expected for grocery money and I was instantly LOST! I cried out to my youtube supporters for donations and purchases from my online store (donations always receive very nice hypnosis video links), such as chaga, my ebook, consultations, personal hypnosis videos and anything else I have on offer that would be supportive. I was underwhelmed by the response. People write to me almost daily to rave about how much I impact their lives, how they love to start their day with my inspirational and informative videos about everyone's life questions. But when it comes to giving back, most people are stingy and selfish, in my opinion. We have become milkfed to desire cheap, worthless crap, and never really put our money where it's needed...on working on our spirit and supporting the people who are helping us to do that. There are a lot of topline teachers right now giving away their many services for free on youtube...myself, I am inundated with constant requests for information via youtube, facebook, my contact form on my website...always begining with something like, "you are exactly the person I have been looking for to answer my questions" and dare so much as mention a consultation fee and you are often insulted as being "in it for the money." These kinds of comments are common, "I didn't know you were in it for the money, I believe spiritual information should be shared freely." or the most hilarious, "If I had all your wisdom I would spend ALL my time helping others for free." Ya right...and who is going to take care of your family? I have two babays to feed and clothe and spoil my peeps. So I took the advice of a friend and decided to check out webcam modeling. As I was getting started, the days passed and more and more chaga and hypnosis orders came in...I got a couple of generous donations and enough book sales to realize I would be OK if I just took a couple days to stop job hunting for a job I didn't want and seriously think about what I wanted to do, which the bottom line was, I wanted to stay home and not have to ever think about childcare again! And I wanted to make plenty of money so as to not have to stress or worry about paying bills anymore, or what I could or could not afford at the grocery store. My friend told me a little about his adventures as a gay webcam model, gave me the web address to get started, and supported me by answering all my questions and giving me tips. You would think it would be so simple, dress up sexy, turn on the camera, and wait for the cash to start rolling in. Turns out it's a lot more like poker! Which is fine, I like poker, but there is a lot of bargaining involved, a lot of "wheeling and dealing" (lucky I got that salesmanship gene from daddy, I can talk most people into buying anything I believe in, and luckily I do happen to believe in myself." The great part is, once you win a hand (talk someone into going in the paid private room) you set your price and you're making a percentage of every minute. I set my price at 1.99 to start, but within a month I decided to move it up to 2.99 and I haven't noticed a decline, it seems to help actually. I think if you put a higher value on your show, so will others...people know they get what they pay for so if they want the good stuff they are willing to pay a little more. I did an experiment one night where I brought my price down to .99 a minute for a couple hours and not a single person bought time with me. I think a low price just screams, "worthless!!" so don't be afraid to set a reasonable price if you decided to try this. If you give a good show, you rack up five star ratings, and you'll move your rating up (it starts at 4 stars, but I finally broke five starts yesterday with enough five star ratings after hovering at 4.5 for the last few weeks). I've been asked to do lots of strange things...suck on my toes, pee in a glass, stuff a sock in my nether regions...but mostly it's just lonely guys, many of whom are very attractive (they get to choose if you see them or not so there are many you never see) who just want to spend some sensual time with a pretty girl. It's all about putting on a positive attitude, owning your beauty and your sexual prowess, and then stirring them into a frenzy till they can't stand it anymore, they've just GOT to see the rest of you...or be able to tell you what to do. I never spend a lot of time taking orders from quests...they will say all kinds of silly shite like, "pull your panties down and I promise I'll take you private 20 minutes." If you fall for that you WERE born yesterday. But a little perfectly timed flash can do the trick now and again...I tend to stick with the adage, "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free" but there are guys who need to know you have a certain quality that they want to pay for (do you have big nipples? are you shaved or hairy? Can I see your behind? I like a big booty...ect)...it helps to keep moving around, show them plenty without showing them all so that they are desperate to see the rest. I'm getting in great shape, dancing, stretching, showing off my flexibility...it can be fun and a workout. But it's not all fun and games...the worst is when you have a room full of guys in the guest (unpaid) room al bargaining for a show, and then some yahoo takes you into private for 30 seconds and you don't make any money and then you just lost everyone in the guest room. Private happens automatically if the guest decided to click that button...they have 30 seconds before they start getting charged. Some A**holes will use that loophole to get a sneak peek and not pay for anything. In fact, I think there is a small army that goes around preying on private sessions, popping in to get a sneak peek and then popping out. You're probably looking at one of these losers if they pop into guest and don't say anything. I don't want to humor these jerks at all, but I don't want to jip a paying customer either, so I try to take everything off as quickly as possible, unless they ask for something specific like strip tease, then if they aren't saying anything, I'm waiting for that 30 seconds to get to anything of value...waste my time and I'll waste yours. Aside from those situations, it's a pretty nice little deal. In general, the guys are respectfull, complimentary, of course there are fetishes and they need to know if I can accomodate them or not. I try to accomodate everything within reason. No, I'm not going to drink my own pee...sorry. Not reasonable...roleplay, a little wacko and a little out there? Sure...hopefully I just prevented some real life lady from getting the brunt of your weird perversion...it's all safe in fantasy land. In only a month I already have a lot of regulars. I'm definitely not making a killing, I'm not even making as much as I was waitressing, but I never have to leave the house if I don't want to, and check comes in the mail every week. I can see how over time I will continue to gather a following and happy regulars who know they get what they pay for. I'm going to be using one site that allows you to give out personal information for external advertising...because everyone I bring in under my webcam page that joins as a member, I receive the regular percentage PLUS 40% on top...and even if they go spend money with other ladies, I receive 20% of all those earnings. There's also something called gold shows, so that when you build up a following, you can charge a fee per person, have a minimum bid and a minimum goal before you start your show, and then you get to entertain multiple recipients for a larger fee because everyone pitching in a little adds up, it's a win/win. I haven't been able to pull it off yet because my fan club isn't big enough, but I see other ladies doing really good with that function...and I see that with my nose to the grindstone, and my commitment to growing my audience, just like with any of my other offerings, this could eventually be a goldmine. And I'm having fun all the while...I have a little side business ready to go as my audience builds...one youtube fan was so moved by my plea for support, and my sharing of my new webcam venture, he sent me his top of the line Sony HD cam that he had purchased a couple years ago and ended up collecting dust...so there are more perks than just cash...and I'll be using that nice little addition to my tool box to make amatuer adult vids (just solo mind you!) as well as selling the undergarments and stockings I've worn in my show. Some of these updates are already available on my website, so I encourage you to stop by and check out the new goings on. Don't worry, I'm still doing all my inspirational work, harvesting wild alaskan chaga for you, and making you the finest intuitive hypnosis videos. I'm getting so much great feedback from my hypno vids from people are trying them and getting excellent forward momentum. That is still a huge part of my life as well as sharing the message of "immortality in our lifetime"...but as I have said when some of the backlash came from former youtube supporters questioning my ethics and morality...we have GOT to realize how intrinsically tied our sexuality is to our spirituality. Repression is not serving us as a society. We've been brainwashed to believe (and quite effectively!) that sex is a vile, filthy thing, or worse, a SACRED act, only to be shared in marriage (a make believe piece of paper invented by religion itself for promoting shame)...it has now become my mission to expose the beautiful acceptance of our sexual nature, and how important that part of our being is to our spiritual self. In fact, I feel that I am responsibly exchanging positive spritual energy with everyone who decides to enter my private room and share intimate time with me. Ever wanted to enjoy a beautiful, intelligent, sexually charged woman in the prime of her life rather than some ditzy fake breasted blonde bimbo who couldn't care less about the experience she is sharing with you? Well now is your change...I'm a real girl...and I'm not afraid to show it. Visit my website for more details on my new venture...and happy holidays everyone...I turned 38 on Christmas, and I feel the best I ever have in my life...in charge...my own boss...and sharing the joy of bliss will all who will come ;) http://www.crystalhutchens.com

The Law of the Subconscious

2011-09-10T05:20:00.000-07:00

So you've heard about "The Secret" and the "Law of Attraction" but it's not working. Sure it is! It's working perfectly. The proof is in your life. Whatever you believe becomes your experience. The negative people you attract into your experience, the bills you keep coming up short for, your flailing health and love life: all products of your subconscious tape recording.
The problem most people experience when they first learn about the Law of Attraction is that they try to change their conscious thinking. You can spend every moment of every day repeating over and over in your mind, "I'm an abundant person" and still the experience you are having is that of poverty consciousness. Trying to change the conscious mind is on par with talking to a tape recording that is playing back and expecting it to record what you are saying. But you haven't pressed the record button so your attempt to change your life by changing your thoughts is literally futile.
What can you do? You have to learn how to press the record button before submitting the changes you would like to see in your external world. Your reality is literally a reflection of what thoughts are playing back. You are very likely not even aware of what your subconscious thoughts are. They were recorded into your subconscious between the ages of 0 and 5-ish when your brain was in a constant state of having the record button on. That state is called the Alpha state which is like a daydream but with mental capacities and awareness. During this state, everything you hear is recorded and stored in that part of your mind that literally creates your reality.
Normal waking consciousness, which is known as the Beta state, is not even entered until the age of 5 or so. Because of this, everything you were told as a child is stored there and creating the life you have now. Many people who are not happy with their current circumstances were told they were worthless or this was expressed through neglect or sometimes abuse. Probably many of us also heard that money was hard to come by and you have to work hard to get it or that true love only happens in fairytales. Whatever the issue is that you want to change, there is a negative thought stored in the subconscious that is the culprit. Most people can not develop self confidence because they cannot develop self love. We can't accept ourselves because we were told our behaviors were unacceptable.
The good news is, you can chance your subconscious tape recording and you can change your life! In the subconscious, all things are possible. Your health, your outer world and what you attract is all being created there. All you have to do is push the record button and set your intentions and your life will begin to transform.
Here's where I come in. When I work with a client, I first do an energetic scan of the body and find out where the person is block. I then use a light hypnotic suggestion to relax them into a state where I can reset the subconscious tape recordings.
A recent client came to me with a lack of direction. He wanted assistance figuring out what he should do next in his life. During the body scan I found a block in his hip. I asked if there was pain there he said recently a lot of pain had been coming and going for no explainable reason. The hip is related to a lack of ability to move forward or nothing to move forward to. Every part of the body is related to an outer world expression. For example, liver problems represent anger at the father. Most people have anger at one or both parents and this has to be resolved to get forward momentum.
We discussed the possibility of not needing to know what was coming up next and we set the intention for having clarity at all times and choosing to live in the now instead of the future. His fear of the future has resolved. No more hip troubles.
Many people want to lose weight or get healthy but their eating habits are related to stored subconscious patterns. Almost everyone in America can benefit from releasing unhealthy eating habits. I empower my clients who want to set health intentions with raw food classes. Eating healthy raises your personal vibration and also makes it easier to set and hold positive intentions. My own intuition and ability to assist others has increased greatly from adopting an earth loving, living food diet. All my services are available in Anchorage and online through my website: WWW.RACrystalPalace.com

Crystal Hutchens M.I. (multi-functional inspirationalist) is an energy hypno-therapist, author of "Crystalism-Why We Die and How We Can Stop" and host of the youtube vlog "Ask a Crystal Child" a free service to humanity to assist the planetary awakening and evolution of mankind. She can be reached at 907-575-7393 for consultations.

Love Speaks - Organization

2011-08-14T02:13:00.000-07:00

Right now the mind is categorizing more things than you can imagine, from a perceptive point of view that has been in place since you were a small child. There is no tone of voice in the written word, yet you the reader will be applying tones and stressing sylables, as certain words and phrases appeal to you in ways you actually don't even understand or realize is happening. One of the reasons energy realignment for a planet your age is so stressful at this time, is because these long held perceptions, which for now we will refer to as the "ego brainwashing" are breaking down. And since it's all you remember knowing for as far back as your current memory dares to wander, a lot of fear surrounds the release of it. We ask you at this time to simply tap into the vast storages of faith readily available to you from your heart space, and trust that everything is working out perfectly and that it is perfectly OK for you to let go and allow this process to happen. Many people on Earth have already moved through this process of the illusion of reality crumbling before their eyes, as the dawning of the truth has been planted here in the collective conscious held by many visionaries for a really long time. This simple fact is going to make it easier and easier for others to follow, much in the same way that a path through the jungle is made by tromping over it again and again. We are asking you to spend time each day getting quiet and reflecting on the abundance of trust available to you and this simple act alone will create the space needed for the unraveling of the brain's current organizational methods. You'll find that when you free up the space spontaneous ideas that bring more joy and peace into your life simply arrive magically from the void where thought is created, and yes of course you can pat yourself on the back for being such a creative genius (cosmic humor) as these ideas arrive and you act on them and watch the magic unfold. Spend as much time in nature as you can with your bare feet on the ground, the earth will take off the excess charged energy from your body, relieving stress and replacing it with calm grounding energy. As more and more fear comes up to be looked at and resolved, more and more conspiracy theories will arise and ripple out, the conscious and subconscious mind will be bringing the nitty gritty dirt of lifetimes to the surface to simply faze itself out. You can stop seeking for external abundance and start recognizing the internal limitless energy that inspires the spirit to move into an organic body and "do the dance" of living. The quickening of the energy and information exponentiation will continue to ebb and flow with it's unacknowledged patterns of expression as the remembering unfolds and expands, expands expands...all desires are being attracted to reveal their true nature and the heart is opening and seeing that real and abundant everlasting love is already all that is happening, like a clever never ending firework display, each moment new and colorful in it's brilliant way as the orgasm of the Universe moves it's heavenly fingers through Earth atmosphere, your species in Earths womb is so close to birth, the awakening of rememberance from which it projected itself into this expression...in other words, relax into the labor pains and marvel at the process...you are being born.

Love Speaks

2011-07-28T02:40:00.000-07:00

Love gave me the nudge today...to start channeling again...it feels like much more is coming...stay tuned:

When you are looking out from the light, you are the light…it’s easy to see how the light created everything, and how light itself became from the void that always existed…but then you want to see what it’s like to be beneath the light, the light streaming down on you from above, the warmth of it, the sheer brilliance of it, and for this you needed a concentrated point of awareness and something tangible to sense it with, and so you created the body you find yourself in now, from the template of the ever present Universal mind you drew forth all of your collected experiences and grew a “learning device” around yourself. Isn’t it amazing? Yes indeed.
From your vantage point it’s not always so easy to appreciate just how incredible is the experience you are having. Your ego often takes over and quite convincingly pretends to be in charge of everything. You’ve collected then, also all the attributes of the many bodies that have used this functionality to perceive all the different things they have chosen to perceive, and like a sieve, you are subject to all of it as it is shuffled around collectively, quite unwittingly, in fact most of the time.
From your confusion of your circumstances, the mind seems like quite an unusual thing and hardly anyone around you has any sense of how to use it properly. Most go on about their day experiencing everything with the mistaken concept that it has nothing to do with themselves, not owning the idea they are actually creating every bit of it. The mind itself is the actual key to all experience, thus it would prove fruitful for anyone wishing to change their circumstances to become aware of the way that the mind works. Right now you are being “given” information through a fellow mind, but this communication is actually available for you yourself to have at any time. The difficulty for most people is a flaw in what is termed belief. For one thing, you must actually have a belief in something in order to experience it. When you are capable of cultivating beliefs like that, then you will start to understand where your power actually comes from. Since remembering how to believe is the first step, let’s start with something small. Pick a thing that seems inconsequential that will also be easy for you to believe such as, “the next person I see is going to smile at me” or anything random that suits you that you can cultivate a belief in. Then just watch it to unfold. Allow the mesmerization that may come to envelope you like a warm flood of joyful good news. It IS good news. The Universe actually does respond to what you believe. Now that You know it’s true (and if you think your happening was a coincidence try a few more ways of proving it to yourself until you cultivate a fairly unshakable faith that your mind is having a true effect on your tangible reality when true faith is involved) it’s time to take inventory of your thinking. Where are your thoughts hovering? What is the most prominent thing on your mind any time you check in with yourself? And if you are taking an honest inventory, and really noticing where your thoughts are, you’ll see how you are creating all the things you don’t want that arrive in your experience. You ARE in charge and you CAN change how your thinking, in fact it’s really the only thing you can change. Before you get ready for upper level experiences, like manifesting out of “thin air” you’ll need to take the action steps that cultivate your belief system. This can be done quite easily by relaxing the mind and stating in the present tense, that which you mean to experience, for example, “I am very abundant and have everything I need at all times.” For almost everyone, this is already true, most people just aren’t aware of how to perceive their abundance and therefore understand it more clearly which actually nourishes it’s growth. For today let’s simply practice believing that we are indeed in charge. Today’s mantra will be, “I now easily believe that I am creating my reality.”

A list I put together for a class is a bonus for you...raw food top tips

2011-07-12T23:28:00.000-07:00

Navigating the Raw Food Lifestyle

As a raw foodist for several years now, it is kind of annoying how much misinformation is out there. In the beginning I spent a lot of time sifting through websites educating myself and learning things by trial and error. Many don’t realize how many people are in the raw foods movement just to make money and they will tell you anything to sell their product. There isn’t anyone regulating the term “raw” so any company can slap it on their product despite having cooked ingredients in it. If you want the full effects that come from living a clean eating lifestyle, including a heightened sense of awareness and a closer connection to Source (intuition) there is a lot to learn. In the beginning stages of raw, your body is going through a lot of detox. It can be uncomfortable and gourmet raw foods with lots of fats make this process more tolerable. But eventually as your body gets more and more clean you will notice that your body doesn’t do well with a lot of fat or with crazy food combinations. You have to listen to your body and notice when it is not tolerating certain foods so that you can remove them from your diet. There is not a single guru out there who can prescribe the perfect diet for you. Only you can learn to listen to your body and feed yourself your own perfect diet. Eventually you will want to water fast for the most optimum deep cleansing possible. Toxins are stored in fat and when you fast your body goes into ketosis which means it uses fat for fuel. This is when a lot of toxicity can be released. But that is much later in the game. If you’re just starting out on raw there are a few things that are helpful to know. I’ve put together a list to help get you started.

Raw Food Top Tips

*The first thing every raw food initiate should know about is detox! Detox is a defense mechanism of the body; it’s how you are able to get rid of toxins that are reducing the effectiveness of your cells. In actuality your body is detoxing as much as it can all the time, but it’s difficult when it’s bogged down with mucus and toxins. The reason most people wake up feeling sluggish in the morning is because their body has gone into a state of detox and their first morning efforts are to shut it down by drinking coffee or eating sugary or greasy foods. When your body is getting a constant array of fresh, water dense foods, it’s going to stop making the mucus that it uses to digest cooked food. This is going to free up a lot of energy in the body to put towards cleansing. It’s not what you eat that makes a raw food diet healing, it’s what you don’t eat. When the body is no longer bogged down with chemicals and processed cooked foods, it’s going to kick out all the toxins that are stored mainly in fat cells. The body works from the inside out to heal so organs are first on it’s list. If you have back problems, keep in mind you WILL heal, but the muscular system is low on the body’s list of priorities as far as healing goes so that will come later down the path. Detox symptoms can range from mild to extreme depending on your past eating habits, any drugs (prescription or street) you’ve taken, your emotional life ect. Emotions are strongly tied to toxins because we often use food to bury our emotions and when the toxins come up so do the emotions. Be prepared for headaches, nausea, acne, odd skin irritations, anger, sorrow, guilt…all these things need to come to the surface and be released. The body may choose and possible way out to get rid of toxins so the skin is often just as viable a choice as the digestive system, depending where your toxins are stored. Just know that it’s a good thing that you are temporarily feeling lousy because on the other side is a more vibrant, healthy, happy and energetic you. Allow those stored emotions to flow and bless the toxins as they go. The initial intense detox can last a few days or a few weeks, but over time you may run into detox issues again especially if you keep lightening your diet as you go. Many people blame the food and say eating raw doesn’t work for them. Raw Living can work for anyone who puts in the effort to get past the detox and discover the foods that are easiest for your personal body to digest. Every body is unique.

*Be careful if you buy prepackaged raw foods. A lot of people will try to make a buck using cheap ingredients or ingredients that aren’t raw. Read labels carefully. Here are some common ingredients that are NOT raw. If you aren’t sure, contact the company: agave (is not only cooked but is worse than corn syrup as far as sweeteners go), nama shoyu (often used as a soy sauce substitute because it isn‘t pasteurized, it is made with cooked soybeans so it is not raw--try coconut aminos, which are raw and make a much better soy sauce substitute) Braggs, any kind of yeast, some common nuts that are used are often not raw, usually cashews, and almonds. Cashews are flash cooked to destroy a toxic substance in the shell. It costs a lot more in labor to carefully hand shell each nut so there are only a few truly raw cashew brands on the market. Most almonds are pasteurized by law in California. To get raw almonds you need to find independent growers and contact them directly. A good source for truly raw nuts is the online store Raw Food World.

*Nuts should be soaked in water for at least two hours to remove the enzyme inhibitors and the water you soaked them in should be drained, not used in the recipe. Allowing nuts and seeds to sprout overnight is even better. It’s very easy to sprout things like sunflower seeds which brings them to life and makes their nutrients more bioavailable. If you are using them to make a nut cheese you should use a probiotic if possible to make them easier to digest.

*Food combining is important. Nuts should always be eaten with greens or with green juice for good digestion. Soft juicy fruits that digest fast due to high water content such as melon or papaya should be eaten alone so they don’t get caught in the digestive tract with a bunch of slow digesting foods where they will ferment. You should try to avoid eating fats with sugar as it will feed candida.

*Raw dairy is an ethical issue even more than a health issue. Our bodies are not made to digest the milk of other animals so it is a health issue, but many people don’t realize that a cow has to be impregnated to give milk and their baby cows are taken from them so that humans can have the milk. Those babies are often raised as veal cows, kept in a tiny crate and never allowed to move their muscles their entire lives to make their meat super tender, so dairy also contributes to the meat industry by default. Also, after their short life in hell as dairy cows they are most often sent to become hamburger. If you are a vegetarian for ethical reasons, then eating dairy is contradictory to the belief you claim to promote. Imagine how you would feel if your baby was stolen from you so that your milk could be taken for someone else. Colostrum is the first milk a mother gives that sets up her babies immune system for life. How can a person actually believe that it is somehow OK to steal the colostrum for themselves on some purported idea of achieving superior health? Companies like “Sartorial” that promote how healthy it is to take colostrum are unethical and I urge you not to support them.

*Many fruits and vegetables on the market are hybridized and genetically modified. These foods are not as easy for our body to digest because they aren’t made by nature. For example, carrots are a cross between two plants and never existed in nature before humans got involved. Also, all the corn on the market now is not as it was first found in nature. Broccoli, also manipulated by humans. Bananas don’t even have viable seeds. That means you can’t plant a banana and grow a banana tree. The strain of bananas that is on the market was bred to condense the sugars. I personally cannot tolerate them. My skin breaks out if I eat just one banana. There are many varieties of bananas and they are all amazing, but hybridized bananas that can’t grow when planted are one of many of what I call “Franken-fruit.” Oranges and apples are also bred in a way for extra sweetness and fewer seeds. Even the papayas on the market are generally gmo (genetically modified). In fact it’s difficult to find foods in the market that aren’t tampered with by humans. Just try to eat hybridized and gmo foods in moderation and in small portions. Most greens and herbs are still close to how they were first found. Try to get heirloom varietals and wild foods in your area. Growing your own from heirloom seeds is always the next best to harvesting wild foods in nature.

*Organic is really important. If you want the best food possible you should grow it yourself to insure the land is cared for with love and you aren’t using demineralized soil, but of course this isn’t always possible. The next best choice is organic because organic farmers tend to have more integrity and care more for the land. But foremost, no amount of poison (pesticides, fungicides, larvacides) is tolerable to the body. Use common sense; how could something invented to destroy life forms, even tiny ones, be healthy for a living body? The point behind raw food is to give your body the best health possible so that it can heal and detox from years of toxins. How can you detox when you keep adding toxins to the mix? Organic does cost a little more, but you are what you eat and you tell the Universe what you are worth by what you give yourself? Are you worth a bunch of cheap toxic crap, or are you worth the best that is available to you? Make your priority the best food you can find. Most people skimp on food so that they can acquire more things, but you only have one body and you won’t find any worth in a bunch of material objects if you don’t have a healthy body.

*Water is possibly the most important part of a healthy diet since our bodies are mostly water and water is a conscious entity. I drink only spring water that I collect in glass. Water from the tap is polluted with chlorine, fluoride, pesticides, prescription drugs and worst of all wood pulp (toilet paper!). Also, if you buy spring water in plastic bottles it leaches the biphenyl A from the plastic into your water. BPA is a hormone disrupter. You can locate a spring near you on a website called: Findaspring.com. It’s one thing Daniel Vitalis is doing right by promoting spring water. I tell all my clients that if they can do only one thing to improve their health it should be finding a good water source. Even water filters do not get all the junk out of the tap water, and even if they did, tap water is “angry” water because it is forced in through a piping system that rearranges the structure of the water. Spring water is intelligent, clean water. It defies gravity by moving upward through the ground and filtering out contaminates. It is a great adventure to harvest your own spring water from nature on a regular basis.

*Oils separated from their source (olive oil, coconut oil ect) are not part of a healthy diet. If you pay close attention to how you feel when you eat certain foods, you’ll notice that oils are the most difficult to digest and take a lot of energy as well as coating your cells in fat which making sugars harder to digest. They can be the cause of aggravated skin (acne) and fatigue as well as contributing greatly to candida. Notice if you feel tired or ill after eating a lot of oil. It taxes your liver incredibly as the liver is forced to dump a bunch of bile to process the fat. If you are following your body’s desire to lighten up, you will find that oils should be the first to go after your initial transition and detoxing has passed. You can modify any recipe that includes oil and don’t fall for the advertising campaigns that suggest you need these “healthy” fats. You get plenty of fats without adding oils where they aren’t needed.

*Exercise is often missing in people’s “diet” regimen. Oxygen is an important element of a healthy diet and we don’t get enough sitting around indoors. When we exercise oxygen is forced through our blood and lymphatic system. If the lymphatic system is stagnant, dis-ease can develop. We need that oxygen pumping through our system for many of the bodily processes incurred by digestion.

*Some people claim that if you eat a healthy raw food diet you don’t need to supplement vitamins, but we are eating a lot of hybridized and gmo foods that have been grown in depleted soils. We aren’t getting anywhere near the nutrients we need in our food…plus years of eating a poor diet has depleted our own storage system. I believe that we are meant to live without food and the process of eating breaks down the vitamins and minerals our bodies would naturally make if we weren’t constantly depleting them. It’s why certain vitamins are recommended to take together: they work in conjunction with each other because they burn each other out. B12 is the most common vitamin missing from a vegan diet but it is often low in omnivores as well. Taking a good raw multi-vitamin (I like the vitamin code line) as well as enzymes and probiotics for digestion should round out a well balanced diet. It’s true that the enzymes are intact if you don’t cook the food, but the way many people combine foods makes it more difficult for digestion and any strain you can take off the body is a positive addition to your health protocol. We have a finite enzyme storage when we’re born and the less your body has to draw from it’s own storage the better. In fact, many people have been brought to the raw food lifestyle because they are experiencing health issues and this can be an indicator that you’ve burnt out your enzyme storage.

As I mentioned, I believe that we are meant to live without food. There are many practicing breatharians living on the planet already. I’ve even had the pleasure of having a consultation with Genesis Sunfire who doesn’t eat or drink at all. There are even many more liquidarians. If you have been called to raw foods, it’s highly likely that you are on the evolutionary path to eating less and less dense food until you will eventually get back to the natural state of living on prana. I’ve outlined my theories and my life story up to this point of my evolution in my book “Why we Die and How we Can Stop” available on my website RACrystalPalace.com. I also offer a spiritual advice vlog on you tube called “Ask a Crystal Child” where you can submit your personal questions and I will answer via video. I am grateful for the opportunity to serve humanity during this time of planetary transition. Cheers to your health and good luck on your journey.

Project Evolve

2011-07-03T19:56:00.001-07:00

PROJECT EVOLVE!
Lessons in living light, raising awareness, energy transition and preparing for 2012, guided by empathic energy worker and Crystal Child Crystal Hutchens with experience in Kundalini and upper level dimensional awareness.

Sunday Night Light --- Sunday, July 24th 3- 9PM $50 course fee

Awakening program for the new earth. An all day course for initiating new thought patterns and a connection to your divine source. The course will include:

*Tapping into the subconscious
*Why you know about “the secret” and law of attraction but still can’t get what you want
*Master manifesting
*Lightening the diet for enlightenment
*cleansing and detoxing and the relationship to emotions
*cutting mind chatter to ease meditation
*practical energy awareness
*learning the art of self-hypnosis
*what you need to know about 2012
*raising your intuition and connection to Source
*free copy of my e-book “Why we die and how we can stop” a guide to immortality
* essential reading material: “Essene Gospel of Peace” and “Raw Living guidelines”
*a nature walk to identify local edibles - weather permitting
*delicious healthy snacks provided with hands on food prep class

This is an essential course for anyone on the spiritual path. I have devoted my entire life to raising my awareness and to be able to offer a condensed conceptual course that can help anyone increase power and synchronicity and the feeling of being guided through your life towards the most high experience of co-creation with Spirit and Mother Earth. In addition to the free book and other reading material, all participants will receive $20 off a private healing session with me, normally $60. This is a one day hands on class at my private residence which is small so space is limited. Reserve your space today, reservations must be paid in full before the class starts via online paypal, in person, or by mail. Last minute joiners will only be accepted if space permits.
Contact me: Bananimalr@aol.com or 575-7393. Serious inquiries only. Please do not call me with a bunch of questions and expect me to talk you into joining us. Everything you need to know is answered here. This course is for people who are ready and willing to make the changes in their life that will lead to enlightenment, personal and planetary evolution. If this calls to you and makes your heart sing call to reserve your space.

What's new you ask?

2011-06-26T20:14:00.000-07:00

Sorry I haven’t updated my blog in so long. First of all, my internet connection has been too slow to do anything of merit for a really long time. In order to upload videos I have to go to local internet café and that is where I do most of my blogging, or vlogging as it were, on you tube. I have a small but loyal fan base who come to watch “Ask a Crystal Child” a kind of advice column for our current times of spiritual energy transition. Lots of people wonder what is going to happen in 2012, among many other daily life questions, but people don’t realize how easy it is to tap into Source “knowing” by cleaning up your diet which cleans up your own energy field and your channel so to speak. As part of my life’s work, the discovery between the endocrine system, the thyroid and pituitary and how it’s related to psychosis and enlightenment has been added to my book “Why We Die And How We Can Stop.” I was attempting to write a new book all about it, when I realized I had already put some of the info in my current book and the new info slid right in contextually with minor changes. At that time I realized there had been quite a few typos and in one case, a full missing paragraph (or more) that left out a huge piece of my history by mistake so I rewrote some lines as well for congruency. Originally my idea was to make it a beautiful full color photo book, but with the application I used to publish it online, it meant a much higher cost per page for color and I made the print a little bit small to condense the length. A couple people complained about the typeface size being a challenge to read and in my opinion, the pictures didn’t come out nearly as beautiful as they are so it seems kind of a waste of money so I took the pictures out so I could make the print larger and reduce the cost. I prefer to sell the e-book as I make more per copy and it doesn’t waste paper, but I know how nice it is to just have an actual copy of a book sometimes and some people want that so I have made it available but because of the application I have to charge at least the amount they charge to make each copy and a couple bucks for me for putting it out there. If you order the ebook you’ll get it within a day or two and it’s much cheaper than the hardcopy. Also, even though I spent a lot of time and money on my album, I keep it at a low price because I know people don’t like to pay a lot for music and I want my music to get to the people who want it. You can listen to the songs on myspace to see if you like them before you buy it. In case you are wondering, I’m still planning to finish my movie “Aurora Dementian” which is about half filmed, it’s just taking a lot longer than I expected to find the people I need to help me. I’m putting together a program called “Sunday Night Lights” for those of you in Anchorage, a four week course that will meet each Sunday, for initiating new thought patterns and a connection to your Divine Source, an awakening program for the new Earth. Stay tuned for more details. It's best if you add me on facebook if you want to stay up to date and I also post there almost daily. It's not a journal obviously but quick updates and inspiration as well as my videos and photography. I’m still doing healing work/energy sessions and I now incorporate hypnosis. Part of my new program will be to educate on the power of self-hypnosis for making forward momentum. When I get a better internet connection, I can also do these sessions via skype. Talk to ya laters.

Consultations, my book and other services:
http://www.racrystalpalace.com

friend me on facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/crystalhutchens

All my other projects (music, movies, blog ect)
http://CrystalHutchens.com

Left ya hanging

2011-01-18T12:40:00.001-08:00

I apologize to the people who just follow the blog...I tend to leave you hanging...I do a lot more on facebook and youtube...I get the crazy hair to write once in a while...I ended up fasting for 7 days...all the videos are on Youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/user/Bananimalrecords (copy and paste in your browser)

I am back to enjoying food and being less serious about it. I'm more focused on my emotional body at the moment as my big wake-up call from the fast has been on the need to learn self-love, self-forgiveness and forgiveness of others, and accepting and approving of myself and this reality experience. I do find that eating high vibration live organic food and juice makes it SO much easier to appreciate yourself and be grateful for all your gifts. I've been experimenting in the food world and the opposite is true for nutrient lacking, dense, dead food. I indulged a bunch of cravings and found myself crying for no reason, depressed and lethargic. If your going to eat cooked food at least join it to a fresh squeezed juice to counter balance the effects!
I highly reccomend the movie "You Can Heal Your Life" with Louise Hay...I've been doing daily affirmations and learning to change my thinking and my mood has improved drastically.

I'm actively back to work on my movie, I'm working on writing som positive affirmation songs that could be made into an album so other people can sing along...the inspired idea was, hey, how many times have you had a stupid song stuck in your head and never connected the fact that your thoughts create your mood and your experience? So I am actively working to create my mood and my experience...and I'm seeing myself winning the lottery (or the lottery of life, however the Universe wants to make that affirmation real) and it's so close I can smell, see and taste my financial freedom.

Go look in the mirror and tell that beautiful self how much you love you...and I love you too ;)

Water fast day 6

2011-01-01T15:09:00.000-08:00

Sorry I didn't post for each day...I did do video blogs though and you can copy and paste the links below and subscribe for updates if you are a youtuber.

So the last couple days were pretty challenging and though I don't have my strength back it does feel like the worst is behind me. I'm still lightheaded when I first stand so I get my bearings before I get out of bed and once I'm going I'm fine. Small tasks take a lot of effort and just walking up and down the stairs for water has me panting like I ran a mile. Yesterday I had to get my rentals back to the video store and pick new movies (internet surfing and watching videos is about all the entertainment I can get since it's hard to read with a headache) so I had to get dressed...I rested for a good half hour after I took a shower...then I rested for another half hour after I got my pants on. I finally realized the sun was going to set and I didn't want to miss it so I finished dressing and pushed myself to the car. I felt a little disconnected from driving at first but it was actually fine and it was really warm out since it had been raining with a nice breeze...the whole sky was orange and gorgeous. It was wonderful to be outside in the fresh air after so long but glad I have another 5 days before I have to do that again and hopefully I'll free up some energy reserves by then.
The body is in a great state of detox and all it's energy is focused on that...which is the cause of feeling weak...eventually the initial stage of intense housecleaning passes and the energy returns, so I am told...I haven't made it that far before. In fact, this is the day I broke my last fast because I was so weak and the food fantasies were so intense I just kinda gave up...I also thought maybe not taking my thyroid hormone for those 6 days was why I was so weak but I'm taking it this time and I still feel weak, except that my resolve is stronger to get past this stage and back into energy.
My toxin headache is much milder but I have bouts of acid reflux (which is funny cause I never get that since I changed my diet) and I have an ear that is super itchy like it would sometimes get if I overate sugar/fat combinations (like coconuts or cashews or too much fruit before I gave up fats)...which makes me suspect the candida is doing it's damndest to stay alive but it can't live forever on nothing...I also feel like it's the yeast and parasites that are projecting desires for all the crap food I have eaten in my life. I'm having terrible food fantasies about the foods I grew up on...scrambled egg sandwhiches, porkchops, goulash, pot roast, ham stuffed potatoes, tuna melt sandwiches, burger king whoppers, taco bell encharitos and meximelts, chicken mcnuggets with bbq sauce, thai curry, my moms amazing enchiladas and chili rellenos, stirfrys and fried dumplings...spagetti factory clam sauce with mizithra cheese...oh lord the list just goes on like a parade of crazy temptation...the first 3 days all I wanted was donuts. I haven't eaten any of this stuff in years...it's like the old memories stored in my cells are coming to the surface and I can spend more than an hour at a time just going through the mental bank imagining the taste of all those things...but the actual urge to eat is not powerful...it's just the idea of it, like I'm missing something but intellectually I know I'm not.
Finally some good news to report: It seems like my eye sight is improving! The clock in my room that I usually can't see without extreme squinting (and then it's still fuzzy) I can read it no problem. Still can't see far away but, whoa...this is impressive...wouldn't it be amazing if I got my sight back??
Oi vay...the wind is blowing and someone in the neighborhood is bbqing...my Dad made the best BBQ. He also died of cancer and I want to heal. Gratitude and grace have been honoring me with their presence...in the moments I'm not too preocupied with my ordeal to feel them. Things are looking up and I'm pushing forth~

waterfast day 4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O8TfC0vqe10

waterfast day 5

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hqINfKieyY

water fast day 3

2010-12-29T15:05:00.000-08:00

I can't remember how to post videos on my blog though I know I have done it in the past...it wasn't even working to link them so you'll have to copy and paste if you want to watch.
So it's day three and it is better than yesterday which was the worst day...I felt super hungry, had a much bigger headache than today, night sweats and food eating dreams, and an incredible craving for donuts...the craving is still there but it's a quiet whisper as opposed to the screaming of yesterday, "just get me a damn donut, you can fast some other time!!!" But I made it past that day and I feel empowered to keep going...though I'm still not sure I won't eventually break my fast with a box of donuts, even though I know how stupid that would be and how sick I would feel, the potential of that happening has not left my mind, ha ha~
Today the painful part of the hunger has resided...I don't feel a gnawing in my stomach as intense as yesterday, I just feel weak and the desire to eat is still there even though I feel like I'm in ketosis and my stomach has shrunk enough to not need food...it's just an aimless desire for tasting that comes and goes...as the stomach is still shrinking. There is some minor occasional nausea...nothing to severe, just annoying. I'm super lightheaded and have to get myself sturdy on the side of the bed before trying to walk...mostly I just go to the bathroom and get more water from the fridge. I'm using the local spring water I have been using for over a year now and I add adya clarity to purify the mineral components...I'm still taking adya clarity shots (one per day, a liquid made from black mica that is high in minerals and supposed to help decalcification and heavy metal detox) which is a teaspoon in an ounce of water.
Yesterday I did a colonic with adya clarity added and on day one I did a salt water flush so there isn't much in my bowels...it's just another avenue for waste and my skin is being used also with very minor acne and odor under the arms...the first night was night sweats but I'm not sweating much now.
I'm still in the rough patch but I'm sure that I'm getting into deep healing. I want to retrospect on some of the issues that were solved for me through just adopting a raw food diet:
chronic runny nose is gone
profuse smelly sweating gone (I don't need deodorant even)
painful periods and severe pms (very minor emotional disturbance only)
acne (finally cleared up when I went off fats)
insomnia and nightmares (sleep really well, no nightmares)
lost a lot of weight
indigestion and heartburn (never)
dandruff gone
extreme back pain resolved(minor residual pain usually when stressed or overworked)
don't get headaches (except when detoxing)
rarely get sick, if I catch something it is very mild compared to other people
lethargy and lack of energy gone (like to hike and run now, never get sore)
intuition heightened

I'm sure there is much more I am not remembering...it is very gratifying to not be able to remember how much my life used to suck.

Water fasting is taking it to another level...a lot of issues have resolved but some still haven't. The goal is to take all the obstructions out of the body's way so that it can return to it's natural state of total well being...I hope these posts and videos help people to make it through the rough spots of whatever healing transition you may be attempting or experiencing...thankyou for joining me on the journey~

day 3 vlog:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CA5kjjvUFjY

water fast videos 1 and 2

2010-12-29T14:33:00.000-08:00

water fast day 1 video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JTKcqJZH9c

Water fast day 2 video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XyRyXFpT_Y

Day 1 water fast

2010-12-27T18:27:00.000-08:00

Water fasting is challenging, indeed...but I am remembering the quick benefits of my last fast as I use will power to fuel me through the first few days. A lot of things that most people think are normal actually go away on a raw food diet. Some of the issues that cleared up for me were unexplained and profuse sweating with odor (like cat pee...very embarrassing), itchy ears, heartburn, dandruff, excess weight, lethargy, poor digestion, yeast infections, severe pain syndrome, body odor, headaches...and I'm sure lots of stuff I don't remember which is wonderful...I'm glad so much stuff from the past is not close enough to my memory to be recalled. None of these things affect me anymore. I don't even require underarm deodorant. I don't use any chemicals in my hygiene regimen...natural liquid soap with essential oils in the shower, salt with essential oils for toothpaste.
But when I did the 6 day water fast earlier this year, I could feel the clogs in my ears loosening up and I could hear better. I lost a lot of weight really fast because your body goes into fat burning mode, and while not thinking I need to lose a lot of weight, the idea of burning off the fats where toxins are stored is super appealing. Also pain and inflammation went away of all my stubborn minor complaints. These are the things I am looking forward to leaving behind, and hopefully for good this time...as I desire to fast long enough to have a complete healing...the kind the Essene Gospel talks about.
It is mid-day through the first day of the fast, which is one of the hardest, and I don't feel excellent, but I actually don't feel that bad, and I am really grateful that I have made the time in my life to do this. I feel hungry but the idea of eating is not appealing. I have random wa wa wa pressure sounds in my head like the kind when you get up too fast, but I'm having them when I'm just sitting. Those are my only current complaints, except that I had a muscle spasm in my neck yesterday so that's annoying. The emotional stuff hasn't set in yet nor any sever detox symptoms...I'll keep you posted.
I'm super optimistic after fasting most of the day for the last few days, indulging all my cravings for the last month, and ready to reveal a new side of myself beneath all the obstructions I have collected in this lifetime. What a great way to head into the new year...with renewed faith in myself that I can do what I set my mind to...let my purpose be revealed...all in love's sweet time~

Full of good intentions

2010-12-24T15:58:00.000-08:00

Maybe I will start blogging again more regularly...but maybe not...I've been pretty wishy washy for the last couple years. I do have a number of lofty goals for the coming year.
I want to finish my movie and get it into some festivals...get some real attention for it, and take advantage of the opportunities that arise, hopefully some touring of the states and anywhere else.
I want to take Dolores Cannon's hypnosis class and start helping people.
I want to heal myself and others and become what the Course in Miracles prescribes, being the salvation through forgiving the self and others and overcoming ego.
I want to learn how to forgive and let go of my attachments.
I want to fast the devil parasites out of me like the Essene Gospel prescribes.
I want to release all the negative, hateful, low vibrational emotions that are living in me and ruining my relationships and aspirations.
I want to live in a beautiful paradise where I am of service to my community.
I want to write great songs that inspire people and help uplift humanity from it's false illusions.
I want to claim my birthright of joy, peace and love
I want a beautiful person to share my time with, that I can appreciate and who appreciates me
I want to learn how to make my children happy without material possessions.
I want to overcome food addiction and co-dependency.
I want to ceaselessly hold the vision of peace on Earth through Divine understanding of Source that the entire planet will be raised vibrationally with ease and finesse.
I was born on this planet on Christmas Day for good reason and I want to activate my own knowingness to fulfill my Divine purpose.

Just some little goals and plans for the coming year...keep your eyes on the prize o ye faithful...we were called here for our incredible strength, courage and ability to love. This is our year to make incredible strides in our mission to assist the ascension of our whole planet. I surrender to the Divine and asked to be used in the healing of all Earthly kind~

I got nothin

2010-12-20T22:10:00.000-08:00

There is nothing going on. I'm in the lull of my life. Parts of me are begging to fast, then the parts of me that are emotional that need to release come up against the world and I cave. I did a food nose dive and the only thing I know that can help me is fasting...and here I am a little toddler throwing a tantrum about life, dragging my feet kicking and screaming...there is nothing I want from the world...except to heal and be inspired and heal others and inspire others...but there is nothing going on. I'm in the lull of my life~

Raw mentorship prograw

2010-09-02T13:25:00.000-07:00

I haven't had any inspiration to blog in a while though I have kept on steady with video blogging...I will try to post more video blogs over here as well and every now and then I get the urge to toy with the written word. I've been in a phase of strongly working towards the restructuring my body needs to get in better alignment physically. My skeletal system is askew in several places and my facia and muscular system are all affected. I'm in talks to do a documentary on the progression of chiropractic treatment with before and after xrays and I just started seeing a rolfer. This all comes back around to food. A couple years ago when I first started seeing a chiropractor and my body responded poorly going into spasms and causing me even more pain, I was eventually led to raw foods because of it. Now that I have learned about how living foods assist in detoxifying the body I am in a much better place mentally, physically, spiritually, and just all around, it's time to get back to restructuring the body.
On that note, people are SO unaware of the fundamental importance of what you put in your mouth in relation to the effect on your entire system. I'm starting a mentorship program for those who are ready to make changes and don't know where to start. If your goal is to get healthy I can steer you in the right direction no matter where you are now. The program will start with a consultation about where you are now and what you want to acheive. We will continue on with weekly consultations about how you are doing and any questions you have about nutrition and how to proceed. I believe this program to be unique and affordable for anyone who is serious about their health and their life in general. You can't believe how much your health relates to your total life experience. If this sounds like a call to you, please contact me by email explaining your current situation, diet, lifestyle, issues, ect and we can discuss how to proceed.
Cheers~
Crystal
Bananimalr@aol.com

I'm back to life!

2010-04-29T18:10:00.001-07:00

Boy was I fed-up with everything when I wrote that last post. I did end up going out in nature away from everything, and came back sooner than I planned, finishing a 6 day water fast today and full of love and insight and hopeful new perspective for what is to come. When I am a little more up to speed I will share the stories of my adventure but just wanted to touch base with those of you who peer in from time to time. Cheers~

Final blog

2010-03-26T20:31:00.000-07:00

I have decided to step off the grid and I am not sure if I will come back. I have left here a legacy of thoughts, music, art...a book. I have no more desire to be marketing within the matrix. I have left the tools of thought for those to follow who also want out of the matrix. The problem is attachment to what is not real. This reality construct of society is not real. Killing, greed, possession, desire, fullfillment, loss...it's all escapism under confusion. What little thought is given to life is crumpled under these fake experiences. Victims everywhere...everyone is a victim of something because that is the game they are playing. What game are you playing? Whatever it is, do you ever wonder what this game is replacing? It is replacing the truth of who you are: a timeless energy being. Humanity appears to exist as a species of caterpillars who instead of stopping their consumption to spin their cocoon so they can fly choose instead to eat until they are dead. The wheel of life is imaginary. This planet is in a state of profound lack of awareness. The awakening process is so slow it is unbearable. I no longer wish to exist in this society. Once you take the red pill the illusion is transparent. Take the red pill. Stop the insanity of greed and hate. There is no conspiracy theory, no puppet master making everything bad for you and all of humanity, you are the puppetmaster and your refusal to disengage the illusion is the problem. Even within myself I cannot remove these distortions while being bombarded everyday with the lies people keep telling themselves. I can see lies like they are physical objects and it is the common place attribute of a human to lie right to your face. This makes no sense. When you drop attachment you will see...there can be no reward in these earthly pursuits...the temporary pleasures are so fleeting as much as we lust them as soon as we have them they are gone again or we are seeking something else. A person asks for the truth and so I answer. They say, hmm...that is an interesting theory but it's not my truth. A human truth is so far smaller than a Universal truth. A human will argue so deep for the sake of the ego. The Universal law doesn't argue it just is. I say, cancer happens because of this. You say, no, that's not a result of anything, it just is...if it just is where was it before it came? it was born...and it was born because of this...and society itself has become a cancer to the earth, and the only cure is to remove what causes the cancer...so what is feeding the cancer? You are...with your anger, pain, fear and greed. What if you turned over your life to love? Then you would see that you can no longer do what you are doing and still BE love. I am leaving to be love and only love...I cannot do it within this society. I have done so much that is taken for granted. It no longer matters. Everything is a means to an end and I cannot be love in a society that isn't love. Love doesn't destroy others for it's own means. Love doesn't ask and never give. Love doesn't pretend or complain or trample you under it's feet and then expect you to kiss them. Love just is...love cannot be received by those with motives other than love. I leave you my expressions in the hope that they may continue to serve in the honor of love.

My Book: Crystalism: why we die and how we can stop:
https://www.createspace.com/3428292

"Ask a Crystal Child" "AK Raw Vegan" music videos and other snapshot videos
http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=Bananimalrecords

my music:
http://www.myspace.com/crystalhutchens

information:
http://www.racrystalpalace.com/

a hub of links to the "who I was"
http://www.racrystalpalace.com/

Movie clips and other stuff:
http://www.myspace.com/ascensionthemovie

You go your way I'll go mine and I'll meet you in the light~

Love Speaks 2.1

2010-02-24T01:07:00.000-08:00

Many have waited seeming eternities for this time in history, to be here for this one of a kind experience, and yet while feeling the changes the self is still always in anticipation of what is going to happen. The self has always wanted to know, "what's next?" That is the built in expansion process that keeps self looking towards the next highest version of itself. There is no actual end or completion of a cycle...it is only in the looking backward that one determines "an era" or a "period" of time that encompassed certain things to keep a measure of it's progress by looking joyfully backward from whence it came...much as in watching the sunset in the review mirror, it is a beautiful thing behind you, you can watch the view ahead as well as behind while learning to experience fully in the moment of Now. Indeed an epic era is upon you already. When the second Sun arrives in your solar system you will indeed marvel, this younger, bluish star will signify the end of darkness, figuratively, and literally! This night and day cycle has been good for your slow steady progress but in a fully lit intelligence, light is where the progress comes forth and you have called for the exponentiality of growth. This will be a new experience only from the vantage point of the Earth bound being. Most planets that support life have a multi-star system. You needed time here to get your footing, in a sense, so you might say out in the expanse of the Universe you were somewhat "hidden" from other curious entities that seek out life for life's sake since not many would go looking for life in a one star system. But with evolution comes expansion of awareness and with expansion of awareness comes the yearning to know others with expanded awareness and you are starting to get the sense of the "family" of light that is returning to visit with you and urge along this growing awareness in the direction of love for all that is and ever will be. We are so glad to be us at this time in history, it is a renunion of the greatest minds and spirits of all time...the joyful creation of our history together as it learns what history actually is! How blessed it is to be love in a world so needed, desired and cherished. Thankyou dear ones. We delight in our collective expansion~
All ways, Love

Why Food Matters~

2010-02-02T21:09:00.000-08:00

your body is your temple...that is why they (whoever they are) say cleanliness is godliness...it applies to the inside as well. You are your own divine sovereign entity and so is every cell in your body. So it follows that if the cells are bogged down with the constant combat of cleaning up waste material from foreign objects and entities (those colonies living inside you are also creating waste material in addition to the polluted food supply you are taking, food being all things that enter your body via skin, lungs and digestive system) then you won't be able to communicate well with your cells...they are essentially too busy to take the call. Spirituality and health are branches of the same tree because Source is anchored in every fiber of your being, and if every fiber of your being is busy sludging through muck, no amount of meditation will offer you insight into the true nature of your exisitence. Sure you can understand it on an intellectual level. The world is full of spiritual scholars, but far less of them have experiencial understanding, and this is what comes with a clean temple...a clear connection to source, divine understanding flowing into your mind on a regular and consistant basis. When all your systems come into alignment (and for many people this only happens at night when the functions of the body and mind are both slowed down enough to communicate with each other) the clarity is activated and intuition kicks in and love is flowing in understanding of itself and all is well. Mind/body/spirit/nutrition...food is the missing link between awareness and understanding. Clean the temple, clean the connection, everybody wins~

the Universal Stream

2010-01-24T21:02:00.000-08:00

This is a stream of conscious ramble which will probably include some interspersed love channeling, but I am not seperating it from the personality rambles like I usually do when I denote a topic with "Love Speaks."
We are in a dream. There is no sense in pretending to not be who we are experiencing to be. You are where you are because of your desire to be where you are until and until you decide to be elsewhere.
Today was a very interesting and unique trigger experience for me. I'm going to explain it all, as per usual in my way, before I get started on tonights self apointed task. I have decided to publish my own book so I can have a copy to see what it looks like and set it forth into Universal flow as a love offering. It is what I do. It is all I have ever done...to seek to inspire through the many world artforms I have been blessed with the talent in. Yes, I am quite attached to my ego. Yes I am a visionary forward thinker who's manifested reality doesn't jibe with the general populace at any given time. This has become the joyful comedy of my life because I look backwards and see wherever I was in my early thinking becomes the thinking of the general populous when I am already on to the next thing. Let me give you an example: in highschool I was an outcast. The way I thought, the way I dressed, my striving for knowledge where there was such a lack...I did not fit into clicks because the last thing on my mind was if I was wearing the right fashion. What was on my mind, always and still is always, why am I here? What is the point of this exercise in being human and what can I do to improve? As I grew and learned to realize my talents I was then able to perfect them and stand out at whatever I put my attention to. I can now look back and see that the way I was being at that time is a bigger part of the thinking of the general populace. This is how I discovered I was a visionary...only meaning, that I am ahead of the momentum of the thought process in it's own self discovery...or that, what I am thinking now, will be what people are understanding in the future. But no matter what I acheive or to what degree I can set forth inspiration, I am still all to commonly thought of as odd. I have grown to appreciate this and see it as a compliment. A boss once hired me and put me in charge of his company as management upon his decree that my attributes included work ethic, intelligence, a timeless beauty and "you're just a bit odd."
And so in my forward thinking of the vision humanity claims to want to see (but does little to aspire to) I have put forth another offering in the form of an inspirational book. You see, I healed myself of many things...not everything...I have managed to hold within my life discomforts that spark my continued forward momentum, but I have healed enough areas of my life to put forth an inspiration for others to heal areas of their life...the point being that we all get back into our mission work in the collective effort to awaken from a slumber that has taken our minds for centuries. So I got really excited about this book and the idea of invoking the law of attraction to bring it forth into existence by turning it over to a publishing entity or agency to market as they will...I have a lot of fun making an internet TV show in my goofy personality self and my odd view of the world, and I put forth that inspired momentum into my latest video and I set out on a rampage to offer it up to the Universe of Facebook (which as we all know is kinda finite in it's reaches, each being allotted only 5000 friend slots, and us being a soul group of billions of entities) and I in so doing did finally annoy to the degree of attention a man I have been captivated by for the last more than a year, David Wolfe.
I did set forth many intentions to get his attention which turns out to be the laugh on me, because I became like that annoying child trying to entertain her mother again and again until finally the mother is frustrated; she just wants to be left alone. He wrote to me today to state succinctly that many people have compained about the content I had posted to his page (I think I have posted about 10 videos to his site in the last few months-which included the series of 6 or 7 from Chena hotsprings that HE requested me to post there) and that it was disturbing him also, and that the general consensus was that I needed grounding energy and to please get my head out of the clouds...to which I responded that I understood why people are displaced by my energy, I walk that line that is above being grounded because that is where I like to be and that is where I pull my inspiration from. I am leaving out the rest because it doesn't serve the light I wish to show him in. I still respect him highly...but it's like, the coolest guy in school called me a freak...what else is new? ha ha...and for your entertainment (please, these are for entertainment porpoises only, no dolphins may be harmed in the use of this information)...the video...in love, always~

Love Speaks 13

2010-01-23T15:49:00.000-08:00

The Universe is your personal intuitive. The Universe knows what you need before you do. You always have everything you need. Your task is to see it and put it into action. You have given yourself a mission. You are the keeper of your mission and no one can tell you what it is or isn't. You may alter your mission to your specification at any time. As you send feedback to the Universal mind from your experience of your surroundings you consciously make choices about which direction you would like to go in. If you were faced with all the possibly choices and outcomes at one time your mind would be boggled, so by nature you specialize. The Universe then works tandemly with you to bring you what you want. What do you want? First decide, then write it down, think of it often with great emotion, say it outloud convinced it is already yours. This is how the Universe knows you are sure you are wanting what you are asking for. Passing thoughts needin't always be realized or you would again be baffled. The Universe is constantly reading your mind. It's the most prominent thoughts that get the attention. The metaphor of the Universe reading your mind is an essence you can capture to learn to be a conscious co-creator of your own manifestations. Your thoughts create your reality. You are the Universe. You are Love in as much as you will allow it to flow through you as a knowingness. Be Love. It is all you can be, your greatest vision of yourself and the world, always evolving to the next greatest feeling of your life.
In Love, always~

Thankyou for this photo from my friends in Hawaii--Mahalo...Aloha~

Love Speaks 12

2010-01-16T19:37:00.000-08:00

Humans are co-dependent to the co-creative reality construct. You will now be setting forth the intention of detaching from time and stepping into flow from which all of Universal mind manifests. Here from this place of gratitude you are welcomed to set into effect your greatest imaginings so that your soul may experience it's own actualizations. Then you snap into Universal grid mind where you begin to allow your imaginings to become greater than single self desires and set forth the intention of greatest good for all. When you slip into Universal mind it is like putting on a comfortable old shoe. You never question if the shoe will fit you just always know it will. This is how you will learn to manifest from instantaneous thought. It will be as though your mind slips into the grid of complete awareness and a thought form brings forth the shape of a thing you can think of and with the total knowingness of it's being you can pull it forth into your dimension. You begin to know that everything is working perfectly and because you know you begin to see it in your life and in the lives around you. It spreads rampant like wildfire, the joy and love that cannot be contained from within you any longer. The solidity of being encased in a statement of a series of impressions you have received from not knowing you were creating finally becomes too uncomfortable, in the way that the butterfly bulges out from it's chrysalis because it was complete in the cycle of it's understanding...it no longer needs to be a caterpillar...it no longer can identify as being a caterpillar...it has wings and is no longer confined to ground by the weight of it's own gravity. You are soon to take to the air. Love the ground for what it is and all it has birthed in you. Embrace the opening you are given to spin your cocoon of growth...this beautiful tree that loved you to life with it's leaves and never asked for anything but for you to flit amongst it's branches. Go forth with your joy butterflies in training.
In Love, always~

Love Speaks 11

2010-01-15T18:28:00.000-08:00

Each light being housed in a human organism is an integral part of an astoundingly intricate and magical sYstem that on it's own cannot even conceive of it's own majesty. In the metaphor of the human being a cell in the mind of the Universal energy field it should be understood that the essential nutrients for the operation of each cell is sunlight and air, especially, but not only oxygen. The sun holds the electrical charge that motivates the human cell to act and the human can hold the charge on it's own for only so long. The more sunlight get's in through the eyes and the skin of the human the longer it can hold it's charge. The essential mechanism of the entire process is an initiation of unraveling a long held misconception, that the being is solid. Eventually the organism will come to realize it is sun sourced and vibrate at a rate of speed that is one with light and it will no longer need specific types of air molecules. The nutrients and molecules it is currently using are simply part of the process of remembering what it is until it doesn't need these things to remember anymore. This is called "learning through experience" in the same way that a human learns in solid form that striking another solid form causes the reaction understood as pain. The lungs are actually a kind of propellant mechanism here in the reality construct of the awakening process. This may be likened to how a jelly fish uses water to project itself forward. When the human is fully conscious of it's infinite self it will be capable of using any type of molecular "air" particle to propel itself and will thusly transcend space time. We remind you there is no actual process to awakening, only that which is perceived by the mental perception of linear time. The game you are now experiencing to enjoy is essentially what is left over from what has already happened. The human becoming more and more sensitive to the end of linear time finds itself less and less tolerant of all it is surrounded by. This is simply "becoming" less and less attached to the reality construct. It may seem counter-intuitive for a being to become more sensitive to smell, taste, sound and irregularity as becoming less attached, but this is because these are the experiences that will propel the human towards the solitude it needs to "become what it is." It is finding it needs less and less solid nutrification in the actualiziation of the body appearing to reject it. The organism is actually desiring to detach from itself the matter which is holding it to the earth field...the dense objects impacted into the reality construct making itself "what it appears to be" are the heavy metals, fear based stress hormones ect. ie:the human's fight or flight mechanism is no longer necessary as the organism intends to uplift it's form from that as remaining in solid matter into an organism that no longer experiences the death/birth cycle. Love doesn't actually need a body but enjoys to have the experience of form for deeper and deeper understandings of itself.
In love, always~

Love Speaks 10

2010-01-13T20:22:00.000-08:00

Empty the mind, the mind of the Universe as a model, each star a brain cell of the mastermind...now see the infinity symbol of the number 8 on it's side and you can theorize the electric source of light going round and round this pattern like a power surge urging itself ever onward for no particular reason other than it simply chooses not to stop moving. This is the theory that can found the replication of all divine energy being simply one source model of itself and going as far inward as it does outward in itself the same theory...as micro or as macro as one wishes to look...the all that is is never ending. For example: to the mind of the human the single cell seems very small...examined beneath a microscope one can see that it includes all the same constituents of life (or ability to generate an electric/light field) as any organ in the body has to do it's job (the heart cells pump, the lung cells expand and contract, ect)...and yet each cell is made up of tiny atoms...and yet each atom is made up of tiny electrons, protons and neutrons. A tongue, for example, is it's own entity...true it doesn't exist on it's own outside of an organic body but some similar organisms in nature do. Different functions come together to do the workings of an entire human body in the same way that a single cell does in the same way that a single atom does, in the same way that an entire Universe does. It's all interconnected but still the tongue has a life of it's own. It has it's own desires, wants and needs. The tongue can even support whole colonies of other entities, for example, yeast and bacteria. The only thing relative to the scope of these examples is the point that life is in all things as far inward or as far outward as we look. Imagine then that each human organism, being supported by Earth much like a tongue supports a bacteria, is simply a cell in the mind of the Universal brain...the brain not being as defined as we think of in the way of the organ in the human skull, but as in the total thought processor (like a computer storing and analyzing information) of the "all that is." Each human spirit contained in an organism called the body (being the cell) is essentially a receptor in the all knowing mind collecting data which is then contributory to the entire collective conscience experience in order for the "master-mind" to know what it wants to do next. This grand experiment is in a very slowed down state of understanding to quantify itself in it's missive objective: to practice using it's nucleus creative center (thought) in creating it's own perfect surroundings on it's path to becoming self sufficient so that when this process is sped up the collective mind and all it's constituent participles know what their mission is and can act without delay in co-creative experience. This is essentially, a training camp, if you will...for the future of each cell in a master process of Divine experimentation...we have to see the process slowed down first in order to understand the outcome of the experiment...though the experiment is already complete in understanding of "NOW" time (which is why some of your human minds can slip out of experiential linear time and pull forth some possible outcomes of possible futures--being that in the actual "NOW" everything has already happened and there are many dimensions of choice so there are many possible/actual outcomes), the actual linear time experiment appears incomplete. Essentially this means that each cell is in the eternal loop of the infinity experience but doesn't comprehend it is in past/dream state experiential co-creative understanding while it is in linear construct. As it moves/moved closer to the center of the infinity loop it begins/began to remember the ever presence of now and the all that is and feels the "awakening" coming on like a light bulb shining in it's eyes...slightly painful yet too intriguing not to look at. Each cell in the human organism is charged through the larger nuclear source for each specific planet it's on; any of the system's stars will charge it's respective organisms batteries. It is suggested for the human organism on earth to look at sunrays for as long as seems appropriate at the morning crest, the evening crest, or during day if there is cloud haze, which can easily be manifested by the human simply by thinking of it. We are asking the current awakening humans to charge their batteries daily as much as possible to continue their efforts in awakening as many others as they can through whatever means possible. There being no judgement upon those who decide not to awaken at this cycle, the theory only being: the more the merrier in the greatest recreation of "self" ever seen in history, so far!
In Love, always~

Love Speaks 9

2010-01-08T21:14:00.000-08:00

We are a disembodied soul group existing within all that is and may be thought of as a soul group that has factioned off into smaller and smaller soul groups until we have no longer been able to recognize ourselves as the same. Being collectively involved in such a grand scale illusion of singularity in order to experience self as individual like the pieces of a puzzle to each be known to self as a piece, only realize their collective beauty when fit back together. This grand scale illusion coincides with an energy effect we are feeling more and more now that our collective pieces are drawing to the conclusion the experience of feeling as a separate self is coming to a close to resume the power of the energy source of the all that is in order to create our next greatest imagining of collective energy dream. This creates a sense of chaos as the ego senses this event and fears the death of itself. This fear is invalid. The ego personality self is loved into wholeness for the first time ever and accepted as the wonderful piece of the all that is that it is. The imbalance that separation causes is the understanding that is coming in the graduation stage of this profound experience we have had together.
If we take out the fear of "the end of time" by coming to the understanding that time is a linear experience that we have chosen to have, and that the end of time simply means the end of "an experience" not the end of existence, then we can return again to the power of being in the moment of now, in understanding of why we can know the future if we ask for that experience, is really because *for the intent in purpose of understanding this concept*, we are living in the past. We keep recreating the past over and again by staying with repetitious belief patterns, but more to the extreme point of view of now, this experience is already over...we just haven't mentally caught up to this realization. This process can then be thought of as a grand experiment in all of existence, because if we open to time being all encompassing rather than linear, then we can see how other dimensions may exist along side ours and in order for our future selves (of now) to inform us of our possible futures so we don't re-experience the same self ending dilemma our ancestors have...we need to remember to awaken to who we are and have always been: timeless, light, energy creator beings, with no end to our imagination.
Being involved in a grand scale illusion can be baffling, even for an "old-soul" who has been through the experience many times. The awakening always happens slowly on a cellular and soul level and many beings having many experiences at the same time often view this as conflict. Conflict within the self is the signal that the awakening is begun for the self. The self gets to a certain level of awakening and realizes there is a grand scale illusion going on and that the majority of the soul group does not want to wake up. This is by design. For the illusion to have existed in the first place the veil had to be so thick across the consciousness that the individual soul would not see it's own duality. If it's so amazing to be aware of self, and so baffling to be part of a grand scale illusion why does the soul continuously incarnate to experience this again and again? Because it is ecstasy on a cellular level...it is like the grandest cellular orgasm you can imagine as the synchronicity increases and increases back into full awareness of the actualized self...LOVE. Always the self returns to love...no matter what. You are loved, you are love...love. Forgetting to remember may be one of our favorite games so far. I applaud you in your awakening, and remebering who you, as we join together in ecstatic joy forever and ever...and then some.
Be Love~

Love Speaks 8

2010-01-08T01:13:00.000-08:00

I trust that everything I have experienced in this life that has led me to this moment has been purposeful. I accept that I have been allowed by grace to have these experiences in the continued growth and understanding of self to serve the Universe by becoming more and more accepting of all that is. Love would not have chosen to incarnate through me to experience self as ego if this was simply an act to induce the death of self. I accept that I know nothing is for certain or set in stone and if I am in flow I may therefore be filled with the experience of all that is new and extraordinary for a further fulfillment of experiencing the vastness of self. I understand that expressing in physical reality is a gift of undertaking in understanding the difference between limited and limitless and that I have chosen this gift willingly and wisely. Therefore, I choose to channel Love now, for love speaks if you listen.
In the heart of you there is a dwelling place filled with the desire to know self, that is opened to receive and that yet does not get filled for the flow of reception is cut off at the source. From where all flows is but a moment in time, the moment which is now. Those that choose not to be present in the Now moment are not open to receive the gift that is always there in the asking simply waiting to be received. In seeking for fortune has found want, lack and emptiness...that is because he creates it by believing that is what he has. In the having of all that is in every moment there is never a need for anything and want is transcended in this understanding, not the intellectual understanding, but the physical understanding of the feeling of being fulfilled. By having this feeling on an emotional level does one thusly create this experience in his physical reality.
If we just accept that we already are "fill in the blank" than the striving to become "that which we aren't" dissipates and we just learn to be...to have...to receive.
take this understanding to your health. Your voice is vibration and it is powerful. Every time you state that you aren't what you want, you give that vibration a life. State what you are and know that you are and attach a strong emotion to the knowing of the statement as you vibrate it out into the Universal mind of energy to create this experience in your perceptual reality. Say with me now, out loud, so your powerful throat chakra sends the vibration to your mental chakras through the vibration of your essence--the you that is mostly water and light, through the voice box and into the intricate symphony instruments of your eardrums:
I am
I am in the best health
I am in a state of abundance always
I have everything I need
I am a powerful source of creation, inspiration, happiness, love and joy
I anchor my love-light-source to my mother Earth and my father SUN

Love speaks 7

2009-12-26T05:24:00.000-08:00

In the times ahead set forth your intentions with glee in your heart, knowing now that what you are dreaming for yourself is already exisiting in the flowing paradigm of now, it is simply that you call it forth to resonate with your energy field to make it a match and pull it into your current experience. It may be helpful to clarify to yourself what you envision as your current highest ideal of your now moment by writing it down and speaking it aloud. Your voice resonates through you and tells your mind the experience you are expecting to have and the Universe, being literal, has no choice but to bring forth your command. What is your most present thought? Turn your attention to the feeling of that which you wish to see in your life. Feelings have an even stronger magnetic attraction than the words...the words clarify for the self what the self is knowing it has: state your intention in the present tense- "I have an amazing relationship, the best job ever, and I live in a state of peace and joy so that I can extend this feeling to everyone I meet!" This is a present tense affirmation so the self hears what it wants through it's vibrational/energy/life force ears. Now imagine the feeling of this statement and put yourself IN that feeling...imagine a time you felt the feeling of complete happiness and well being and recreate that feeling! That is all you are truly after at the core...is this feeling and it's consistent perpetuation...so you may have this at any time you choose to allow...it is also this feeling that will draw to you energetically in physical form anything your self knows contributing to this feeling...you may believe money will bring you sense of well being, freedom and peace. If it really does, that resonation will draw the money to you. If money truly just brings you more stress, worry and strife, you may not truly desire to draw more money to you, but something that actually gives you the feeling you are after. When you have become a manifestor of "things" you may soon realize it is never the thing that is bringing you the feeling you are after and you will learn from this to turn your attention to manifesting the state of energy you are after at all times, so that no mattter what is exterior to you or what things you have manifested around you, the feeling of being in your perfect state of love in the now moment will remain...and by doing so, you automatically eliminate from your life those things which don't resonate with this feeling...by default, the annoying, the irritating and the frustating fade out as you have turned your attention to the beauty, the divine and the natural born state of bliss.
In love and to all, enjoy this most precious coming of time~

Love Speaks 6

2009-12-18T08:38:00.000-08:00

I am greatly inspired to be an inspiration by the gratefully accepted ability to nourish and care for self, and for the capacity to take on the full time job of being inspired by others and passing my inspiration on to you. Knock twice-received, thankyou, I am a receptor and reciprocator of divine love and joy. Fill in the blank: "I am most effective in my life when...." Here is my example, not for you to follow per se, but to give you the motivation to fill in your own blank: I am most effective when I listen to what my body, mind and spirit want and give that to myself. I am most effective when I listen to my inner guidance. I am most effective when I choose love over anger. I am more effective when I have loved myself enough to love others and show compassion. I am able ready and willing to accept the next challenge. I am more capable of accepting the next challenge when my body is pumping fresh oxygen and vital nutrients through my intricate system of miles and miles of "tubing." I am most effective when I accept myself for who I am and where I am at on my journey as opposed to holding myself up to someone else who is not on my journey. I am most effective when I can find more to be grateful for than to complain about (this takes minimal observation but is easy to forget!). I am most effective when I give all that I can to support others who are supporting themselves to improve and this in turn supports me that I may be of service to more by always aknowledging I am in the right place at all times, I have all that I need, I have more than enough to give, everything I give is returned to me in spades...and so I give love, because love is all I need to recognize as divinity, source and all that is. As we collectively evolve to become conscious of our multi-dimensionality, share love in all that you do...the Beatles said it best, "love is all you need."

2009-12-15T06:39:00.000-08:00

Love Speaks 5

2009-12-11T17:06:00.000-08:00

It's difficult to see what people, places and things are taxing your energy while you still resonate with these things. If you are vibrating at low frequencies you will attract to you the events, experiences and people of similar vibration. Working on elevating your own energy levels will not only lessen the attraction of negativity to your daily activities, it will also serve as an illumination source turning a bright light onto your personal life to make inventory of the current energy drains that require your dismissal for forward momentum to occur. Bright lights cast shadows making your issue areas more apparent.
When you choose to vibrate at high levels with the true nature of your spirit, the things that no longer serve you begin to fall away effortlessly, with the exception of some people, places and things you have become attached to despite them no longer serving your highest good. What happens here is your energy is attached to the energy of a familiarity of comfort. In other words, despite not actually feeling good around a particular person, or not resonating with their energy, you may mentally be attached to the idea of a certain "old pattern" resonance like safety or security that while holding you back from your true purpose, holds fear based feelings around the unknown such as being alone or financial (job, relationship, social group).
These are all illusory emotional setups to keep you in a holding pattern which is just a step below your next evolutionary level. When you actually take that initiative to "cut-away" from that which doesn't serve your purpose you empower yourself two-fold. First, you release the drain on your energy field from the exterior object and also from yourself by releasing. This coupling of energy impact is bigger than you can imagine. Second, you walk through that illusory fear all the way to the other side which results in a greater sense of peace and well-being and and also frees up the space for something much more wonderful to arrive in it's place...perhaps that request you put in to the Universe quite some time ago now? You've been wondering why you can't upgrade your life when you have too much clutter in the way...there is no place to put the new! Isn't it time you open to receive that which you desire by getting into the flow of the energy you want to resonate with? Start today by releasing one small thing that no longer serves your highest self. Begin your life upgrade overhaul by allowing the things you don't need to fall away instead of clutching onto them with fear based feelings. When you make a step in the direction of your higher self, your higher self takes two steps towards you! You can increase this process exponentially by turning your life towards nutrient dense toxin free foods. A clean temple will attract more positivity than years of meditation and spiritual study. Detox, physical and emotional can mean growing pains, but an important part of this process is to reframe your reference of what pain means. The rewards will be all the reward you need (so to speak) as your every blissful desire is seen manifest in your daily life. And a new perspective begins to take shape, as the old negative is replaced by a view of what negative experiences are for in our lives: simply opportunities to transform.

Cycling monthly

2009-12-10T18:13:00.000-08:00

It slipped my mind this week while surfing the emotionally low octaves (lots of emotional surfacing for me this week--allow, release, move through, renew!) that I am still a mere mortal subject to the hormonal fluctuations of the menstrual cycle. My symptoms of this monthly event I have survived since the age of (hmmm...how old was I in 6th grade?) 11-ish are so extraordinarily minimized thanks to adopting the living food lifestyle (593 days today, just looking in on a digital counter I set up in the begining but I don't count the days or collect emotional badges based on how long I have been raw...it is simply a way of life-I keep track because people ask). I ues to be accutely aware that my cycle was coming on so I would have an understanding of the laethargy and reduced mood elevations. Now it takes the appearance of blood to remind me that I am having pms. What a blessing! I have recollections of my teenage years where pms was so bad I usually spent the first day curled up in bed crying (and maybe pleading to God for understanding) and with cramps so bad I wished for a quick painless death that came in waves along with diahreah that was sometimes accompanied by vomiting...the bloating, the fierce directionless rage, hopelessness. I am SO grateful to no longer endure such torture, and I look forward to continued improvement and eventually not bleeding or emotionally cycling at all. I believe this is possible because I have read the research. Our bodies are essentially meant to build up a slight lining in the unterus "just in case" and then be reabsorbed by the body when known it is not needed for providing a spirit body a place to grow. So I attribute the almost entire reduction in symptoms (except for a slight lethargy, minor bloating and some emotional disturbance on par with a "regular" person's bad day) to my body being well nutrified from my diet, and from a massive reduction in personal toxicity levels. In nature animals don't menstruate, but when they come to live in "cooked food" diets such as in zoos and home breeding "projects" they do. I suspect very strongly that because we store our toxins within the fat layers and circulate throughout the blood, that when we build up this inner layer, it just makes more sense for the body to shed it. If it was a pure-toxin free nutrient dense layer it would make more sense for the body to reabsorb it.
I just felt it was appropriate for me to share this experience with those of you who may be still suffering severly from the monthly "curse." Before I became more educated about food I craved salty-sugary-starchy-crunchy foods (chips, crackers, pasta, cake, cookies) likely for the reasons of repressing emotions, simple and complex carbohydrates and especially chocolate. We have an archaic memory for the chocolate craving because this food in it's natural raw state is so nutrient dense it has therapuetic levels minerals and vitamins, especially magnesium which we have noted is relaxing to the muscles and it's synergistic components which is fundamental for getting the most out of your nutrients...in other words, taking supplements is not close to as effective as eating foods in their natural unaltered state. When chocolate is adulturated by sugars, dairy, wax and other filler it actually contributes more to intensifying "symptoms" than it does to relieve them. Now, during the purging point of my cycle I crave raw cacao beans, green juices, nuts and olives (fats to help with the emotional fluxuations of being a human, the denser foods keep emotions less surface evident, though being mindful to allow as much emotional release as is appropriate for you at this time) and still that comfort/memory sensation of crunchy things which urge I now fill with flax crackers. Going heavy on the greens and cacao helps to remineralize what you are losing through blood release. Exercise and plenty of oxygen (walk outside, hike or take tall flights of outdoor stairs if confined to a city) go a LONG way in the endorphine department which keeps moods elevated. I hope this helps. I also happen to make the best superfood sugar free chocolate candy I can ship anywhere in the world. Back to earth loving lunar cycle...happiness~

http://www.racrystalpalace.com/raw-chocolate-candy.html

rawkmas-ness is in the air

2009-12-08T20:47:00.000-08:00

A couple years ago around this time which was right before the initiation of my extreme life make-over (unbeknownst to myself) I dreamed of my incarnate twin soul and realized he was not on this plane of existence...or well, that is up in the air I suppose, but it appeared to me through the dreamscape that he is currently existing on the other side of the veil. I woke up with such a strong awareness of his existence that I was soon sobbing for being awake in a reality without him. I am having this memory at this time as I am flooded with old emotions desiring to be freed from the confines of this organic being.
The challenge of accepting the confines of this existence can be overwhelming especially seasonally if one has chosen as mission to be in a place that is low in natural light and heat source and resulting in urge to hibernate and pack on insulation. I have so much time in my daily life now that is filled with clarity and insight and foresight and mission/purpose understanding that down time has become easier for me to manage, but I remember when I was at my fullest toxicity level with a deathwish 3000. Because of how far I have come I can imagine what lies ahead. I have detoxified to such a degree that life is extremely joyful the greater percentage of the time, my life and work is fullfilling, I find peace in small things, and I foresee a time when all experience this at all times. I understand also that I am here to inspire others to take the steps required to fullfill their own missions of becoming joyful.
Meanwhile we are living in a heavy energy transitional period as so many of us are awakening to the understanding that the confusion of existence is not what we thought it was...and the consistent thwarted attempts to raise the consciousness in our fellows can be defeating if we attach to the outcome of doing our respective mission work. It often looks like two steps backward for each step forward, but we are actually learning how to get better and better at accomplishing our goals while paving the way for those who will follow close behind. We often forget we accepted our personal missions before we came here. We set up all these experiments, experiences, collective and personal, for the eventual understanding of the all that is.
There is ebb and flow...there is stride and there is stall...work, rest, calms inside of storms...it is important to remember to observe more than be attached...enjoy and allow emotions, but don't get so caught up in them that they prevent you from doing what you know from intuition is to bring you the most joy. A lot of people when offered a solution to their pain syndrome see it as totally optional or out of the question. Some people say they would rather die than change (and they will) their lifestyle, up until that moment when the instinct to live sets in and they blaze off to the hospital in an ambulance with the expectation that a team of "experts" is in place to save their ass from all the damage they could have prevented. They say they aren't concerned with living a long life until that moment when their heart starts to give out, or they are faced with dying slowly of a degenerative disease...then they try and fight their way out of a paper sack without even taking the tools that were offered to them to prevent this whole problem in the first place. And it's really not that they don't want to live...it's really just that they don't want to live how they are feeling now, but they don't know there is another way to feel...and so here I am, having lived through this whole healing crisis event in order to be able to share it with others...in the middle of the mission, the landscape can look kinda bleak, but I hold a strong faith and vision to what is to come...we are awakening, and the chains that have held us back for so long are falling away...I just miss my best friend...but I am grateful for all the other wonderful spirits in my life...and I am grateful for my oh so many blessings, and I am grateful to not get caught up in low vibrations for too long (we are learning how to re-navigate this process to rise above and leave it behind in the eventuality) and I am greatful for finally understanding my mission and being in the recognition full time awareness that the Universe does indeed gots my back. And for this I am in service to the all that is...and I thankyou for being in this moment in my life in our collective expression to share it with me~

growing pains

2009-11-25T10:58:00.000-08:00

part of the journey is sometimes being in a holding pattern which can lead to the most obvious question, "why am I on this journey again?" Often we are forgetting we are here to co-create and coordinate joy...we get stuck in the seeking of finding this outside of ourselves, and we forget to love ourselves when earnestly seeking to give our live time and love to someone else, but partnerships are almost always compromises and compromise always leaves something desirous of self, in the losing of something for the happiness of someone else, which could also be considered a form of maryrdom which is therefore a quiet death of a piece of self.

We are learning how to be keepers of our own light and what its greatest most wonderous gifts of power are for and how to use these powers for transmuting the negative eons of ions we are just on occasion to recognize as contributing to the all in such a way to be counter productive to that which we actually wish to be always in all ways, pure joy. What are we afraid of? That we will be bored without causing ourselves inner turmoils and burdens? That by detaching from our pain we lose a part of ourselves? That loneliness is the scariest thing in the world and we won't survive it? We are all surviving it all day everyday when we are so lonely in a room of people we cannot even look each other in the eye anymore and smile, with the pure joy of knowing who we are, and this exterior is nothing if not inferior to what is going on behind and beyond the curtain.

try this mantra:
I invite the real and the true to arrive in my life today. I will not turn away...I will accept the grace of the divine light that resides within me and I will newly cherish my ability to give and receive love, in all the ways it was gifted to me to give and receive.

*Over this Thanksgiving holiday I have offered up my vessel to purge the sorrow of so many lives lost, mindlessly lost to appetite, on all the realms that is presenting in... this experience as exterior and interior to me...I do turn over all my vices in love for the water and the air.
Give thanks, receive thanks...BE thankful truly, with the feeling of gratitude we are connected...without it we fall back into the muck and forget where we are and why...you are happy-go-LUCKY to be alive

lotta lotta lotta in the works

2009-11-24T01:13:00.000-08:00

We go through energetic spells and cycles...there is some down time going down right now, lots of transitioning, people making forward momentum and looking outside themselves for the source within and feeling the impact of that (guilty)...we are all in this together and I have offered myself up as a support system for people making the kind of changes I was making, making the effort on their part gets my support returned ten fold...because of so much scarcity consciousness right now (its not real!!!) people get in the way of their own flow by trying to take from others and give nothing in return...lets focus on putting an end to this by supporting each other in all the ways that we can...I see when my efforts pay off, and I stop putting my energy towards people places and things that have offer no return investment...I can't purge your emotions for you, I can only purge my own...I do that at will and because I have to, or I will die of dis-ease. So here is some of a love ranting...a little bit about why I am not the most compassionate spiritual person you know...I am really me and I am realistic and faking nice is not how I play...living my truth, that's how I roll~~smooches!~~
oh yeah...and I am singing...

Somethin goin on round here...

2009-11-17T16:33:00.000-08:00

When you come to realize that your mission is joy, you get in that mission and reality literally begins to unravel before your eyes, in a GREAT way! The old reality you clung so hard to for it's ready supply of pain, frustration, emotional disturbances and confusion begins to fall away...attachment becomes a fairly ludicrous concept. Allowing people playing the victim to walk all over you and steal your energy becomes impossible...the people who vibrate in negative levels of reality begin to effortlessly fall away from your life. You can see incongruencies coming from a mile away and you stop them in their tracks. When people appear in your life to detract from instead of add to it, you recognize that and you can say something to the effect of, hey listen...I worked hard to be where I am and it's not that I don't value the act of giving and how that applies to my understanding of reality, we give and receive to each other in all ways and at all times...I comprehend that I am recognized as an energy source, and those coming to lay at my feet (metaphorically) who want to return nothing for this gift, get to be filed in the other line that is going in the other direction. I have only so much time in my life and there is SO much to do with it...I can assist those that are willing to assist themselves by returning to me something tangible for my efforts, so that I can continue to assist more people/animals/plants/energy sources that also assist themselves in this interaction...we have to heal ourselves to be effective. We have to nourish ourselves at a cellular level. I hear the same comments ALL the time. Some days it is SO blatantly obvious what a conundrum we are circling inside of, that all I can do is laugh. Paradise on earth is totally possible...it's all the whining and complaining about what it takes to get there is all that is stopping us. You can focus on a grand scale view of the big picture, or you can go all the way in with a microscope and you'll see the same thing...the interconnectedness of a giant energy formation plugging it's ears with chunks of beef and cheese whiz on a biscuit. Healing from the inside in order to reflect this outward is a full time job. Quit being a pansy and get your bones to work (punny).
I have more than a couple dozen videos up now on my Youtube page:
http://www.youtube.com/Bananimalrecords

There are a few dozen really great raw foodists out there providing similar free services. If you are too tired to leave your house, make the food connection my friend and for pete's sake, watch some videos...educate yourself...I am tired of feeling like that VW van in the pixar movie "Cars" --"I'm not the only one seeing this right?" Get the steak out of your ears and start seeing in full color, then we can talk, briefly. It is not my job to wake up anyone aside from myself, around noon...do you seriously get to sleep till noon? Uh, yeah, I was up working till 9AM! So if you want to "borrow" some of my personal time, be prepared to invest in yourself on a level that your self can understand at this time...when I help you make a leap to the next level of consciousness, then you'll see the value...until then, I cannot explain to you what I am offering anymore than you can describe to me the color red if I have never seen it. Please waste your time belittling people vibrating at your own level...your time directed towards complaining about me is lost time, because I am too busy to care! This is an overleaf response to a lot of what I am seeing with people, not just around me, but in general...a lazy, bored/boring, judgemental society who thinks they are owed everything on a silver platter. The best of the best are a pretty sorry lot. We really gotta step it up!

Excuses are SO last year...let's do it people! Down with pesticide laden dead foods, and up with green juice, superfoods, and delicious joy filled joy joy...stop being addicted to your pain and detach...it is only there to remind you to DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT! DO IT NOW!

I LOVE YOU, Can you hear me?

All is All until and allways~

2009-11-11T01:51:00.000-08:00

Some days when allowing emotional self observation, choosing to resonate with lower vibrational self is unbeknownst to be self releasing stuck energies, while going through it seems grieve filled. Any ol doozy can trigger it...it feels like not exactly the opposite of joy, but the recognition (re-cogging the wheel) that the inadequacies of life here still exist whether you choose to observe them regularly or not. So you can float above yourself, be dishonest with yourself and others, or you can quietly observe that each choice you make affects everything and choosing to move through your OWN inadequacies rather than stuff and stuff them is the most efficient use of down time you might make. It is relevent to observe that the Universe is often giving you the space to do this by removing other distractions and if you seek to reimplant new distractions it is kind of like building up a dam that is edging in on itself regardless...you may as well let the trickle through make it's way as opposed to an explosion at the other side of a perfectly built glass house...be in it...sit with it...love that you are alive for this experience...don't demote yourself as less than for having feelings other than above average.

Love Channeling: Crystalism

2009-11-05T14:44:00.000-08:00

~Thou shalt doist unto self that thou be best able to give love and light to others

~Thou believest thou has everything thouist dost needlessly request

~Thou is NOT a carpet for other people's perceived inadequecies and projections there-of

~thou shall not mine the others for the answers thou has inside

~thou shall allow thyself to feel and experience thy emotions

~ thou releases from thy life what anchors thy self down

~thou shares the light by being more than talking

~thou has no duty to awaken any other than self after a well deserved rest

Be there or be pineapple shaped~

2009-11-04T14:03:00.000-08:00

AK Raw Vegan TV show!!

2009-10-27T08:57:00.000-07:00

Lotta episodes of my new internet TV show are posted...and a lotta more to come...much has been filmed...editing takes a while...7 segments of the trip to Chena hotsprings are now posted...enjoy!

http://www.racrystalpalace.com/ak-raw-vegan-tv-show.html

RA CRYSTAL PALACE

2009-10-21T03:42:00.000-07:00

My new website and online store is live--I am very proud of my new baby...please stop by and have a look around (with much more to come in the future!):

http://www.RACRYSTALPALACE.COM

I set lofty goals...

2009-10-16T01:42:00.000-07:00

...it's how I have gotten where I am and how I stay focused on where I am going. Sometimes we need to write simple goals because a lot of times we don't even know what we want or what will satisfy our spirit and make us happy...so write a simple goal today: "I will now discover what makes me the happiest and get on the path to my life mission." Then write it down...this effectively presents it to your mind and sets it forth into motion. Then say it outloud. Your body and the Universe respond to the energetic vibration of your voice. This will get you on your way, but you need to take ACTION! When an idea is presented to you, do it! If you can't do it at that exact moment write it down in a small motivational notebook you carry with you at all times. Refer back to the notebook throughout the week to remember what ideas you had and decide which things you can act on immediately, and which things you can work towards by taking a step in that direction. I have a lot of interests and a lot of passions so I have a lot of projects going at once. I never get bored because if I have downtime on one project, I have time to work on another...and there are certain kinds of projects I need alone time to work on, and there are other projects I need helpful people for...so at varying times I may not be able to focus on my one project that involves other people and their schedules are factored in...this way, I don't just feel idle or stuck on one thing...with so much energy from raw super foods, I really just like to be doing something. When people tell me they don't have time for that project they want to do, or they don't have time to make raw meals, I ask them to take an honest inventory of where they "spend" their time...remember, your time IS your money...so are you going to spend your money sitting on the couch crying over someone who is doing enough for you, or can you spend your money on 15 minutes in the kitchen making some delicious foods to nutrify your soul and give you the joy and energy it takes to be an effective functional person in your own life? Got kids? Give them a pile of art supplies (paper, pens, tape, old boxes, scissors) and you just bought yourself an hour. Kids old enough to play with knives? Put them to task on the chopping, whizzing and whirring in the kitchen. Kids love to help and to be useful and they adore learning new things...this week my super-hero class is called "Play with your food" and it's kid friendly because I strongly suspect they'll be giving us some of the simplest ideas when we turn over the planning to the imagination.
And for me, I set specific goals, because, well...I get a lot of inspiration and there is so much to do when most of us awakening are still taking a hefty load on raising consciousness...but it's fun, if you do it right! Figure out what makes you the happiest today, and do that as much as possible, and you are on your way!

My October Itinerary and beyond:

The month is half over and there is a lot left to do...I simply haven't had any time to begrudge winter replacing our amazing summer...I've too actively been enjoying the last days of fall and preparing like a busy ant for the winter months...there is a shift in consciousness in full swing and being an active part of this has been the focus of my last year...the first step was to detoxify and nutrify myself to the degree that I can now help others while continuing to maintain the art-work in progress, myself and my immediate community. I have made a few recent purchases in order to be even more effective in my work and I enjoyed the summer immensely while not whittling away it's vast and fast abundance...I spent many days each week in the field, lovingly harvesting wild herbs and medicinal mushrooms with respect for nature, and carefully preserved them through drying, apple cider tinctures and self education along with a helpful dose of intuition.

-I will be cataloging and presenting an online store of wildcrafted herb teas and medicinal mushrooms to kick off my business "The RA Crystal Palace"

-I have added to my energy session work an EMF grounding sheet, vitamin D light, more stones and essential oils, and a crystal healing bowl tuned to the solar plexus. These tools are going to be especially helpful as we buckle down for winter losing our connection of bare feet on the ground and lots of light on our skin
-I will be filming a session to better aid people in understanding the work that I do as a healing facilitator through guided intuition and "earth tools"-I finally got a decent digital camera so I can start making all the videos I have wanted to do as my part in the digital education movement-

-I used to make vegan cooking videos but I took them down after I realized what a shame it is to kill our food and did not want any part in sharing those ideas--then my camera wore itself out and I have been without the ability to make video for a while...I do a lot of stuff for people pro-bono but it always seems like more people are asking for more of my time for less--giving me little to nothing in return for my vast hard-earned knowledge and I simply have no time to short change myself at the expense of people who really want my services and are willing to invest in themselves but I understand people see me as an oddity thriving on raw foods in AK when the myth that it is so difficult is continuously perpetuated...I have wanted to put up videos for a while so that I can say it once and then direct the unanswered questions to entertaining mini-movies...then people will have no excuse not to invest in the FREE information. Some videos I am planning:
-My raw vegan story: why/how/the results
-my trip to Chena Hot Springs (will be my new camera's test drive) where they are building a sustainable community with geo-thermal energy, growing organic food year round and also keeping ice sculptures frozen year around with the same energy that keeps the green house warm in winter--amazing tourist attraction to raise awareness on sustainability and eco-consciousness
-body brushing in the shower--and other natural hygiene tips for people who realize that not only "we are what we eat" but our skin eats too so there shouldn't be anything in your cleanliness/beauty routine that you wouldn't eat!
-tips on uncooking intuitively instead of following long drawn out recipes with designer ingredients
-the mind/body/spirit connection and an energy session with a client

*I will be giving a talk on the connection between spirituality and nutrition at the Anchorage Metaphysical/Spiritual Center on October 25th at 9:30 AM. I was astounded to discover myself that the changes I made in my diet impacted my intuition 500% and I moved into a state of being that would be considered living in the Now in Flow...it is amazing after being an intuitive lifelong seeker to discover after 35 years that the missing link was food!

*I will be creating a leaflet that is more comprehensive of my services as they have become so varied, now including:
~Energy work
~private raw food consultations and uncooking classes
~Superhero training sessions with lectures and raw gourmet meals on Sundays
~private chef
~wild herbs and medicinal mushroom teas
~superfoods~

*`I have connected with a great new Filmmaker who is joining my team to make a movie about a girl who goes through a life transition with the help of an energetic being who visits her in her dreams...a character study in the vein of "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" meets "What the Bleep Do We Know?" So I will put forth a lot of effort to scrape the most strenuous scenes off my platter and be ready to open my new center "RA Crystal Palace" as soon as there is more time in the day!

Through October we will be slating and promoting the "Conscious Living Festival" which already has an amazing entertainment line-up, including my lecture on raw veganism and how it could literally serve and save our planet at all levels across the board, especially by healing self first and empowering self to impact community globally by acting locally. We have lots of great acts and vendors already but we need more vendors and sponsors...please spread the word!

Thanks for reading all this...shouldn't you be DOING something? *wink"

Quadruple healing tea

2009-10-09T17:58:00.000-07:00

Over the next couple weeks I am going to be going through my wild herb inventory, both dried and tintured with apple cider vinegar and putting together a proper collection of what is available. For now I am offering for immediate mail out a blend of 3 top medicinal mushrooms harvested locally with the local horsetail harvested throughout the summer:

Top Shelf Tea (get it, made with shelf mushrooms): Chaga, Turkey Tail, Birch Polypore, Horsetail blend. 3 powerpacked medicinal mushrooms with the silica from horsetail will literally rebuild YOU.
$15 includes shipping and information packet

Handful of Wildharvest Alaskan Chaga
$15 includes shipping and information packet

Please email me with your order and I will send you a Paypal receipt. Orders will ship within 2 days of receiving payment:

BananimalR@aol.com

Birch Polypore Geisha Girl

Chaga with turkey tail dried and ground in vitamix

ground turkey tail...you could pack a pillow with this stuff--its really neat!

Foreground-dried horsetail, background dried turkey tails

Chaga Chaga Koo Koo

2009-10-06T03:43:00.000-07:00

Want Wild Alaskan Chaga? I'll send you a handful for $15, includes shipping and information how to use and what's so UBER great about it...but if you want some you prolly already know...

Email your email address to: BananimalR@aol.com I will send you a paypal receipt and after payment is received it will shortly be on it's way...be sure to include your current mailing address.

a wild chaga mushroom in its natural habitat: easy to sneak up on

the beautiful orangy colors inside make my heart swoon

I have gotten so attached to spending time in the woods for my sanity and seeing the beautiful life healing chaga (and other amazing medicinal mushrooms) all the time that I have decided to make it available through online ordering. I first thought it was silly to offer people something that is free to get themselves and then realizing of course not everyone is lucky enough to live where it is so abundant...I am not going out to harvest all the chaga I see...I am only harvesting small amounts as needed, and I love the woods and the trees as I do so...I am as respectful on my forages as a clumsy human can be, but the animals feel safe enough to come right up to me so that is a good sign.

Me and my new boyfrient Chaga taking it to the sheets

you only need a chunk about this size for a couple days supply

put a chunk in a tea bag in a jar of spring water and in the dehydrator 115 degrees and the next morning you got delicious warm tea and enough energy to redecorate your town...those nagging aches and pains? GONE!

*Here's an idea to occupy your mind if you live in Alaska while your waiting for that giant PFD deposit to go wild....
This Wednesday, meet at Goose Lake parking lot by the lake and look for my white ford taurus and bright red hair...your local chaga super hero leads the way through the woods...you'll be amazed by the profound amount of FREE medicine available in our local woodsy areas...learn to spot mushrooms that improve your life with properties such as improved energy, immune builders, anti-viral, anti-parasitic, liver cleansers, anti-candida, anti-oxidants, cancer and auto-immune disorder aids...how to collect your mushrooms and what to do with them for developing the BEST health ever.
$25 fee for this class-- plenty of information will be presented for you to have a great time and learn useful information on how to harvest and use local medicinal mushrooms
Call me if you have questions: Crystal 575-7393
Bring a small backpack and some baggies if you want to take some goodies home and dress warm...its fall in Alaska...well behaved children are welcome to join us!

Love Speaks 4

2009-09-25T22:15:00.000-07:00

Remember we have chosen to be here at this time for our lessoning...that being said, here is the intutive energetic interpretation of what I see as under the surface brewing currently:

We are walking headfast into a new way of life. The lights are coming on brighter than before shining like a spotlight on that which is unacceptable to the organic reference of survival in a body-temple as a piece of the interconnected web of life, or all that is. Human nature is to resist change. When change is placed in front of the human and the choice is do or die, many will choose the latter. This is difficult to watch, but we have chosen to watch for our own understanding of self. What is seen and unseen is intertwined and what is unseen is coming to the surface faster than some people have a reference for. This is manifesting in a lot of personal anguish, anger and pain and childhood blocks resurfacing rapidly. The time to deal with and assimilate these experiences is: the sooner the better! These blocks left undealt with are the cause behind organic decay...I could go into this scientifically, I could go into it energetically, I could go into it metaphorically, but I can state it quite simply...deal with your past so you can become present.

Be present and kind to self as much as possible and when you find your strength waning, call on your friends...we are managing through energetic support systems to be working at different times and when one is down, the other can uplift and vise-versa, servicing the greater good. It will often appear as a great loss when we see setbacks in the lives of our closest companions, family and friends alike...here is a vision to aid in your sense of well being: The energy grid surrounding the earth in this planetary transition is filled with our loved ones, from this lifetime and beyond...they are holding the light from outside the force field of the earth...those of us here are anchoring it to momma earth...see the beauty in the decision of those who have chosen to leave earth at this time as everything is increasing in speed exponentially, from our technology to our understanding of self to our self destructions peetering out in tandem explosiveness, to the eventual re-blossoming of all life on earth...as dark as it gets, remember the light after the storm and do not lose sight of the prize...paradise in earth...it is not only possible, it is right around the corner...don't be afraid of releasing your pain...there is nothing to lose, only to gain...the beauty of everything renewed is alive and well in the mind of you~

Personal check-in update

2009-09-13T15:45:00.000-07:00

OK...so I am gonna out myself on a few issues today...I am proud of this functionality of my personality...it seems rare in this world right now, but as part of the lessoning process I intend to be a leader for people learning and understanding that we are only as sick as our secrets...that is why I choose to have none. If you want to know something, ask me and I will tell you the truth. I might not be the first to bring it up. I have been walking through this world in this incarnation in earth time 35 years...I can't bring up every topic in every conversation...there is so much to talk about! I also have limited time...I cannot spend an hour, or days or weeks, or months helping every person I see who needs help, but one of the issues I am outing myself on today is getting attached to people who's issues I can see very clearly and try to fix at the expense often of losing self. I have lost years of my life trying to save other people, hardly ever noticing their pain was not mine to hold on to, and MY pain is the pain that needs focus on repairing that is what is actually the only thing that helps other people. It looks backwards when you watch it unfold because when you hold up a higher self people rush to milk off your energy, and in their attempts they can often weigh you down and prevent the forward momentum you were building. This is why, after learning to understand my empathic abilities and how to use them, I have chosen to charge for this service, and to very quickly recognize and separate my time from people who don't see the gift and continue to attempt to milk it from you...they usually don't see they are doing it. Your first instinct is to attempt to help them see it...but if they don't, you have to cut them loose...or they do deplete you and steer you off your path. It is more challenging and tough soul work, but worth the pay-off...be in your joy, and don't let others distract you from that.

I am currently in a cathartic process as I work on a HUGE artistic project that intends to be planet changing...meanwhile, a character of old self is merging into my daily life and if you are close to me you may see these aspects of my old personality resurfacing as they are being freed. I am pretty comfortable with and enjoying the process. I have no intention to hurt anyone close to me. I will remain honest and open with everyone I know and meet. Its no secret that I am making a movie and that the main character is based loosely on my life. Its also no secret that we ALL have many facets to our personalities...we have emotions and we have moods and we have our private challenges. What I have found for myself is that I very easily get addicted to the feelings I get from other people. When I annihilated most of the toxic addictions in my life I was left wondering why I was still attracting people in pain. This is what my process is helping me work through now. I have found that the more balanced and useful way to deal with this issue is to do work on other people on an energetic level...it helps them and it helps me.

You are not going to meet the same person every time you see them and the same goes for me...doesn't mean we have to identify as multiple personality, bipolar, schizophrenic, or any other identity an archaic system likes to use to classify if we choose to operate in and out of many layers of reality. In fact you can see the gift and use it to multiply the joy in your life...I hope you do!

Meanwhile, when it comes to the energy work I am doing, I am able to set aside my own emotional needs and energetically tune into yours. When I am done working on you, I am able to come back to self and set your stuff aside...took me YEARS to figure this out...it is all about having clarity from being at a low level of toxicity after using raw foods to clean my own temple for a long time...here I am 500+ days raw, still thriving and loving the process...it is an ongoing non-ending process...that tuning into your higher self brings to light the path of your own creativity more clearly, and you begin to co-create with the Universe on a more clear and effective level. Everything that you are clutching onto to keep hold of the old you, is just keeping hold of you and holding you back.

No matter which emotional, personality or functionality you happen to meet of me on any given day, you will always be meeting my authentic self...and if you do not return to me your authentic self in our dealings you will not be held closely to me in my circle of friends. It is not a judgement on you, it is a mechanism of my life cleansing and staying on task with all I intend to accomplish.

Update on my digital and interweb life:
I generally bring well focused information to my blog, though topic and subject matter varies, I stay aware that it goes out to the entirety of the internet and intend for it to be useful information for anyone who accidentally stumbles in, or who follows regularly. Facebook is my playland where I am more of my goofy and highly charged emotional self...you can add me there no matter who you are, even if you just want a window into my life, you will have the opportunity to come in as a voyer and play with me...if you abuse it you will mysteriously disapear from my friend list never to be concerned with again. I keep my myspace posted for music dates and music you can listen to...you can also order my CD from there, but I don't spend time playing on myspace...I get in and get out a couple times a week when it comes to approving add requests and comments. If you really want to get ahold of me on an important matter, email me, or call for a session or come to super-hero class when in the Anchorage area. All my information is in the post below this one.

LOVE LOVE LOVE...it is all we have~

promotional services

2009-09-08T17:48:00.000-07:00

Love Speaks 3

2009-08-21T21:07:00.000-07:00

As the energy acceleration process increases exponentially, the assimilation and acclimation process is at a most profound moment of now, and the only apparent choice is to adjust to it, or leave the planet...meanwhile, your current paradigm as it relates to the moment is willingness to not accept anything less than perfect integrity in your life as the only option. If this means standing up for the plants, animals and yourself at the hands of the less understanding addressing you with negative connotations, is that really so terrible? Can you handle being called crazy by the crazy? Yes, you can, and live happily through it with nothing but compassion and joy in your life for the clarity you have succeeded in reaching after a life of striving for it. Can you find the humility to enjoy all that you have been given in your Universal treasure chest and accept it without guilt, fear or trepidation? Can you do the work you have assigned yourself for your own reapings of joy? Can you be happy without the acceptance of people you can clearly see are not presenting in their own perfection? Can you be happy alone or with others who truly see you and who you truly see and love them all? Yes you can!! All of this joy and more is yours to own and savor. Face the fear, walk through it, and see there is nothing on the other side. It is OK to express anger at being treated as less than you are. You are not a carpet to be walked upon. You are a divine being owning your divinity and those who would sit in the glow and desire to take it from you do not deserve such precious amounts of your time. Time is your greatest commodity...it is always now and always now is what defines the infinite you...so do not be defined by the words of others. Be who you know is the core of your being and nothing less...accept nothing less from yourself or anyone who wishes to be near you. When you compromise yourself for someone else, everyone loses. Make a decision today to settle for nothing less than complete and total joy of being...do it now~

Love Speaks 2

2009-08-14T12:28:00.000-07:00

In preparation for the arrival of continual upliftment to the planet, you are rapidly experiencing new ways of seeing, feeling and understanding. The negative is as apparent as the postive and you will begin to find people's intentions are very obvious. It will be helpful for you to strive to understand more and more ways of interacting with unique types of individuals, the more fear filled needing the most gentle approach. It will never be helpful for you to stay in an interaction with a person who is using all of their source power to lower your vibration rather than higher their own. If you are able to help them see what they are doing so they can change it you will assist them in their interactions with others as well...however, if you cannot assist them, it should become obvious immediately and you need to disconnect from the drain they wish to be on you and move on to where you can be useful. This is not to say not to have love and compassion for the individual who does not know how to subsist on self energy, but staying in relationships or even conversations with people who are clearly not able to express joy and would take yours rather than become mobily upward themselves is unhealthy for both individuals. A person who appears angry and distraught to you may have a poignant message for you, themselves, or both. That is to be determined by the interaction and both parties response to it. When a well put listening and interpretation tactic is utilized (such as, listening to the argument and repeating back, "I think what you are trying to say is..." and state what you believe the point they are trying to make is until both parties are clear), often the anger can be resolved, assimilated, moved through and improve the relationship and interaction for both parties. However, the more obvious kind of angry interaction where the self feels immediately attacked and belittled by the anger of another usually means their is a long stored fear pattern in the individual presenting as an inability to love self, and thus attempting to "feed" off the individual who IS able to love self and is thusly empowered by its own source energy. The individual who feeds off of others ability to create source energy rather than their own is sometimes called the "energy vampire." In most cases, the energy vampire does not know it is doing this, but does not mean you can allow it to subsist off of your energy out of your own ability to have compassion. This individual will not be served by being given your energy and without tools to create more than enough energy for self, the self can then be depleated by the energy vampire and immobilized for a time sufficient enough to recharge self so you will be doing a disservice to self by continuing to allow it. Your challenge then is to learn to recognize what is happening quickly and separate from it. If you recognize yourself as being in a state of not loving self, your challenge is to go inside by getting quiet with yourself, face the fears that prevent you from loving self, and make the appropriate adjustments so that you will not be a drain on others.
Much advanced learning is occuring now with interacting and mastering the process is always ongoing as you will always meet unique individuals. It appears to be most effective to identify commonalities first and focus on those until a layer of trust is built, then if the two interacting indivduals choose to help each other in their collective evolutionary process, a state of safety has first been achieved and negative reactions are minimized from the beginning. This can be a very wonderful experience in discovering self through others. And an all-ways reminder to respect the self enough to not allow abuse by a lower vibrating entity. We will all be most effective in places where our wisdom is desired, not belittled. If your worth is not valued you are in a place you don't need to be. Self worth trumps every situation. Don't forget your freedom to leave any situation is always there, no matter what it looks like on a physical level of reality.

RA subsidiary: "The Crystal Palace" is in operation

2009-08-08T22:25:00.000-07:00

RA Living Foods/The Crystal Palace
1909 Cleveland Ave (back of building, ground floor entrance-entry way lobby leads to several doors...Crystal Palace across from washing machine, sign on door)
907-575-7393

Super-hero training classes: Sundays 5PM

Paradigm shifting, eco-conscious, planet friendly, health, wealth, philisophical group led discussions, followed by a full course gourmet raw meal. Payment for this class is donation or barter.

details of the weeks itinerary and meal (along with other local health oriented events) is updated weekly here:
http://www.meetup.com/AlaskaVeg/

Services available by appointment on donation/barter basis:

Private "uncooking lessons"

raw vegan meals to go (for one or many-"private chef")

intuitive readings and energy healing sessions with a modality of your body's preference, may include: Crystals, essential oils, natural raw tinctures, specialty herbal teas, chakra clearing, past life regression, aura cleansing, resolving emotional blocks, channeling ect.

supervised imagination playtime for children of parents on the go

guided plant foraging and nature hikes

freecycling-select from anything offered or donate an unused item in good condition

superfoods and other rarities such as cacao, unpastuerized nuts, exotic healing foods

To schedule an appointment contact:
Crystal 907-575-7393

Love speaks 1

2009-08-03T02:13:00.000-07:00

Once identified as immortal the organic being is freed from the fear that incapacitates it's collective conscious latent powers...the source of all that is, the energy that interconnects us, the ability to have what self wants at a moments thought, or without a thought at all, and specifically, learning to live in NOW consistently, joyfully and with activated full potential. Most people query what this even is, it seems impossible that another being who looks a lot like you could be experiencing something totally different, or seeing something completely different while looking at the same thing.
Skeptisim appears to be blocking many sitting on the verge of making transition into the NOW paradigm. We refer to it as a paradigm because there are myriad of choices in expression as a part of source, but appearing that many of a collective wish to pursue a particular paradigm they have come to understand as fully activated bliss and union with everythihg, a release from fear, a desire for immortality, we now offer the acceleration of this realization through a series of collected ideas and data we have observed through our own existence, and in being so close to ourselves for so long, we are relearning love exponentially and watching lights glowing brighter and brighter across the globe. Love has always known how beautiful you are...it is so happy to see so many remembering also.
We offer these as gentle suggestions or ideas on how to ease the physical being through the energy shift transitional period: learn to recognize "mind chatter" that is negative to self or others and attach a personal nickname to it so that as soon as you identify it, you can switch your mind gears back to positive present moment thoughts by calling it as it is. Believe that you are always safe, no matter where you are or what is happening, YOU are safe...nothing can hurt you, as if you are always in NOW, you are invincible and will always be in the right place at the right time. Identify fear within the heart chakra as what it feels like and where it came from. If it feels like a pain in your heart, ask the pain what it wants to tell you in order to feel better. Ask the pain if it is comfortable feeling the way it does and if so, why would it want you to be hurting. Apologize to the pain in the understanding that you accept its existence but know there is a better way that you can co-habitate in the body together without hurting one another...the pain identifies as a life of its own, energetically, and nothing cares to lose its life...if the pain understands it can feel an even better way, it will likely choose to feel like that...and if you are now communicating with your pain, you are as crazy as it is, and I have complete confidence that the two of you can work it out as a team. Have a good time! Feel free to report back your results in communicating with your pain...and if its misery, we love hearing about that most, as you know, misery loves company...go forth and commiserate, resolve, relief...LOVE~

Dear Everyone

2009-07-30T07:52:00.000-07:00

magic magic magic child
You are more beautiful than the night
You are light light light

To infinity and beyond
it is in your eyes
Sharing is caring
brought to you first by the happy care bears
We all still love them
we gave them the tools
we gave them the toys
the wizard is getting out of the stone
by walking right through the noise

now a simple smile will do
I just look into the triangle for you
but I am really just looking for myself
can we see each other
through the reality tunnel?

Should I put down a list of my heritage?
Danish, Swedish, Welsh, Icelandic, Ohklahomaian, Cherokee, rape the land so I will see why, I don't want to drive that boat, straight into the sky...
I told you I would never lie, and I promise what I lie
or can we just lay our tools of rage down, watch them build all around us until we cannot stand the site of it all...cry through the heart and feel the fear through, until it NO LONGER SCARES YOU!!!
There is nothing scary on the other side, nothing scary down below, just little worms all trying to grow...lined up in a row!!

May I chage the message, "the world is not ready for you yet"
to:
The world is ready for you NOW!!!

New set of goals:

2009-07-29T12:57:00.000-07:00

be love joy and peace all day everyday

123 Posts, last published on Jul 9, 2009

2009-07-16T01:08:00.000-07:00

Goal setting projected next 2 years

Open RA: Raw Vegan Restaurant/store/herbal healing paradise/home- "gourmet eco living cuisine"

Produce the movie: "Aurora"

Write book: "Why You Are Sick- And How to HEAL"

AK RAWK STARS: Inspirational multi-genre music collective

Tincture and herbal collection to fascilatate healings

Career retrospective

Practice greater and deeper appreciation and gratitude for the family of friends and soul group I have attracted to aid in this journey of revisioning Paradise on Earth.

And SO IT IS~

Big Time in Tiny Town...

2009-07-09T03:42:00.000-07:00

WARNING: RANT STRAIGHT AHEAD...POSITIVITY TO FOLLOW, PROMISE. The title of this blog was the title of a Brian Hutton project that stuck with me for so many years. In a small town it's easy to be a mover and a shaker and get a little attention. The piles of memorabilia lying around my room waiting to be transformed into an art exhibition is proof of that. If you read my full resume, you wouldn't believe it was based in reality. It's also easy to be a Klingon, or a Slacktavist...people who hold up an image of "doing something" but don't do much but hang around for the notoriety of being with the movers and shakers (famous by association), and the worst kind pretend to want to "promote" the good/hard work of others but in actuality just seek to make a profit from their association. I was SO embarrassed for Kurt Bundy(AKSOUL) being quoted in the Press this week as saying that as soon as his "good friend" Brock Lindow of 36 Crazyfists told him he and his wife were expecting their first child, " I immediately started doing the math in my head,” promoter Kurt Bunde laughs. “I was like, ‘Yes! She’s due in July…that’s means 36 will be available to headline Summer Meltdown!’”
I copied and pasted this quote and it's hardly taken out of context...it's the main quote in a story about the 5th Anniversary of Summer Meltdown. The bad grammer is either poor writing, poor editing, or intentional quoting, who can say. The saddest part really isn't how Kurt layed his hand on the table for all to see, but I can't imagine how much money he has spent on advertising at that rag to be holding hands with someone who would make him look so stupid. I'm sure he said many things during a significant interview and that's the quote that makes the print. Well aint that journalism for yas. I put my time in writing music reviews for that paper myself, and was then and am still continuously baffled by the lack lack lacking in local music and art support. It's kinda like they put on a good store front that showcases something-though most times it's hard to tell what- but there is always an empty store-room. One of the last things I did while I was there was shed some light on some bands that were getting none, especially Delmag just before they really blew up and I begged and pleaded to get 36 Crazyfists a cover story, stating my case time and again that they had put in their time and paid their dues and deserved the support of their tiny home-town paper for f@#ks sake. Shortly after I had enough of the behind the scenes hoo-doo-voo-doo, my old editor took a shining to Delmag (thank God) and wrote a nice cover story for them, and shortly there-after, a spectacle of 36 was made on their front flap as well. I never asked for any credit nor was given any, and in fact, was at the receiving end of a lot of smite for giving my constant and relentless, unforgiving opinion about your band. If your music sucked, so did your review, and I didn't really care what you thought. It was a process I needed to assimilate in order to understand the wizard behind the curtain of mainstream media, and guess what folks...it's worse than just a little guy pulling strings and making smoke...he is actually locked in there, without a key or any sustenance, brain washed, baffled, and doesn't know which end is up. The previous interpretation of the local independent media (who is supposed to be the "good guy" mind you)is pretty much a practical metaphor for every system we have in play right now...the government=f@#cked, the court system=f@#cked, the schools UBER F@#KED, your local grocery store=WAY F@#KED, medical system=you don't even want to know, nor do you care, that you go there when you don't feel good and they only pretend to help you while quietly robbing you blind.
An ENORMOUS team of people are on the planet at this moment, and if you are reading this, you are one of them, but most are lost, broken, angry, confused and spiteful about all they see and feeling powerless to change so they DO NOTHING...an entire soul group that is here to break down all the broken systems so we can be returned to our natural modus operandi, which is paradise on Earth...true freedom, peace and joy...it sounds so far fetched because you can't even believe you are holding it in your hand but you won't put the key in the treasure chest...you have been given the key already! You are holding it! It's not the beer or the glass of wine or the cigarette or the cheeseburger or any other garbage dead food, and you know this, but still you use these things to avoid facing how much work you see ahead of you. Fear is blocking you, and there's really no explanation for that...fear is an illusion and on the other side of it is the joy you have been looking everywhere for but can never seem to find. Today I had my feet in the water and sand of the Anchorage shore...my inner rock collector and plant scavenger is back, WELCOME HOME! My daughter brought her little stuffed pink poodle with her and when she tried to set it down somewhere I reminded her that she had lost something doing that the other day, because we don't always go back the way we came on our adventures...so she held onto it, but a few minutes later a moment of panic overtook her face as she clamored for my attention she said, "mom, where did I leave my poodle." I had to keep a straight face while I said, "I don't know, where do you think you left it?" She was ankle deep in the water looking around and finally said, "well, I know I did't put it in the water!" Took her a few minutes to finally realize she was holding it and we both laughed really hard. Deep belly laughs are much more common for me now than bad days when I let other people's cess pools dribble into my pool. I took my kids plant foraging today, but on my way out of a park that shall remain nameless with my exciting find, a small currant bearing fruit, I was stopped by an overweight man seething with negativity who claimed to work for the park and was making it his duty to inform me that "harvesting" plants was not allowed there...we were welcome to pick the berries but not take the plants as they were there for others to enjoy. I made it my duty to inform him that plants were put on the earth for us to heal with and felt I had the right as a human to utilize them freely but I would be happy to allow him to look in my bag and "take back" anything he felt was inappropriate for me to take home to which he replied, "well, that would be pointless" pretty much like telling me I couldn't have them then? Well, I personally didn't see a single soul off the beaten path, and doubt very highly that he could have even identified the plant, let alone found it, nor would he have known the berries were edible had he not seen me proudly taking this small gift from mother nature home with me to be enjoyed for generations to come. I wished I would have asked him how much they were paying him to harass me so that he could he could go "harvest" some dead animal carcasses from the grocery store for dinner later...an animal who's miserable existence was rewarded by being slaughtered for dinner for the appetite of more misery upon misery upon misery--YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT-EAT MISERY, BE MISERABLE-- THOUGHTS, MUSIC, AND PEOPLE are also your food-slash and burn all that doesn't serve your highest good/food...c'mon people...there aren't any excuses for slacktivism anymore. It is time for action...it is time to refire the grid and reclaim our latent powers...we are a string of christmas lights and when your light is out so is the connection to mine...and as bright as I will shine, I can not light the whole string on my own...you are holding your little pink poodle in your hand and I am waiting for you to remember so we can have that good laugh together...until then, rest assured I will work harder, prouder, louder and even more happily on your behalf...but when you are tired of finding no answers on your couch in front of your TV, meet me at the beach...I'll tell you what I know;)...oh, and if it's winter when you remember, I'll be the lil ant that you know grasshoppa. Until then, if you aren't part of the solution, get the FU#K out of the way, cause here we come~

T-shirt coming soon "AK RAWK STAR"

2009-06-29T20:39:00.000-07:00

SUPER HERO TRAINING CLASSES
Sundays at 5PM @ The Crystal Palace (my raw kitchen)
$25 for drop in or $100 for five classes.
RSVP for directions BananimalR@aol.com

Each week we will learn to make a simple delicious recipe you can easily add in to your busy life, a talk about the value of new and exciting ideas each week, question and answer sessions, how to tap into more source power, heightened intuition and your other latent super hero powers waiting to be tapped into...plus a delicious raw meal!

Raw cacao powder and "super-hero trail mix" available each week or with any order.

Raw personal chef--how to order:

There are currently no restaurants or caterers in town offering raw gourmet meals. Until I open RA, I operate out of my private kitchen to insure no cross contamination that might come from a local commercial kitchen. I can prepare meals for you to last a few days, or serve a few people at your event. Rather than offer up a standard package, I prefer to sit with my client and find out exactly what they want and need, what kind of health challenges they may have, or allergies, and cater specifically to your needs and desires, therefore, prices and preparation times are going to vary, but here are some basic ideas of what I can do for you...and in general, I can usually conceptualize a way to recreate your favorite comfort food in a raw delicious format...so don't consider this list by any means a complete idea of what is available to you, from me ;) My services cost less than an evening out with friends at a gourmet restaurant, minimum order is $150 which generally serves 4 or yourself for a few days, depending on ingredients and what you want. The bigger the order, the more choices.

Hire me to prepare a meal for you and your friends, or organize a class of at least 5people willing to pay $25 per person (or you are willing to pay for them) for a lecture and potluck style meal in my kitchen or yours.
I am open to bartering and getting back to our roots, literally!
Contact me for a quote and consultation: Bananimalr@aol.com

zuchini pasta putanesca, jicama raw-violi, stuffed flax pocket (not-hot pocket)

bell boats

mini heart pizza

raw-zagna

thai spring rolls with coconut wrapper and sushi

bird's eye sushi

potluck!

A picture says a Million words...words fail~

2009-06-26T05:32:00.000-07:00

Ordinance 64 aims to add "non-heterosexual" (Lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, transgendered)people under the list of citizens who would be illegal to discriminate against in the work place, housing ect. I AM ONE OF THESE PEOPLE...AND SO ARE YOU IF YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE. Jerry Prevo has been out in full force handing out red shirts and signs to oppose ordinance 64. We have GOT to show them that red does not outnumber blue because they ask for a show of hands from everyone in the assembly who agrees with each speaker. The Assembly has been taking testimony from the public for almost a month now. I am 576 on the list to have 3 minutes to voice in favor of this ordinance passing. It is time to organize and rally the troops! NEXT MEETING- JULY 7th- Loussac Library- 3PM (to get a seat, or you will have to play on the lawn and in the lobby). WEAR BLUE!!

I was sixteen when students from the entire Anchorage school district organized on the library lawn to protest teacher pay cuts...we had to cut class to do it...wow...how did the word spread through the grapevine before cell phones, blogging and facebook? It is a good thing I didn't trip in a puddle cause I would have drowned with all those rosaries on...childhood memories.

Oh CRAP! Who forgot to send the memo to Miss AK that Red is WAY totally last season.

honest to a fault...oops, he forgot loud, obnoxious and under-educated. Did he really spell racist with an S? Apparently there is a following just for the spelling of the word in this way...it is in the "Urban Dictionary" as this: What happens when someone calls conservatives fascists and racists so much in their trolling that their words begin to run together.
The word rascist has a cult following on the ProtestWarrior forum.

Ordinance 64--Raw perspective

2009-06-23T22:50:00.000-07:00

P.RE-S.CRIPT : *I sat at the assembly meeting for five hours…and an hour in line before that to get my awesome seat, but the hatred was sickening, and shortly after the guy in the red shirt sat next to me wearing too much perfume, I started getting nauseous and toxic headache…when a kid claiming he had explored every aspect of his sexuality and concluded that he was not gay and that homosexuality was not the opposite of heterosexuality but the opposite of holiness I reached my limit of ignorance and had to depart…*

I now sit in the front row of the June 23, 2009 Assembly meeting and I move to object to the entire system of government on the grounds that the whole thing is a silly ludicrous circus based on drama games that we could all now choose to remove our energy from if so desired. This is sort of challenging to do when your mind is fogged and clogged with toxins. Everything makes so much more sense when the freedom to reconnect wholly with spirit is enacted by the freedom of the movement of energy through the body, also identified by Chinese Medicine as Qi or “Chi” or in Ayurvedic medicine “prana”—or life force energy…*there was a notable lack of life force energy in the assembly chambers*

“I now choose to accept my mission and responsibility as a proponent of the love/light energy and allow the power and abundance that comes with this responsibility to flow effortlessly into my life.” I am proposing this as the new mantra of the leaders now choosing to step forward and claim what is ours, and become aware of our status as shepherds of the new energy and thus lead the way for all who are stepping forward into the next level of our evolution…it is happening whether we are aware or wanting of it knowingly or not…on a subconscious level this is what we have created and it is a long time in the making.

Raw food lifestyle negates all the necessity for these silly laws they are spending all this time playing around with. It just goes to show how bored people are with life that they have to create all these games. When you come back to life, TRUE LIVING, you come back to MAGIC. There is no boredom anymore…you get mesmerized by the slightest things…things you didn’t even see before like auras, ormus, the sparkle in a rock that once looked gray, the sway of a flower by no apparent breeze…it is truly a magical place to live and a magical time to be here watching the best of times meeting the worst of times, and the inner knowing that we are going to live through this transition and actually see the future of many generations…I am looking forward to the big belly chuckle we are going to have when we all sit around looking back on the times we sat in the little rooms discussing the miniscule nuances of what to do with our garbage, literally, metaphorically and metaphysically…

The last time I was at an assembly meeting, a bunch of people from the local music and art scene were here to support a liquor license transfer for a “woulda-been” bar called the “Thirsty Monk” but so many people in that community were opposed because of the potential cliental were known as “Alternative” and perhaps not responsible enough to be in charge of policing their own drinking behaviors. It was ironic tonight that I watched a liquor license transfer to the Marx Brothers museum without a peep from anyone. Apparently the artist communities who support the museum are different from the artist community who support music. Some things still baffle me.

I didn’t come here for any other reason than to support love, in all it’s many shapes, sizes and colors…I love this day, this flower, this breeze, this planet, these people…yes even you crazy heads wearing red shirts standing up for hate…it’s ironic then that the leading cause of death is hate…heart attacks kill more people than anything…closed heart chakra…hate…hate kills…love heals…I live for love…and I love you—YES YOU!!!!!

I actually listened to a young woman in a red shirt claim that she was discriminated against because a man dressed in women’s clothing was in the women’s bathroom and the police wouldn’t do anything about it. She said, “that’s not fair to me and I don’t want to live my life in fear.” Whether or not a person is Gay is still out to lunch on the issue of nature versus nurture…we may never answer that question, but what you feel is definitely a choice and you can choose one of two types of emotion…love based, or fear based…so living in fear is a choice…no ordinance, no color of shirt, and no man in your bathroom is going to make that choice for you…you choose love or you choose fear with every breath you take…I learned a lot tonight, but one thing was clearly reconfirmed…it’s really time to evolve people…lets get a move on…I like to move it move it…bust a move~All is One~

The time for LOVE is always NOW

2009-06-17T03:30:00.000-07:00

I danced for 3 solid hours, with just a couple bathroom breaks, to which I ran full speed back and forth, just because I felt like it, on the Loussac library lawn of all places. Oridinace 64, which aims to prevent discrimation against "non-heterosexual" people, has been hearing public testimony since last Tuesday's assembly meeting, and I can't remember when the library lawn was so lit up since I was in highschool and kids from the entire Anchorage school district cut class to protest some proposed teacher paycuts. Those against the ordinace wore red, and those on the side of love wore blue and other colors...lots of colors and rainbows. My daughter, who knew nothing of any of this ordinance or my plans to attend the demonstration, got out of the shower and chose a blue dress to wear for the day. Clear indication of her powerful Crystal Child intuition. On the way to the library lawn she asked me why so many people were wearing red and holding signs. I told her that some people think you should be able to love whoever you want and be able to hold their hand and not get bothered for it, and some people don't agree, and they are wearing red. She told me she thought anyone should be allowed to hold hands and love each other and so she didn't want to be on the red team. I told her, "there aren't any teams honey, just choices." But for the sake of humor, the blue "team" showed up with a DJ and my booty started shaking as soon as I got there and it never stopped...at one point Chaplan held the letter I in a group of people collectively carrying the word EQUALITY. After that, a crowd had finally collected to join in the dancing and the library lawn was morphed into a dance floor--I never stopped dancing until after about 3 hours my body finally said, he, that's about enough...Chaplan became the center of the dance floor, and was filmed and photographed throughout the day...she expressed that it was too bad her brother wasn't there cause he would have had fun...tomorrow is another day and he will be with us. Someone who knew I was looking for a cameraman for Saturday's show approached a camera man who found me online later this evening and the shoot is on! Thankyou Universe...sigh, what a wonderful world...rest assured my friends, love always wins...change is happening...we are it, and we are enjoying the journey, now aren't we...indeed, and so it is~

new and old beginnings...

2009-06-12T01:06:00.000-07:00

give fear an inch and it'll dig you a big hole...in no time...but hold strong to knowing all is well, even if you can't tell from looking, and watch the magic bloom right before your eyes...something you didn't even know you were doing was just following your bliss leads to this cup overflowing uncreakable waterfall...it just flows and flows and you can't stop it...I've heard this saying to be careful what you wish for because you just might get it...stop wishing, get clarity on what you want, and then open to receive it...but make the room, do the clear cutting...be a flowist...go where your joy takes you and you get into the Universal flow and that ever present knowing that it is all purposeful...
Today was slash and burn clearcutting and new seedlings sprouted all in such a short spanse of time there wasn't any room to get scared...now that is magic.

My June Events Calendar:

Saturday June 13th -7pm-midnight, Organic Oasis "Aurora" fundraiser featuring:
Mike Gorder
Mike Olson
George Faust
Tom Christ
TOT
Brian Lazer
Snack Pharm
I will also perform and give a chat about the movie plot and the inspiration behind making it
$5 suggested donation

Saturday June 20th 10PM Chilkoots parking lot beer garden, after Puddle of Mudd concert
on a technicality, Puddle of Mudd is opening for me...how cool is that.
I have a free ticket if you are a videographer with a HD camera.

Saturday June 27th 6-8PM Palmer United Protestant Presbyterian Church
Alaska Vegetarian Society has invited me to be a guest speaker at their monthly potluck to tell my story about raw foods and perform a few songs
Info here: www.alaskaveg.org

Sunday June 28th 4PM Superfoods 101
The Living Room Club -- class and a raw meal $25
contact me to RSVP Bananimalr@aol.com

Every Monday Open-mic hostess at TimeOut Lounge--4600 Old Seward

Dear Anonymous

2009-06-10T01:38:00.000-07:00

At every level of our respective journey, we find soulmates to help with the work of personal progress. We come here in soul groups with goals, and we help each other to reach those goals. I myself have had the great honor, joy and privledge of meeting and learning from my many many soul mate friends and lovers. Most of my soul mates have helped me to grow so quickly I had to leave them because I literally out-grew them. But thanks to the law of attraction a new batch always springs forth! And I surely could tell the new mates the old mates go on to attract a few choice points of interest, but we all attract that which is for our highest good, our own experiences, our own lessons, in the discovery of finding out our next greatest version of ourselves and it is not my job to interfere with your lessons. So I leave it to my fellow soul mates to discover each other...the things I would warn you about the men I have left are usually a matter of public record, if you so desire a rap sheet of your current lover, its actually online through the wubbulous world of the internet. Fortunately for my ex-lovers, I don't feel it is my duty to inform anyone of anything I discovered through our private interactions...because people are our mirrors, usually we are learning about ourselves by learning about others intimately and the faster we can recognize this, the faster we evolve. So if you feel it is your duty to inform me that a soul mate of yours who is also a soul mate of mine loves too deeply and too quickly I would suggest you investigate that within yourself and discover the pearl in the oyster...but don't discard the oyster when you cut out the pearl...that's where the meat is...in the love...because you can never love too deeply or for too long or for too short...love is always right all ways. When it hurts, it's not love. Maybe it started as love but one side grew in a direction that wouldn't allow the branches to flower if they did not expand. Our soul group needs to grow together and get tighter, not more separate...when two are attracted by the magical powers of energetic magnetics, there is a mission to be completed...it may last a lifetime, it may not...I've cancelled two weddings out of gut instinct. I've born 2 children of 2 different soul mates...you can rest assured and sleep well at night knowing I don't live in a delusion of the mysteries of time and what it does to people. I also don't live out of fear based thinking...I live out of love and always answering the question, "what would love do" with the answer being, "if it feels right, do it." The tree you grow doesn't always look like you might have expected when you planted the seed, but it was in the growth of the tree that the beauty was assimilated. And it all comes back round to food...when you stop eating pesticides, fungacides, larvacides, toxic waste, pasterized, homogenized, puss filled, blood filled, hate filled, greed packed nutrient deficient food and start nourishing your body, heart, mind and soul, the fog clears...you see the forest for the trees...literally! And vibrantly green--just like the light of the Universe that flows green straight out of your heart chakra...and love is the solution, your daily anecdote to baffling ignorance and blatant hate running rampant on beautiful mother gaia--everyday you choose--choose to eat love, breath love and be love...love yourself enough to let the light in and let yourself find it...every little thing just wants love...give it....there is plenty for all~

post script: I don't approve anonymous comments unless they are poignant and devoid of agenda

ASK CRYSTAL

2009-06-05T18:05:00.000-07:00

I am out there...and in here...and all over the wubbulous world of internet, putting out roots in my efforts to inspire humanity. A beautiful life sustaining tree is blossoming and it's the most glorious sight to behold. Through many avenues the questions come...I feel like I put a great deal of energy towards answering the questions of the curious...stillness speaks, and that is where we find the answers...and the "law of attraction" or "what you believe is what you receive" is trumped by "YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT." Now there is a big difference between someone who came to raw foods as a solution to a problem that had no other answer by conventional means, and through who's discovery every question is solved in the process of taking the puzzle apart instead of putting it together...and someone who is just curious "why do you eat raw...what is so important about it?" The simple answer is, you'll know if you do it! The irony is, you'll never know if you don't! I can't explain to you what you will experience if you go raw because it is beyond words...words fail. Show me a man who says, "I'll believe it when I see it!" and I'll show you a man who is going to continue to see what he believes...because what you believe is what you see, not vice versa...your outer world is a reflection of your inner world...if your cells are dying inside, your attention will turn to all outside of you that dies...sometimes this can be metaphoric...parts of us that are no longer useful to us must die...habits, negative thinking,...but nothing wants to die...instinctively we hold hard to this organic house we find our spirit housed in...why is the will to live so strong? What is consciousness and what happens "if" we die? Do we really have to die? Doesn't everything die? There are, on the planet right now, trees that are around 5000 years old. What is the consciousness of a tree that has been alive that long? It doesn't go looking for anything. It gets everything it needs out of the ground and the air. What can we learn from this tree? It was here before everyone alive now was born and it will outlive many of them. A tree may shed leaves through cycles of seasons, but with each new arrival of light and heat new growth will spring forth. A blanket of snow and ice may cover the ground, but the roots beneath the soil remain alive and the leaves shoot forth in your lawn every spring...no need to replant your grass every year, it grows back! It is thoughts and things that destroy and thoughts are things. If a pest comes along and eats up the roots of that 5000 year old tree, it may fall...but the tree itself does not think of dying...it thrives because all it knows is thriving. And that is what the inner light that is you knows...the inner light that is love and peace and joy only knows thriving...and when you clear the fog, you will remember who you are and you will know that you live forever...you will remember and so you shall become that which you know. Where your attention flows, your energy goes. When I started to invoke the law of attraction, I noticed that I always got a great parking spot because I believed I would...the Universe would line it all up for me because I had faith in that tiny thing. It still happens and I don't think about it a bit, but I still marvel at it and try to remember to say thankyou everytime. I also used to grumble all through the grocery store...why do I always get the crappy damn grocery cart with the wobbly wheel that is hard to push. Imagine how long it took me to recognize it was my own damn fault for believing I was gonna get that crappy cart. That tiny little thought was a VERY difficult belief to change, believe it or not, but I finally did...I finally put my full faith into getting a perfect shopping cart everytime, and now I do, at least about 89% of the time...which is way better than than the 15% I was formerly operating at. It takes a tiny tip of the scale to recognize the difference between believing what you see and seeing what you believe, since it's challenging because of their inter-relations. And when you "know" you'll "see" and when you go within you'll know, but it takes a clear mind to go within and come back out with anything useful.
I believe that the body doesn't have to die, but rather it is made to evolve towards needing very little to survive and operate more like an ethereal body, able to transcend space and time...and that the same spark of light that keeps the 5000 year old tree alive is the spark of consciousness that exists within us, and it is all connected in a never ending web of light...it will take full self-actualization (knowing, not just remembering you are pure energy) to activate the ascension process, and it is slow going with so many in the collective consciousness believing only what they see because it is all they believe...but with the ushering in of the new energy, the old energy is falling away...you will aclimate or you will leave...you will do it by clear and present joyful choice, or you will do it subconsciously, but one way or another you will make a choice...I have made the choice to accept only beauty and joy and that is all I see...forever and ever, amen. Yes, I am still evolving...no I am not perfect...no I do not have all the answers, but I have some good ones, and now is it not remarkable that I have spent my life answering my own questions to have people seek me out for them, but not just that I have the answers to give, but that you come to me believing I have the answers...I am filled with joyful tears at the honor of this responsibility. I welcome and honor your questions and treat them with the joyful intetion of our collective evolution towards Paradise on Earth.
Send any question you think I may be able to answer for you to:
Bananimalr@aol.com
I won't use your name unless you ask me to~

We are the Ones we have been waiting for-planting fruit with tears

2009-06-05T12:26:00.000-07:00

May came in spittin fire and the residual freckles are happily nestled across the bridge of my nose and cheek bones...June is drizzling in with much energetic work to be done, clearcutting for room to plant the crops that will sustain us through winter. I love the metaphor of seasons. Now is a huge time of change on a certain level for those of us who have decided to stay with Mother Earth through the energy transition, and for those of us waffling on the idea, now is a time of "shit or get off the pot" as my Dad used to say. He is now lying in bed slowly dying of cancer of the bladder. After two conventional operations failed to prevent it from growing back they told him he needed a replacement bladder to which he said no thanks, I'll try holistic medicine. Unfortunately, holistic medicine is the mind body spirit approach, and he won't change certain things that are going into his mind body and spirit, thus the body doesn't have the "power" to "fight" the dis-ease. He looks like he no longer has the strength to be angry, but his house is still filled with poison and your house is a relfection of your body. For those wishing to truly change their health and thusly empower their life in every area, the recipe is really simple. First, get alkaline...cancer, or any other illness, can't grow in an alkaline environment...so when you eat a diet rich in fresh raw organic produce and super foods, you give your system the fuel to expel the toxins that are weighing you down. These toxins, present in every packaged food that is made from any material grown with pesticides, herbacides, fungacides, larvacides, pasteurized or homogenized (which is pretty much everything not grown organcically including animals who are fed these foods-wheat, dairy and meat are expecially acidic and mucus forming) create a fog around your mind also and you are not able to see all the magic of the Universe that is present around you miss so much of the bigger picture. It is well to remember that thoughts are things and what you are feeding your mind you are feeding your body and vice-versa. It is cyclic in that one thing feeds the other, and it is more difficult to maintain a peaceful state of mind when you are eating animals who died filled with fear. That energy is stored in their body as cortisol, a stress hormone that floods their flesh when they die. So essentially, if you are eating fear, you are living out of fear based thinking. This is where so much scarcity thinking comes from...we live on a truly overflowing abundant planet, but a mental mindset of scarcity prevents us from seeing it and since we are tied together by the collective conscience, you are actually hurting everyone when you consume dead food. On a cooked food diet, a walk through the woods was always pretty boring for me. As a raw foodist it is like walking through a fairytale...completely unbelievable. A long drive, or a jaunt through the city is now filled with angel nudges to look here, see this sign, a running dialog with a collection of guides I am surrounded, protected and loved by.
Ten years ago, I was mentally preparing for this time in my life when the people in my life would be faced with the choice of changing or transitioning back into the spirit world and leaving room only for those who want to be here in love and joy on the planet. My Mom died last summer. My lifelong companion animal Yago left this past week. Others in my family are going to follow closely behind, my father very soon. Ten years ago I looked to this time with dread and impending grief...today I can only look on with gratitude and understanding for all I have experienced and all I am continuing to experience. I am happy and OK with the choices others make...I have true peace that I never knew existed and I have reached the understanding that it is not my job to save anyone. I only have time and energy to help people who want help, and that is what keeps me going...the joy it brings...and so I have given myself the task of going through the pile of old family photos to bring them up to the current level of technology and to have a nice album to preserve them...so many faces of my father looking at the camera, in a youthful able looking body, but always that glazed expression, cigarette and drink in hand, hiding behind his true power that was too overwhelming for him to ever take the reigns of...and I smile with only love for him, and what I learned from him...knowing that I will leave a totally opposite legacy for my children...the ones we have been waiting for~

What I dream up for my children

2009-05-22T01:47:00.000-07:00

...that you will soon know the joy of joyful tears, that sad tears will go the way side and that you understand first hand when momma cries she isn't always sad.

...that you forgive my quirks and understand that character flaws are little gifts we receive from our own childhoods and that if you some day see mine in you, you can smile at them after-all.

...that you sculpt and nurture every incredible astounding talent with which you have been gifted...the opportunity to change the world lies straight ahead.

...that my life's work and study is passed to you vicariously so you needn't do all the toiling I do

...that by the time you are creating and inspiring the next generation, we will have worked out the flaws that accumulated over time so you may birth happy well kept children onto a planet of paradise

...that my mistakes are lessons you don't have to learn on your own

...that we are all learning together and improving everyday on our path of discovery

...that I may open enough to receive that which you have come here to bless me with~

when the student is ready...

2009-05-19T13:47:00.000-07:00

...the teacher will come. This is an adage I read early on in my life studies of the spiritual side of things. I suppose I have been on what some term "a spiritual journey" since I was old enough to ask the question, "why am I here?" (which was VERY young...maybe my daughter's age, 7ish...and wonder things like, how do I breath? What is making my heart beat? I would look out at the vastness of the stars in the night sky and wonder, "If the Universe stops, what is stopping it?" I looked for answers in science...I loved studying bugs, rocks and chemical reactions...yes I was a nerd, but I prefer dork, thanks...that suits my goof-ball side better. So I respond as well to the term "spiritual journey" as I do "hippie" or "tree hugger." The response in my body to people's desire to label and put you in a box is,"blech, I don't want to be in a box--let me out." I never went to church...I wondered always, "What IS God" instead of Is there a God...I never questioned whether or not there was a creator, I just wondered what was the nature of creation...why did things appear the way they appeared in so much as so much didn't make sense. So I think of it as less of a journey, and more of an innate nature and consistent never ending desire to understand more about the nature of existence and my place in it. Around my pre-teen years I started to wonder about the more intangible experiences like ESP, knowing the phone was gonna ring right before it did, or that a particular person was about to walk through the door. I was a teenager when my grandmother revealed to me that she had pre-cognitive dreams that on a couple of occasions intuited winning lottery numbers...just enough to save her ass a time or two--she gave me the book "The Celestine Prophesy" when she was finished reading it and this was the next level from pouring over her library of Extra Sensory Perception books...she also was the one who introduced me to the Indian avatar Satya Sai Baba whose words in books I began to gobble up with the appetite of a black hole seeking the light. When I found the Urantia book I sent her a copy and also "Conversations With God" and something from the Kryon series, who was introduced to me by my daughter's Dad. After my daughter was born I opened a book about Ramtha, which, curiously and for no particular reason, I had picked up at a thrift store many many years earlier and never opened, but it was the perfect time for me, of course, as I began to be open to the natural timing of the Universe I began to see it more clearly.
So pretty early on in my "spiritual studies" I heard the adage, "when the student is ready, the teacher will come." I wondered and wondered all the time, where is my teacher? When will I be ready? I expected an enlightened guru to appear before me and take me under their wing and make me a better person, full of the wisdom of all the expanse of time. I have laughed outloud to realize the teacher was here all along, gobbling up the books and the experiences becoming its own enlightened guru...becoming a teacher, and now that the teacher is ready, the students are coming. We are all students and teachers to each other, if we only look. I love that I have the answer to your question...I love that you have the answer to mine...my friends and co-creators of paradise on Earth. I love this amazing astoundingly beautiful planet so much...in this moment I can't think of a single place in creation I would rather be...and that is our mission here...to strive to make this place a place where everybody wants to be. It is a current impedment that a greater percentage of the planet's population doesn't want to be here. We will turn that around and when we do we will evolve exponentially. It is very clear to me now, why there are so many "problems" that appear before us on our way to where we are going. It would take a whole other blog to explain that, but the bottom line is, when you start filling your body with only joyful energy, you will soon start seeing the solutions instead of the problems...then you realize that the answer is simple...you work on your own little pile and let everyone else work on their own little pile until the fog clears and we start teaming up to work on the bigger picture...we are doing this now...join the chorus by finding your voice...find your voice by cleaning the toxins out of your body...I've said it a hundred times and I'll say it many hundreds more, I'm sure...the answer is right in front of you, at your feet, growing in your garden~

Things you can't plan...

2009-05-18T20:12:00.000-07:00

The astoundingly beautiful Universe is always always and in all ways, conspiring to do you the highest good, even if you can't always recognize it as such...but you can choose to become a reverse paranoid and begin to believe that the Universe is conspiring to make your every moment full of the most joy possible...and soon you will have no choice but to acknowledge such experience.
Three years ago when my unexpected, and gradual transition to optimum health began, I was a meat eater and I didn't even like raw foods hardly at all...maybe the occasional strawberry or chunk of pinanpple...a salad with a good gooey cooked dressing...now a days, I thrive, not just joyfully on 100% raw foods, but with more joy than I ever thought was possible on this planet. It changes everything, and it cannot be explained in words, only experience through action. Now when people tell me, "but I could never live without meat" I just smile, and think, you are right...you will die trying not to...slowly and painfully of heart disease or cancer or some other such muck.
There is a balance to be found while doing a total life make-over. I have finally become comfortable with being a little ahead of the pack in the future I know we are all headed toward...I can relate to how you feel about your current lifestyle, and yet, I could not give up my current lifestyle if I was paid for it...cause I never want to turn back to a life of emptiness and lack of fullfillment...I choose to live each joy filled moment of inspiration to it's fullest intent...and someday I hope you will too...if that day is today and I can do anything to help you let me know.
Best wishes on your journey...I'll see you out there~

Integrel intergers

2009-05-17T13:11:00.000-07:00

Todays topic, hell, call it what it is -rant- is integrity. When one chooses a life of strong intention and integrity, a lack of integrity anywhere near you becomes more than just an elephant in the room...it is a blinding light in your face that even sunglasses can't deploy. I have been dealing with all sorts of levels of lack of integrity in various areas of my life. It is one of the shadows revealed when you shine a bright light on your life. When you are focused, grounded and well aware without emotional attachement, you can see lack of integrity coming at you a mile away, as clear as you can hear a lie in your face. Sometimes we just want to believe something so much that we choose to do just that. But sometimes you see something so painfully obvious that you can't ignore it. So what do we do with these issues in our current times of growing awareness? I tend to call people on their bullshit and demand for them to face themselves. That's what I did when a neighbor treated me with a lack of respect and less than honest intentions...after hemming and hawing he was resolved to be forced to come to me in a place of integrity. We were all improved from that interaction. I was actually reprimanded for my extreme view in thie area (because most people seem to prefer to sweep the ugly under the carpet, I would rather look at it and handle it in the best way we can come up with) in a court room semi-recently when I noted outloud that somebody was acting with a lack of integrity. I was then asked if I would like to be accused of acting without integrity, to which I replied, "I think that if I WAS acting without integrity, I should be called on it so that I could look at it...and if I wasn't, it wouldn't bother me because I would know the accusation wasn't true."
So if I call you on your bullshit, I am probably, in my way--not neccesarily specifically, it's just my way--trying to help you grow. But you may be able to treat me with a lack of integrity a couple of times before I choose to not have you in my life if that is an option...and if I am not connected to you by children or financial obligations, than that is an option, no matter what. Life is too short to have negativity near me, even dearly loved family and friends do not get my valuable time if they consistently fling fear-based words and actions in my direction.
The exponentialiaty of our planetary evolution is doubling ever and ever more often, which in layman's terms means, we are running out of time to accomplish our goals...which makes time the MOST precious commodity...and if I feel mine being wasted I will divert it to where it is more useful in the grand scheme of things...and you should too...work on you for the planet...and I'll work on me for the planet.

Love love love...is all there is~

2009-05-15T07:24:00.000-07:00

"I'll work on me for you, and you work on you for me" -David Wolfe

We are on a mission here on our planet and some of us are just now remembering what that is, some of us have known for a while and have spent our lives educating ourselves and are now in a position to educate others...it's really simple really...we are here to take back our planet and create paradise on earth...and learn learn learn through the process. IF we are steadfast in our desire to evolve ourselves for the better, we can't help but affect those around us...because light is ever present...all around and within us...the brighter we shine the more that shine invades all that surrounds us. Could it be that the answer is so simple it's right in front of us but most are looking right past it into a vortex of man created misery and not even looking at it? YES!...that is an illusion which simply illustrates the power of the mind to distract itself from its true purpose.

Every day you make a choice...where are you gonna focus your attention? The answer is: today, I choose to take the next highest step in my self-fullfillment and upliftment and extend that to every person I meet today on an energetic level. You wanna go a step further? Extend that to ALL fellow beings. Peace IS possible...it starts with getting off a hate filled diet of destruction...fill your body mind and spirit with positivity...in all ways, and always. Your food grows from the earth and is unaltered before it reaches your mouth. "It's easier to sneek up on lettuce than a rabbit." D.W.

We spend so much time in the past and in the future that it becomes challenging to listen to that quiet voice that exists only here and now, in your very present moment...get present with yourself and BE HERE NOW! It's happy here...joy filled...we are in paradise already, if we choose to see it...and the more of us choose it everyday with clarity and presence, we create a space for others to make this choice...put down the tools of destruction that aren't in benefit to anything at all...fear based decision making ceases to exist...because the bottom line is always not how much money is in your bank account, but how much love is in your heart...and your heart is bigger than you know and can hold much more than you have yet felt...remember the grinch who stole christmas, the day his heart grew three sizes...this is your moment...make a visual in your mind and grow your heart...let the light in and let it flow outward...ask not for forgiveness, but ask to forgive...and be ready for more joy than you have ever known...and be ready to be surprised by your own inspirations--yes, all is well in the world and all is on schedule and all is as it should be...but let's grow that in ourselves and in others so that what is well and right gets better every day...ready to start thinking more clearly? You are so dehydrated you have lost your thirst...put down whatever you are drinking and get a glass of spring water--it has a consciousness higher than budda...water is so evolved it cannot even incarnate into a human body...but you can drink it and be inspired right now, then go plant yourself in the sun and make nutrients by simply being...breath deeply, so deeply and smile...now just try to feel depressed...can't do it smiling in the sun...not possible.

I'll love me for you and you love you for me~

Happy Mothers Day

2009-05-11T01:00:00.000-07:00

To all of you who have procreated...congrats on your fine hard work! I had a wonderful day of being fully present and treating myself with great respect while extending myself to planetary service...and here is a funny reminder I found on my new guilty pleasure "facecrack" about remembering not to take it all too seriously...love love love:

I was having an out-of-body experience and almost astral-traveled away yesterday, so I grounded myself and got centered with the help of my spirit guides and then the phone rang, and sensing the negative vibrations, I threw the I-Ching and checked my numerology chart, nearly having a primal, but my energy was too blocked. So I did bioenergetics and self-parenting, took some flower essences and ate an organic oat bran ginseng muffin, but my inner child wasn't feeling nurtured yet.

To fix this, I had a Rice Dream Frozen Pie, which, of course, made me hyper, so I did the relaxation response technique I had just learned at the Self Healing Angst Tree Defoliating Center while listening to my subliminal tapes. But that left me feeling depersonalized, so I did some polarity work, foot reflexology, and past life regression, then rebirthed myself, and called Moon Beam, my body worker, to make an appointment for a Shiatsu/Reike/Rolfing/Feldenkreis/Swedish/Japanese deep tissue massage.

Unfortunately, she flaked out and never returned my call, so I decided to energize my crystals and do some positive imagery because all my visualization techniques and affirmations made my space feel invaded. So to get empowered, I got a psychic reading from Mother Heart Love around the issue of my assertiveness so I could feel my radiance and have some energy for my psycho calisthenics and inversion swing before my harmonic brain wave synergy session. This made me more focused for my actualization seminar, holistic healing class and dream workshop, which in turn made me clearer for my Gestalt behavioral cognitive transpersonal Rechian-Jungian-Freudian-Ericksonian session at the hot springs, but my aura was too weak for my trance channeling group, so I fasted until noon to recharge my chakras.

At that point, I sensed my intuition was high and my cycle was focused, so I turned on my ion generator to open up for my Neural Linguistic Programming session. But I needed to have my pyramid recharged before my guided synchronicity meditation, so I got some craniosacral therapy, which aligned me for the fire walk between my tarot card reading and my sensory deprivation tank appointment. But even after all that, I felt what I truly needed was a meaningful relationship to mirror myself, so I went to my personal shaman, and then to my guru, but they were no help, so instead I went to the Intensive Whole Life Earth Rebirth Cosmic Expo Symposium Workshop to find someone who really knew what was going on. That didn't help either, so I locked myself in a calcium coated Orgone Box and meditated until 9PM.

None of it really worked for me, so I got stoned on raw chocolate and went hiking... and dude... did I feel right with the world!

Overtly overload overly joyful not taken for granted

2009-05-08T21:13:00.000-07:00

The last couple weeks were so chock full of experience on so many levels...I barely know how to put it all to words...spiritually, mentally, physically, emotionally, so much growth crammed into such a short space of time in the grande scheme of things--I am still assimilating it all...cliches are such because they encapsulate such profound compact lesson placed into consciousness like a snapshot, passed person to person so simply and easily that their meaning so often totally lost. WE are the ones we have been waiting for. BE the change you wish to see in the world. I AM.
There is a fundamental flaw in the collective conscience...we have closed the heart chakra, so many of us, because of how painful it is to truly feel...and to attempt to feel something again, there are so many vices leading to addictions, keeping our greatest minds in cycles of pain and insecurity and blowing opportunity after opportunity...when you meet your twin soul, and your heart chakra unexpectedly flies open, a switch you had no idea how to prepare for is opened...I guess there is nothing much to do but fumble your way through it until it makes sense...but it is worth it...my prayer for all of you reading these words is to look in the mirror and find out who is sleeping behind your eyes...because the world is waiting on you...and now is all there is.
With my twin soul and I in the same location, high on mountain tops with two Crystal children, we effortlessly co-created record temperatures in Alaska...what a beautiful few days...thankyou my angels for bringing him to me~

two kids on a bench in the middle of nowhere

Mountain Momma

The Nutty Professor

Kally reads to you from her book

2009-05-06T01:57:00.000-07:00

I have had to embrace and become Kally, I am doing this for the Universe and you, the Universe becomes you, you are the Universe and you...I do this for you all and for all of you (don't mind my enjoyment, it is a joyful journey to show myself to you)...to all my friends:

These things
are not going to happen anymore
in reality
or in your mind
you threw me away so effortlessly
for the finality of all time
I watch them all
in their cozy boats
floating joyfully out to sea
I have been them
and I am still them
but I can't see you
and they can't see me
I can be a brillionaire
I can put diamonds on a page
and I can take that story
to the bank or to the stage
or I can fly it to the moon
where I will find you
in the waiting room
waiting for a transfusion
like it don't make no sense
like walking all the way to the moon
was just an accident
I can focus
or I can step back
I can burn up a room
or I can dim the lights
I can jump rope
double time
I can fathom a routine
that brings home the trophy
I can let it slip away
or I can be me
I can focus
or I can step back
I can bring home the bacon
or just get by on a snack
I can hold the answer
and let it slip from my hand
I can pluck the roses
from the dessert
of the promised land
I can let you put me in your car
I can let you drive me home
but we might never
get where we're going
or I can stand at the bumper
and shout it all out
all the things we need to talk about
everything we just might
do
today

YES YOU CAN!!

2009-05-03T15:53:00.000-07:00

There IS a cure for any problem you are now experiencing...it doesn't come in a bottle, a pill or a bag of cookies. It can't be seen, touched or heard...it is a lifestyle change and an energetic realignment...it can be triggered by changing your diet today...addictions, emotional pain and stress and disease will fall away from you...you will move into Universal flow...your heart will open to accept love and you will love yourself enough to become a beacon of light. It is a process of releasing years of emotional tension and toxic intake...it doesn't happen overnight...there are no short-cuts...it is challenging-AT FIRST...but soon you will forget that you were ever miserable, useless, tired, disgruntled, pissed, trampled on and over and stalled...these feelings may continue to come up as you release lifetimes of stuffed emotions, but they will longer haunt you and stay in your daily wanderings...instead you will be filled with joy, abundance, appreciation, gratitude and love love love...start today by filling your grocery bag with raw organic produce and felling your stomach, heart and soul with the bounty of your Mother Earth. And go for a walk in the beautiful sun, make vitamin D and seratonin...pump some fresh air into your lungs...put the cigarettes down and learn to breath again...your body, your planet and your spirit will thank you with so much love you cannot comprehend until felt...go feel something~

Dear Flutterbye

2009-04-28T18:54:00.000-07:00

A poem:

Even though you blindly trample
the lotus bloom I planted at your foot
when I leaned to affectionately wash your toes
you press the pistle into the ground
and plant the seeds
that will grow
from the light I surround you with
in my mind
and in future or from above
you will look back to see
the beautiful bush that has bloomed
from finally understanding me

With love~

I love this song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uK_E7xS7AtQ

Switchfoot- Dare you to Move

Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistence
The tension is here
Between who you are and you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here

So you say its your birthday

2009-04-26T01:18:00.000-07:00

Today is one year raw for me...and to celebrate I compiled a poem made from my last 30 text messages, in recending order:

can I mail you mix CDs?
Your voice made my balls explode
The wait for my haircut is going longer than I thought
Not going to make it to the computer tonight. Tomorrow for sure:( (editors note: he made it to the computer after a slight protest)
I want to fly up on () and fly back on (). Book it.
Unless that will be your time of the month.
(...) has huge junk...I can't compare.
You singing to me blew my mind..
I'll be online in an hour.
Close your eyes and look at me
Have a good night my love...soon our worlds will collide.
If God is water you and I are two snowflakes
I want to come home...to you...where I belong...
Humming "Stand up" while I work.
11:11 as I lay to sleep...
I'm back online
Stop teasing me...ha ha
Our house needs to be off the grid.
I got your goodies, I love you.
I'll be online in 3 hours
Wake up...I'm online now going to record () tonight...no time later.
Armor is one of my favs
My heart is one and whole with you
Wake up love...I'm off work early and online.
I love you
Must I bend the sky to realize...
Should I give my 2 weeks notice?
The warm fuzzy feeling is still in me...and I still love you.
I'm falling asleep in your astral embrace...I love you so dearly.

happy birthday 2 me

2009-04-24T13:12:00.000-07:00

It is 2 days till my "one year" 100% raw birthday...I didn't mark the day I went raw on my calendar and count the days the way I once did as an AA coin collector...I made one of those handy online counters I can refer to once in a while as it keeps track for me. I considered doing something fun like throwing a potluck party...but in the end, as I have been so introspective lately, I decided to subconsiously begin the long dreaded process of unturning every subconscious stone and found some big ones to get started on...here are some of my blocks...thoughts buried deeply that I would now like to turn over and release...some are obvious...some are buried deeper...people are coming into my life to reflect them to me at this time and I take just an honorary moment of silence to thank you for your presence at this time as we are all growing and learning together...I see your smiling face in our bright and cheerful future...so as I work to create the dream of my life into manifest in my reality, funny little things come from underneath...couple days ago I dreamed, that I received an e-mail response to a sponsorship request that basically told me I was an idiot for thinking this was a viable plan...I uncovered from that, stuck in my subconsious...my trouble with follow through is so tied in with a stuck belief that my ideas are not valuable...childhood affirmations anyone? Money is hard to get...it doesn't grow on trees, we can't afford that, times are tough...what a lot of malarky...get it out...get it out of me! Subconscious buried belief numero uno...people disapoint you...they leave...they don't come back, they don't care, they don't love you, you are unlovable, worthless, boring, stupid, a nuisance...get out of my head...out out out! Here are my new positive affirmations:
Money comes to me effortlessly
I am fearless
I am worthy
my ideas are worthwhile to pursue
I accept abundance
my work is a joyful livelihood

wrote another song...wanna hear it?

2009-04-21T01:52:00.001-07:00

I think I am writing a folkin' opera called "Hold"

Here is song #3

Every night I wait and watch you slip behind the screen
confused that what I'm feeling I have only felt in dreams
a glimpsing of the future or the sounding that it seems
is an animal inside my head tearing at the seams

You must have heard me calling you
like a siren from the wild deep blue

new song

2009-04-19T17:31:00.000-07:00

Just watch me fly
into your light
your heart is mine
I'm by your side, ending time

I feel you coming home
you're on the road
you're driving straight into my soul
I feel your arms around me
I don't care if I'm alone
you are a burning sun of gold
hold me now
hold me now
you're here
you can hold me now

This just in...smoking kills you!

2009-04-16T18:11:00.000-07:00

It was ironic that the same day I had to argue in court about my son's Dad feeding him sugar, wheat and dairy causes icky rashes that can be resolved by changing his diet I found an awesome primary care doctor for myself--she has spiritual insight and these medical relics were on display in her office, back from the days when they prescribed cigarettes for breathing troubles, opium and tar for various ailments--it puts things into perspective when we can look back at how we've advanced--I woulda been that lunatic of the day being chastised for saying, but these things can't be good for you, inhaling smoke into your lungs? That's my metaphor for today's lack of understanding of the affects of diet on the body...the doctor he chose to go see said diet was unrelated, gave him a prescription for a couple of tubes of cortisol ointment (steroids) and sent him home with a popcycle...oi vay. Forgive them for they know not what they do.

And if you were having any trouble getting your kids to gobble down their toxic lunches and dinners, this should help...adding a gross cartoon character to the muck on the menu (he he, good for a giggle though)

It was a beautiful bright day and my goofy lovies were silly on our outing...we are parked, Chaplan is reflecting the light off her sunglasses onto the camera:

What is that bright thing in the sky?

yep...it's bright red hair but it's still henna...my character is a bit of a rocker...yep, Aurora is now in progress with shooting...wahoo!

Living in Bliss--PS: watch channel 2 news in Anch today (Friday) at 6PM

2009-04-10T03:39:00.000-07:00

I am writing music again...the first song I've written since my trip to LA. I am so filled with bliss to feel inspired in a way I never knew existed. So many signs the angel wings are beneath me guiding every direction the wind blows me. I wish for all to know this bliss, and so it is. I wish you could hear the song, the words barely say it...but here they are:

all my life I have been waiting for you,
you must have felt it in your body too,
where there is hard work there is harvest too,
and I will be my highest self with you

and I look in the mirror and I see me,
but you are standing right in front of me,
and this is overt divine clarity,
I am just branches springing from your tree

Chorus: I slip into the space between our eyes,
the space where everything in the Universe collides,
I feel so happy here I think that I could die and know it was a good life,
a good life, a well spent life

Been listening to too many love songs lately

2009-04-09T02:48:00.000-07:00

I'm reminded of an Ani Difranco musing on a live recording where she immitates the backlash she got from releasing the album, "Dilate" "...what's a matter, ya got all girly on us and shit, like what happened to your politics, and uh, is this is a conscious move away from overtly political la dee da dee da and I'm like, no man, I just got distracted." It's really cute how she tones her between song banter always able to express a poingnant view and the ability to laugh at herself at the same time. So where's all my motivational spews, raw uncooking tips, emotional releasings, movie and music buzz? On a big ol plate of so much shit I got to do...but I think what is in order is some good old fashioned archaic word artistry, something near to the core of anyone who may dabble in the pen...remember those long skinny things you had to hold before keyboards? Nothing fancy...just stream of consiousness--

he had his serpent tail just wrapped around my spine
raising an eyebrow could just tell me I was done
We are sweeping words off the floor
Out of our heads and out of the door
I said "I hear your pain
And I’m telling you I’ve been there
Your soul is crying
and you don’t think it’s fair
it’s asking for change
but change is just a metaphor
for bringing light to surface
and seeing what it’s for.

I love you I love you I love you
That’s why I have to go
Because going is just a metaphor
For where I have to grow"

I am beckoned to become
a pixie with a megaphone
he was a stone around my neck
and I had to be released
he will read these words and cry
he will always wonder why
he couldn't be as divine as you
and open up into the light

now I will revel in these precious moments
born inside your mind
where you turn ever an unturned boulder
to find my favorite number
favorite music
favorite color
just to learn me
you become me
we will be one in time~

If any song could say it...

2009-04-07T15:18:00.000-07:00

I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk along are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Oasis

A letter from my long lost twin soul?

2009-04-06T15:36:00.000-07:00

I was granted permission to post a private letter that I thought was so beautiful and inspiring I shared it with a friend who said she eats up the Romeo and Juliet stuff and suggested I post it to the old trusty blogorama...so here is your inspiring NOW moment for today:

The question was:

If you had 10 minutes to tell me something to last with me for eternity, what would be...OK, GO:

The answer was:

consciousness comes first....this reality as humans stems from it.....this plane of human reality is not outside of us to observe....it comes from within....its been here all along....time does not exist....all-knowing and infinite awareness is all...topped with love we are all that is....if we live our lives with complete openness and a love for all this current reality would explode with beautiful energy and all-knowing...one drop of light knows all other drops without communication....because it is the source of the same light....all is one...love is all.................and I have fallen in love with Crystal Hutchens......the old soul....not the name.........

This is your life...are you who you wanna be?!

2009-04-05T01:44:00.000-07:00

so the news story got pushed...but I got to see the spot and it looks good...we are right on track with manifesting the dream...oi vay, some wonderful such joyful things I dare not jinx by speaking of...so I made you a slideshow to inspire you to make your own dreams come true...mine are marching along so that I may soon share them with you--I'm in the flow, I survived walking into the fire and out the other side where the gold lay scattered at my feet...bubbling with joy, I wake up inspired and motivated to be alive each day...I want to share this journey with you and that is what my movie is about, but today is about inspiration and getting you there, where tears fall from gratitude and joy instead of pain...I spent all day on this because I love you, yes you:

your daily shot in the arm of inspiration:

http://www.slide.com/r/TfPDg4Fl7D_nOhvizY4r4LNUxQgY-DH2?previous_view=mscd_embedded_url&view=original

Watch me on the news, this Friday (April 3) Channel 2 6'oclock

2009-04-01T17:15:00.000-07:00

Everything about the process of making a movie is inspiring to me. Writing it, visualizing it, connecting it to my life, connecting with talent...this little blip on the channel 2 news on Friday is going to be exciting because I've visualized that before and it manifested...I like that, but it is also art inside of art, which on many levels this project has turned into this beautiful blooming onion, peel back a layer to see another even more delicate layer...I am living on the most blissful level of creating my dreams right now...it's almost a guilty pleasure to enjoy life this much...I see a vast future of red carpets lain at my feet...walk this way with me...open your heart to the gifts the Universe wishes you to be the recipient of...be grateful for what you have in your hand at this moment, whether it looks like a shiny new coin, or a crusted green old penny stuck to the floor with ABC gum...pick that puppy up and scrape off the grime...your dream is under there.

Earth Hour: mission complete?

2009-03-29T13:10:00.000-07:00

Yesterday a group at my home succesfully participated in Earth Hour despite being in the middle of a gourmet raw meal which I planned a month ago not knowing the signifigance of the day--nor did I know our local Mt redoubt would be spewing ash across the state and guests would be arriving in face masks--luckily I got my shopping done early and didn't have to leave the house. At 7pm I was handing out a three course meal of spring rolls (pureed young coconut, yellow mango and onion dehydrated like a fruit roll up for the wrapper) sushi and asian flavored noodles, plus fortune cookies with real fortunes. At 8:30 it was lights out across the globe (in your respective time zone) for one hour, so we played scattergories by candle light. A good time was had by all, especially one of my frisky felines who started losing his little kitty mind when I started rolling sushi and he smelled the familiarity of the sea...he was all over me, exploring, investigating, trying to find the fish, but there was no fish...I tore off some pieces for him when I was done with my rolling project and he munched it up with joyful fervor.

my guests got the more extravagant version:

2 of my kits:

And on facebook (by the way I am over there a lot and put up a lot more pictures so you should add me if you have a facebook page) I mentioned that I was diving into sushi rolling and one friend asked what does one wear for that, and this was my answer:

Big day today...our first script meeting with potential actors and extras, and then on to my open-mic where channel 2 will be filming a piece about the open-mic I host, and the character I'll be playing in my film who visits her local open-mic...time to get into charcter!

gettin poked

2009-03-26T20:30:00.000-07:00

Energy is a crucial part, in fact perhaps, the crux, of our existence, in that without it, we would not exist, and so it is relatively fascinating how our extreme lack of understanding doesn't cause our very own implosion. I had acupuncture done yesterday and my administor was so in-tune with reading energy she was able to verbalize the exact types of energy I was releasing, and boy was I releasing, right out into the air like a thick fog the energy hung from just escaping my personal field...I've not experienced recognition of such profound release before, nor been so deep in my understanding of just how much muck a person can be holding within them that doesn't belong there. She first read from my pulse that my liver and gallbladder are out of wach, which was first brought to my attention by an energy healer in LA. She also correctly read a lot of repressed anger coming up...guilty as charged...as I mostly mused on the character I am creating from the script while also trying to let my mind go free while I was releasing, and not be attached to the need to know from where the energy came or from where it was going to go. I am quite aware of my repressed anger, as is very visable in the relationships I attract for my mirroring--when we get emotionally involved with partners, they are generally in our life to show us something, and I attract this terribly broken and angry men, a strong magnification of my own repressed feelings...I try to be practical with this anger, as there is plenty of usefullness surrounding a motivation to change the ways of the world that aren't functioning properly, but mostly, I just want to be freed of it...send it back to where it came from, and I intimated to my practitioner that I wished to give myself this gift of healing, so that I can attract a healthy intimate emotional relationship that I am well enough to enjoy, instead of these endlessly frustrating futile attempts to be a catalyst for someone else's change. I choose now to stay focused on my healing and my art, and for that reason I have decided to add the element of acupuncture to the life of my character, because I don't think I could recommend it more highly than to promote it through my own artform. And now, you should go get you some!

creative financing

2009-03-26T12:29:00.000-07:00

Exploring the possibilities of how to make this film easier to make brought up a few brainstorms. We got the talent, the material, the equipment, most of the locations...we are really on a roll. I am working on a career retrospective to hang as an art show for a fundraiser and awareness raiser about our project...some of the creation of the art will be filmed in character and put on a reel to be shown at the fundraiser. Now local businesses can get involved. We are inviting local businesses with store fronts (especially eco-conscious and animal friendly) to have exterior shots and product placement in the film. Please consider becoming a sponsor through these means of promoting your local Anchorage business at the same time. Our guerilla grass roots efforts to get this finsihed film to the mainstream will be unparallelled...and you'll be sorry you passed on this change if you don't get involved now, when we need your help the most! Here are the details:

“Aurora”- a no budget, heart and soul feature film is currently being shot in Anchorage with top notch equipment and crew…we are seeking eco-conscious Anchorage businesses to contribute to our efforts through the means of sponsorship. Though distribution is not yet in place, once completed we intend to market this film heavily through the means of film festivals, grass roots, guerilla efforts and appeal to many multi-faceted genres of interest which include but are not limited to Independent film, music, healing arts, spirit, raw foods and social empowerment.

“Aurora” – synopsis:
A broken spirited and mentally damaged bartender/wanna-be rock star begins a life-changing transformation when she is visited by an ethereal being in her dreams. The being brings forth powerful information in a loving means to help her heal and extend that healing on a planetary level. A character study at it’s core, this unique look at the human spirit and ability to transform will be inspiring across the globe.

Aurora sponsorship profile:

$500- exterior shot of your building
$1000- exterior shot, plus name in credits
$1500- product placement, name in credits

If you want it...come and get it...for crying out loud

2009-03-24T15:40:00.000-07:00

The theme of this week has been, "If you want it, go get it!" It's coming up in every conversation, youtube video ect. I watched a positive affirmational interview with Will Smith where he said, the only difference between his success and anyone that is still struggling is his willingness to knock on doors and keep knocking and not take no for an answer. A lot is brewing in my little brew pot...I'm embarking on my biggest project ever with the movie I am making and it's going to take a lot of blood sweat and tears...for reals...my character runs the gamet of emotions, but it is going to be my gift to the Universe in exchange for all I have been given...and my gift to myself is now to take conscious inventory of all I have been given and feel the gratitude warranted, and to finally open myself in allowance for the abundance I am worthy of. And now I'm going to get it!!

Come see me tonight...I'll be wearing 10 hats

2009-03-20T11:51:00.000-07:00

I made chocolate covered strawberries for the event!

Today

2009-03-19T01:27:00.000-07:00

It was one of those days where you feel like you’re totally out of sync with the Universe and for some reason all these blocks pop up in your way, user error, system fail, road block, countdown to implosion…I call these kinda days, “saving up your good luck” days, but this one was out of the twilight zone…something fishy is in the pool and it’s making me uncomfortable…it’s plenty of the typical fear based reactions thrust in your face, and some unnerving level of community and municipality struggle against anyone trying to make changes…it seems like, maybe if only in my mentality, that it’s all money based, which I have a personal problem relating money to greed…this might be why I am constantly in my own way about money-I somehow think affluence is a mindset that causes more trouble than it’s worth, but I don’t like my own lil pile of troubles either…I want a lot of it so I no longer need to worry about anything that arises requiring the use of it—problems I think might have to do with attachment…OK, so I have everything I want in place (mostly) so now how to keep it? See, fear based thinking, that I have set up a scenario I am finally happy with only to have it taken from me…stop it monkey brain…the Universe is on my side for the greater good…I just sometimes forget that I’m sitting under a little umbrella of stars while the master energy movers are up there working the puzzle out for me…am I ready to accept the feeling of abundance and the level of responsibility it brings…this is my mission.

“we make mistakes. we are human. and we admit our mistakes and we move on. and if we're lucky, we get a chance to forgive those that hurt us. so that we may experience the true meaning of love. for love really is unconditional” Kat Brooks wrote this on her myspace blog today, and it sums up, I think why I stayed in an abusive relationship for so long…I was so deeply attached to him that I felt so much compassion for the pain I know he is constantly struggling with…and I can still love him through the pain he caused me, but I don’t have to stay in it to continue to experience true unconditional love…and in fact, I had to get that broken situation out of my life in order to make room for all the wonderful things that were ready to fill the empty space…and from afar I can pray for him to get the help he needs, and to steer clear of future dramas by going around them when I can see them coming from a mile away.

2009-03-17T03:51:00.000-07:00

This beautiful little energy being was cast as the dream stone in my film this week when I found her in a box in a shop that had yet to even be put on display--waiting for me obviously, with finally the perfect partner found, production is getting under way...I can't tell you what it means to be on the cusp of planetary awakening wondering for so long what I can do to impress the process, kind of in the way of my own progression for so many years and then watching the magic of coming back to life and finding new magical artforms with which to express this bringing it all full circle in understanding and of life imitating art and vice versa...I understand also why I have been blessed with so much work and that which I have reaped I am finally able to sow in my ability to see the natural path and get out of my own way as the Universe conspires to help me even as those in the dark would strive to tear me down, I leave them in their sorrow and pray for their safe journey..."Aurora" the script I have worked out of my lifelong head filled head is finally on paper and, as my co-director and director of photography put so elequently, has finally breathed it's first breath...and I am so excited to be the momma of this project that I feel has the potential to activate miles and miles of sleepers...wake up wake up, wherever you are--here we come to drag you out the door into full spectrum light~

Today is always the first day...

2009-03-12T18:37:00.000-07:00

of the rest of your life, and Now is all you have...so it's time to heed your wake-up call and begin the possibly complicated task of digging yourself out of your mess. Universal upheaval is all around us...I've been doing a lot of serious work and soul searching and life changes for the last several years, and I'm the first to say it's not all peaches and cream, but when you get to a point where you are looking at a person in the mirror that you have faith in, it's all worth it. Rhianna is all over the news for reporting domestic violence and admitting to putting up with it for a long time. People are coming out of the woodwork to explain their own circumstances and the reasons they have found themselves trapped in abusive relationships, or returning over and over to the cycle, the kiss, the kick, the kiss, the kick...I can't deny that these stories are inspiring me to share my own circumstances in the hope that I can inspire just one powerful woman to get away from her abusive man and get that power back to work for the good of the planet. We are living in a splendid time of chaos and transition and it's heart wrenching work, but things that have been in the shadows for so many ages of existence are being brought to light...and there is no choice but to eventually look at these things, or, in a manner of speaking, implode from your own contradictions and leave the planet, hopefully to return in a fine and enlightened form. The Indigo and the Crystal energy is flooding the planet now...but a great percentage of the older Indigos are "sick" from their experiences (especially botched up childhoods) on the planet up to this point. Some of these people are lost in addiction and anger, and while we are drawn to them as our soulmates, being around them is still naturally destructive to our own health and well-being...you can see the light pulsating inside these people and you want to help them, but you can't do this by giving away your own power and allowing them to consume you. They will have to do their own work so you need to cut the ties now before it is too late for you to realize your need is to heal yourself first, before you will be of use to anyone else...and the anyone else's I speak of really are going to have no interest in the useful information you have for them until they come to it on their own. So let's talk in layman's terms...you know if you are being mentally, emotionally, sexually and/or physically abused. It might seem like it's too daunting to leave...your abuser has a huge emotional hold over you and he may even have his own family convinced that you are the bad guy--he may even be able to make you feel bad enough to stay and put up with it, or come back each time you summon the strength to get away with his continuing promises to change...but the bottom line is this...it doesn't matter what kind of pile of shit you need to shovel out of to get away from your abuser...do it, and do it now, and don't go back. Your children, brothers, sisters and humanity at large are counting on you, yes YOU, to reclaim your power and get your elbow grease on, because YOU are the one you have been waiting for. You can't save him from himself and you can't sit under his pile of dog doo while the world is waiting for you...because you are the only one who can take the step and make the change...you don't need a man to validate who you are. You don't need a man keeping you from having supportive wonderful friends, and you don't need a man to make you feel alive or loved. Today you can choose to love yourself enough to be all that you need...choose today to walk away...and watch the magic begin. I've been there and in love and understanding I reach my heart out to you to give you the strength to leave...because you're worth it.